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Cottage Country

When an idiot brother is about to ruin a romatic weekend of two lovers, one bloody accident leads to another

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-12-2013

A naughtly mixture of humor and bloody murder

Successfully plays out comedy and murder throughout the movie in an unusual but successful cocktail.
7

Olympus has Fallen

Terrorists take over whitehouse, fallen security agent comes to the rescue

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
02-01-2014

The same old mistakes

A dark atmosphere and some hefty gung-ho warfare could have made this intense, were it not for the inevitable patriotism and flag waving, annoying Hollywood plot conveniences and stereotype terrorists (oh come on - nuclear launch codes, again?).
7

Bad Milo

When people agitate this man, a demon comes out of his ass and eats them. No Shit.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-01-2014

Naughty and pleasantly bizarre

but the constant rectal suffering could make you nauseous.
7

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

Hobbits reach the mountain and Bilbo confronts the dragon

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-01-2014

Beautiful failure

You have to admire the sheer beauty and magnitude of this spectacle. But there is also a feeling of disappointment, as I cannot really get into this movie, feel for any of the characters, appreciate the campy slapstick action or take in the wash of special effects.
7

2 Guns

Two undercovers get into a corrupt mess and need each other to fight their way out again

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-01-2014

Solid chemistry but forgetable

A solid action comedy with good chemistry between the main players. It lacks standout moments though, I have already forgotten this movie.
7

Cosmopolis

During his limo ride to get a haircut, a wealthy financial has conversations (?) with people he meets along the way.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-01-2014

Mindbending by chit chat

I was mad at this movie, for its pretentious, incomprehensible and endless bull (or poetry, you decide). I think I fell asleep twice. Then, the next day, I couldn't wait to see how it ended. It's a mindfuck alright.
6.5

G.I. Joe: Retaliation

When almost all GI Joe's are taken out, it's up to the remaining 3 Joe's to save he world and restore the team.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-01-2014

Succesfull action silliness for adults

Sure it's over the top silly. But there's something right about this movie. It doesn't claim to be more than it is, some of the action is just plain cool, and it has the right amount of violence and gloominess to prevent you from feeling like you're watching PowerRangers.
7

Frozen

A princess has to save her sister the queen, who has uncontrollable magical freezing abilities and brought disaster to her kingdom.
average 8.5

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-01-2014

Already a classic

A gem. Loaded with great moments, beautiful songs, heartfelt emotion and it looks stunning. My boys ranked it number one, despite their general disapproval of anything princes-related.
8.5

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
15-01-2014

Beautifully animated modern fairytale

This one has the whole package: incredible graphics, lovable characters and convincing storytelling. Though I am not a big fan of main characters singing in movies like this, it did not disturb me too much....
8.5

American Hustle

Con man and con woman doing a lot of conning, with Feds, politicians and mobsters involved

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
17-01-2014

Great acting in a movie filled with conning

Conning, trickery, treason and seduction with a thin layer of comedy showing through occasionally, in a balanced movie with great acting by the main characters
8

The Expendables 2

A simple recovery job quickly turns into something big for the Hollywood A-team of self proclaimed dinosaurs

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
18-01-2014

Guilty pleasure

I liked it. Brutal, dumb, heavy duty action with some laughs thrown in.
7

The Wolf of Wall Street

Fraudulent stock broker for whom the sky seems the limit eventually loses his family and fortune

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
21-01-2014

Convincing view on Wall Street life to the extreme

Memorable movie that provides a surprising but convincing view on the extreme life style of the (hopefully) atypical stock broker Jordan Belfort. At times it is difficult not to like the main character, while at the same time feelings of disgust may surface as well. Worth the 3 hour watch!
8.5

The Spectacular Now

About adolescents and the challenges and choices they have to face during the process of growing up

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
24-01-2014

How to deal with adolescent hardships (in a non-comic way)

No action or comedy flick, but a nice movie when you are in the right mood for an insightful trip into the world of adolescents and the challenges they have to face. Key words: future plans and careers, (badly ending) relationships, and alcohol abuse (to name just a few we all know so well ;) )
7

The Colony

Members of a colony, trying to survive in a frozen world, respond to an SOS signal from a nearby colony. But what they find...

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-01-2014

Frozen B-movie

The dark alley scenes: fine. The outside snowworld: even better. But the uninspired badguys and cat and mouse action is just plain mediocre. Then it secures its B-status by having desolate survivors with full make-up on, and Rammstein rockmusic during fight scenes.
6.5

Her

A man in the foreseeable future starts dating his operating system after the painful separation from his wife
average 7.8

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
16-08-2014

True love

Part of me wished the artificial intelligence and the relationship evolved more slowly, more bumpy, more clumpsy. But it still stands as a unique love story, that actually evokes that bubbly love feeling amidst a cold digital context. Johansson's irresistible voice is a master stroke too.
7.5

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
28-01-2014

Relationships in the digital era 2.0

An interesting movie on the role technology plays, and might play in the near future, in human life. Including a redefinition of relationships, love, emotions and ultimately the consciousness debate is touched upon as well. If you managed to finish this review, you might just like the movie ;)
8

Movie 43

Teenagers scout the internet for a movie that doesn't exist, taking them through various bizarre movies as they go

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-01-2014

fascinatingly unfunny

In itself I can see potential in the jokes on offer. But I just gazed at these clumsy, grime and bizarre sketches without laughing once, becoming almost fascinated in the process. It's one of those 'You need the right drug first' movies, but if you find which one, it could be hysterical.
4.5

The Dallas buyers club

A macho man with hiv (illegally) starts selling alternative medication to help fellow hiv sufferers

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
29-01-2014

And the oscar for actor in a leading role goes to....

Great indepth acting by McConaughey (who apparently also did some serious preparation by not eating much during the preceding year) , in a compelling movie based on a true story. Oscar winning material!
8.5

12 years a slave

Another movie on slavery

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
29-01-2014

An African American living in New york is kidnapped and sold as slave

Based on a true story addressing the gruesome consequences of slavery in the southern states of mid 19th century America. Although I can appreciate this movie and the message it portrays, there are other movies on this topic that I find more memorable.
7

Captain Philips

An American cargo ship gets hijacked by Somali pirates (Arrr matey!)
average 8.0

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-03-2014

Nailbiting, sweaty and genuine experience

Maybe it is a tad too long, but for sure this is a compelling, griping and intense experience.
8

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
01-02-2014

Boats, pirates and a psychological battle between two captains

Highly recommended movie, at first glance simply about the hijacking of a cargo ship. But it also conveys a deeper message by implying the complex situation in many African countries, where the difference between right and wrong is not always that clear. Authentic acting by Tom Hanks.
8

The Internship

With no relevant skills, two sacked salesmen enlist for an internship at Google.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
02-02-2014

404 humor not found

Instead of having a ball with the funny premise, this movie is extremely generic, consisting entirely out of tiresome jokes and gut-wrenching Hollywood cliches so banal it made me look away from the screen.
3.5

The Lone survivor

A mission in Afghanistan by American navy seals goes awfully wrong
average 7.2

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-02-2014

Okay these guys are tough

As these men are battered & bruised, smashed against rocks, cornered and shot, the increasing dread of death and hopelessness comes across very well. Intense movie that stuck for a while.
8

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
05-02-2014

Shoot 'em up between navy seals and taliban

Main part of the movie consists of Americans and Taliban chasing, shooting, injuring and killing eachother. Apparently a navy seal can sustain more injury than Iron Man ("is there a bullet in my head?"). Overall an okay movie for those of us not easily scared by bloody scenes.
6.5

Philomena

A journalist and an elderly lady are on a quest to find her son who she had to give up for adoption fifty years ago

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
09-02-2014

Light hearted drama that is actually worth a watch

Sympathetic movie with a touching story based on true events (including the dubious role of the catholic church in child adoptions in Ireland), and very convincing acting by Judi Dench. Ideal movie for men who want to show their partner they actually have a sensitive side as well....
7.5

Iron Sky

Not realizing the war is over, the nazis on the dark side of the moon are preparing an invasion of earth

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-02-2014

They should have gone crazier

Smart ideas and very smart looks, but ultimately it lacks the inspiration to really succeed as either a comedy or action adventure. A b-ish flavour remains. They should have gone whack.
6.5

All Is Lost

Solo sailer tries to survive when his ship is rammed by an adrift sea container.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-02-2014

Intimate and gripping

Very good and very close portrait of a man struggling against all odds. The absence of dialogue is mesmerizing and effective. I felt guilty opening a beer while watching this. I think that's a good sign (but I still opened one nonetheless).
8

Riddick

After being left for dead on a hostile planet, a ship full of mercenaries is Riddicks's only way off the planet

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
15-02-2014

A B-movie in disguise

Non-stop pretty, but also painfully slow, tedious and full of uninspired really poor dialogue. They are too eager to portray Riddick as a mysterious, ubercool, enigmatic hero, instead turning him into an unsympathetic showoff.
4.5

Lego Movie

The insignificant life of a lego nobody turns on it's head when he is the chosen one to act against evil plans that threaten lego world

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
16-02-2014

Fantastic frantic

Could have gone wrong in many ways, but did not. Loaded to the brim with action, jokes, fantastic visuals and brilliant 'real' animation. I did think it was a little to nervous and restless, and overcomplicated for kids to follow comfortably.
8

The Heat

Uptight FBI agent must work with streetsmart cop - both females this time.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
23-02-2014

as is

The feminine variation on the buddy-cop theme gives it a slight edge over the expected experience: funny but not hilarious, entertaining but not engrossing, good but not great.
7

Sharknado

A storm brings hungry sharks way inland, especially those in the tornado!

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
02-03-2014

Succesfully bad

With a story like that, this movie needed to be bad. And it succeeded effortlessly, with an helpless actors, abysmal effects, bad editing and incoherent lighting in every scene. So if you are INTO that sort of thing, you could be sort of entertained. If not, like a said: it really is bad.
6

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

The winners from the previous games are used to suppress rebellion or something

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-03-2014

Pretentious, boring and annoying

I found it impossible to care about this world or any of the lifeless flat characters inhabiting it. I didn't understand what they were doing or what was driving them, and was annoyed and bored out of my mind. One of the rare movies I switched off - so I guess you could say I liked Sharknado better.
4

Phantom

Russian sub must carry a mysterious crew and device along on a mission

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
16-03-2014

Good intentions drowned in mistakes

Some fine actors and submarine drills can't compensate for a miscasted Duchovny and slow and insecure script. Most exciting scenes are destroyed when, in the heat of a moment, Duchovny asks "what are you doing now", and the captain actually pauses his command and starts to explain!!!!
6

Blue Jasmine

Woman becomes emotionally unstable after her wealthy, cheating and fraudulent husband goes to prison, but tries to get on with her life anyway

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
17-03-2014

Typical Woody Allen movie?

I heard rumours that some Woody Allen movies are actually not that bad. This certainly is a movie aimed at character building and slow story telling, but nevertheless kept me interested till the last scene. Eventually, I even felt sorry for the main character, played by Cate Blanchett.
7

The Campaign

Cocky congressman suddenly faces competition from an unlikely candidate in the elections

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-03-2014

Nice, but could have used a smarter story

Funny and witty spoof of contemporary politics, that's probably not far from the truth either. Slightly let down by a simplistic and predictable story.
7

Independence Daysaster

Aliens strike from above and below, smalltown folk (and president) scramble into action

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-04-2014

Bad - but sympathetic and unpretentious

You B-movie you! With your continuous bombastic music blasting over shaky camera shots of people constantly jumping in and out a car! But it's sort of all right, it does what it can. Effects are sufficient. Fair game.
5

The Impossible

A family tries to survive the 2004 tsunami in Thailand

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-04-2014

Terrifying and heart shattering

A terrifying and heart shattering experience throughout. Very well done, although maybe a little over eager to bring the viewer to tears.... but goodness did they succeed!
8

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

An office nobody frequently gets lost in his daydreams, but for a last assignement and a love interest, his adventures must become real

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-04-2014

Wonderfull movie that had even more potential

Great idea, beautifully done in a movie with a big heart. I thought the pacing was not quite right and it could/should have been even more magical.
7.5

Sucker Punch

Girl is institutionalized, but lives violent fantasies while dancing which help her escape it the end. Or something.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-04-2014

Violent video clip, done with much love

Easy to fault, but I was amused by the violent, fabulously stylized, unearthly, anachronistic action, as well as the moody and steamy atmosphere. Absorb it like a videoclip, then you may get it.
7.5

Thor The Dark World

Evil forces want to bring darkness to the worlds. Thor intervenes

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-04-2014

Another curious case of stellar looking boredom

I just sat around wondering how I could be so bored with so much beautiful looking stuff going on. Natalie Portman, who is dragged into celestial warfare, doesn't appear to be impressed by any of it either. Points are solely for looks and effort.
6.5

Escape Plan

A man's job is to test jail security by actually escaping from them. But then the next gig is a jail that was built on all his teachings.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-04-2014

Too cliched to be great

The characters and story are too much typical Hollywood cliches and fantasies to make this really exciting. So we are left with a mildly entertaining jailbreak flick.
6.5

Pompeii

Slave gladiator falls for girl above his league, then has to fight his way to freedom through evil romans and erupting volcanos

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-05-2014

Fine, but not all it could have been

Sort of a fine and good looking flick. Would have been much more intense if the characters weren't as 1-dimensional, the story a bit more refined, and the whole thing looked a little less clean and fabricated.
6.5

47 Ronin

A bunch of samurai revenging their master
average 6.2

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-09-2014

Classic Samurai tale, but not as exciting as it could be

Loaded with beautiful and colorful Japanese scenery, folklore and tradition. Should satisfy Samurai enthusiasts. I wasn't really sucked in though, perhaps because there's no clear character to focus on.
7

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
06-05-2014

Even one hundred samurai could not have saved this movie

Mythical Japanese story presented as cinematic fairytale with overly dramatic and generally unconvincing acting. Every now and then some nice special effects to keep the bored viewer slightly entertained....
5.5

Terminator 3 Rise of the Machines

Again, a terminator comes back in time to secure the future. Again, he is hunted down by an advanced terminator model

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
11-05-2014

A lesser but stilll adequate episode

Not as epic and overwhelming as the preceding parts, in part because of the rather dull main characters. Still, there's plenty of Terminator goodness in here to have a good time. Average actionmovies back then still were more fun than the soulless fx bonanzas we get nowadays.
7

Man of Tai Chi

In order to help his master and temple, a Tai Chi expert is forced to use this soft style in a hard way in illegal underground fights

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
11-05-2014

Dozing off during bare-handed fights to the death.... weird

Who knows: these could be some of the most complicated and extraordinary fighting scenes ever. But it is all remarkably boring, because of the unoriginal story and lack of any tension. Keanu portays one of the most dull one-trick pony villains ever.
6

Godzilla (2014)

Monsters attack (was that a spoiler already?)

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-05-2014

Still too much Hollywood for it's own good

Big and bold monster rampage is the easy part, making it count is hard. Some surprisingly stylish scenes are overshadowed (I think it had two artdirectors) by the usual movie laziness en cliches - like people constantly briefing each other about things everyone's already doing. A fun ride though.
7.5

Catwoman

Girl murdered, then ressurects with cat powers. Revenge.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-06-2014

Maybe girls like it

The problem is that they made this into some sort of girl movie, with girlpowermusic, a love interest with a Ken, an evil beauty make-up corporation and a bouncy and goofy main character. Worse: they managed a half-naked woman walking around in leather to be completely non-sensual.
4

Django Unchained

Bounty hunter frees slave, together they go on a violent trip set things straight and rescue the slave's wife.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-06-2014

Up with Tarantino's standards and trademak style

A bold, daring and violent way to address slavery, full of Tarantino-style endless chit-chat and under-the-skin tension that somehow keeps you on the edge of your seat. I thought Django himself was overshadowed and flat, but then again I am not a big fan of Foxx.
8

I, Frankenstein

Frankenstein's monster's chosen profession, being alive and all, is demon hunter. Together, with gargoyles!

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-06-2014

Pointless and quite uninteresting

The creation of the monster is briefly told in flashbacks while the opening titles are still running. The fact that he is Frankentein's is hardly relevant. He is basically a strong, civilized dude fighting demons, in a dull and stiff copycat of Underworld and Van Helsing Gothic stylistics.
4.5

Edge of Tomorrow

A not so brave solider gets killed on a beach fighting aliens, but then gets to relive that day over and over again, get better at it each time

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
15-06-2014

Slamming scifi with a twist

A neat thrill ride based on a great story, cool action and splendid visuals. Maybe the story was over-centered at the main character and story, making it feel like the suffering of the rest of world wasn't an issue. But who cares.
8

300 Rise of an Empire

Greeks vs Persians fight slomo. Mostly on sea.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-07-2014

Beautiful painting of heroic bloodshed

This side effect of the wonderful style is that is also creates veil that blocks connection with the people and story. But as a glorious ode to violence and bravery, I thought it was impressive, intense and beautifully crafted. Also: Eva Green.
7.5

Eagle vs. Shark

Nerdgirl in pursuit of a nerdguy

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
07-07-2014

Touching

The lead actress steals your heart the minute she appears on the screen, and takes you into a funny, touching and quite unique love story. Looses some momentum as it progresses, though
7

Ender's Game

A youngster is the chosen one to be trained as spacefleet admiral and repell alien threat

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
24-07-2014

Kids in space

These kids are trained for space command by having them play a pointless Harry Potter floating game! This unwatchable movie is full of such nasty face palm moments, burying the sharp looking visuals deep beneath the surface. "He has a complicated response to authority" - who talks like that?
4.5

Carrie (2013)

Girl with telekenetic powers and a hideous religous freakmother is being bullied one time too many

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-07-2014

Identical yet inferior to the original

Who ordered this? A really pointless remake that does everything exactly the same, except for in the eerie atmosphere and masterful cinematography of the original. The only thing new is that the kids now have mobile phones with YouTube. Breathtaking. Moretz is overacting badly too.
5.5

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