BoiledDown.netIf everyone's a critic, then so are we! |
Parallels
A mysterious phonecall from a missing father leads people into a strange building that opens up to alternate earths

Wittenberg
12-02-2017

Nice idea poorly executed
Love the basic idea, but it's executed poorly with rather annoying young adults delivering really bad lines and making everything seem hopelessly amateuristic.Magellan
Astronaut on a lone mission to investigate signals suddenly coming from various locations in our solar system

Wittenberg
23-09-2021

Unable to compensate for the little resources it had
An irresistible story and some of the space graphics are not too bad. But they contrast starkly with the amateuristic 'interior' of the spaceship, and the bizarre procedures of the space flight and handling of possible alien artifacts (plastic bag?). I also missed a point or clue to any of it.I, Frankenstein
Frankenstein's monster's chosen profession, being alive and all, is demon hunter. Together, with gargoyles!

Wittenberg
09-06-2014

Pointless and quite uninteresting
The creation of the monster is briefly told in flashbacks while the opening titles are still running. The fact that he is Frankentein's is hardly relevant. He is basically a strong, civilized dude fighting demons, in a dull and stiff copycat of Underworld and Van Helsing Gothic stylistics.Cocaine Bear
Various people in the woods have to deal with a bear addicted to cocaine

Wittenberg
16-04-2023

Cult is hard
It is going for a cult status with an over the top story, a bit of gore, humor and loads of colorful, quotable characters. But I found none of these components particularly successful, and the pacing seems off as frankly I got quite bored with it.The Phoenix Project
Four scientists in a garage try to revive dead animals

Wittenberg
08-03-2015

Experiment failed
This could and should have been a geeky mind bending gem like Primer. But it is achingly slow at times, the science is underpowered and the scientists behave unnatural. Especially that Carter guy, who single-handedly wrecks this movie with really painful, unwatchable and ridiculous overacting.Geostorm
Mankind built a space system to keep the extreme climate in control, but then it starts to make things worse instead of better

Wittenberg
23-02-2018

All things wrong with big Hollywood productions
A terrible film that checks all the boxes of overblown Hollywood-Michael-Bay like hysteria, stupidity and shallowness.The Call-Up
Some gamers are invited to play a game in a lifesize simulated environment. It's all fun and games, until people actually die.

Wittenberg
07-01-2018

No twist?
I liked how it was all set up and some of the music in the beginning. But soon enough it is evident that the actors or screenplay are below par. But what bugged me the most is that they missed the opportunity to add some double layers and twists into the story, of which I can easily think of some.The Requin
Couple with issues hires a luxery villa on poles in the sea to get away from things, until a storm rips it off and drift them onto open sea. With sharks.

Wittenberg
15-03-2022

Too many issues
It's usually nice to view these disasters from the comfort of a lazy chair, but this one has too many issues. Fake effects, cheap and obvious use of stock material, subpar acting, overall implausible events and a really skewed sense of distance, depth and location in the sea.The Pope's Excorcist
... does an excorcism

Wittenberg
25-06-2023

By the book
It may try to add some extra's to the genre with the dungeon and what not, but mostly it feels like a textbook exorcism that is so by the book that you wonder why they bothered. Not scary, overacted, not interesting, I almost reached for my phone.Kin Dread
Traumatized guy, confined to a room making soundseffectcs, discovers something strange in his apartment and about his past

Wittenberg
14-11-2021

Could't follow or care
There might be a clever and interesting idea in here, but I am afraid it didn't quite come out for me. It was just to hard to follow, too vague to make sense and often got stuck like a car in a the mud.Jiu Jitsu
Man with memory loss appearantly is member of a team fighting a (very) Predator-like alien from another dimension

Wittenberg
14-02-2021

Nope. Still a B movie.
With steady reference to a comic book, some boldsy camera work and heaps of crazy martial arts this might have winded up being smirky and fun. But it is mostly tedious and bizarre, and the lead character appears to have been typecasted as a universal B movie karate dork.IO
Woman is trying to find cures for a dying world, but an uninvited stranger urges her to join him and catch the last rescue ship into space

Wittenberg
19-01-2019

Sympathetic but very boring
I really tried to get into the flow of this slow-burn movie, as a small, delicate an intimate story about big issues. But boring is boring, and the quasi-meaningful dialogue and cascade of pointless scenes made me yell COME ON too many times.Riddick
After being left for dead on a hostile planet, a ship full of mercenaries is Riddicks's only way off the planet

Wittenberg
15-02-2014

A B-movie in disguise
Non-stop pretty, but also painfully slow, tedious and full of uninspired really poor dialogue. They are too eager to portray Riddick as a mysterious, ubercool, enigmatic hero, instead turning him into an unsympathetic showoff.Capsule
Astronaut depens heavily on radiohelp from earth to get his faulty capsule to return home

Wittenberg
06-11-2016

A lot more was required to make it this bold idea work
A bold mov(i)e which almost exclusively shows the astronaut strapped in his seat. But the amateuristic, jumpy astronaut, the repetitious dialogues and unconvincing procedures are way insufficient to make it work. There's a twist at the end, but if you made it that far you'll probably no longer care.Warriors of the Future
Furure earth is polluted AND invaded by an alien plant, but high tech warriors attempt to use the plant to their advantage.

Wittenberg
10-12-2022

Cool action without a soul
Sure, there is some smart looking, pretty bad-ass exo-suit/robot/hi-tech warfare in here. But the movie is another truly awful Chinese attempt to copy dumb blockbuster vibes, boring characters, unclear action and yawn inducing cliche crap. Shit man, spend that money and CGI skills more wisely.The Finest Hours
Against all odds, courageous men on a small coastguard boat sail into a storm to help the crew of a wrecked oiltanker

Wittenberg
17-07-2016

Sunk
Not withstanding the good looks and production values, I thought this was a mess. The 50's atmosphere felt cliched, all characters are either obnoxious, one-dimensional or off, the love story was getting on my nerves and I was sort of glad it was over.The Monuments Men
In WWII, a specialized group sets out to save artworks from destruction or being stolen by the nazis

Wittenberg
07-09-2014

A very boring movie
A moviesubject in danger of being boring. And despite the A-list of actors and undoubtedly good intentions, I am sorry to say that it is.Firestarter (2022)
Girl tries to control and live with her ability to set things on fire, but evil people make her loose her cool

Wittenberg
05-06-2022

Left me cold (that punchline is probably taken)
One of those movies that, on the face of it, looks quite solid and adept, and makes you wonder why you're not enjoying it more. I think her parent's additional paranormal abilities get in the way of an already uninspired and even boring story that fails to ignite. (That's probably also taken.)Fantastic Mr. Fox
Fox and friends engage in a war with local farmers when they steal chickens

Wittenberg
13-11-2021

Did not push my buttons
It looks and feels artistically sound and could please Roald Dahl fans. Personally, I found the puppets not very pleasant to look at and I don't like the storytelling much. It's not outstandingly funny, exciting or clever, I did not know how to process it and even got a bit strangely agitated.Monster Hunter
Army ranger accidently winds up in another dimension where she must fight monsters

Wittenberg
21-03-2021

Awesomeness that left me cold
Such a potential premise, such a big budget, yet still so uninteresting and shallow. I thought only the finale back on earth was somewhat badass. The movie seems to look a lot like the game it was based upon, so perhaps fans will get more out of it.Moon 44
Pilot/cop goes undercover to a mining planet to oversee the convict pilots fighting of an alien invasion

Wittenberg
13-08-2023

A disappointing story in a cool scifi environment
The scenery, with it's dark and steamy hallways and spaceships, is remarkably like an Aliens, so that's good! The story though, is mostly convicts and and their navigators fighting, while the hero smokes cigarettes and tries to look cool - not really interesting.Ghost in the Shell: The New Movie
I think it's about cyborg major leading a team to resolve the assassination of the prime minister

Wittenberg
12-03-2017

Too complicated, not enough magic
It kept some of the magic of the original, but what it kept mostly is endless incomprehensible techno/politics that I could not stay focused on. It's not bad looking, but most of the art of the first movie is no longer here.The Last Full Measure
Pentagon hotshot reluctantly investigates a request for a posthumous medal of honor, and gets more and more involved as he talks to the veterans

Wittenberg
07-09-2020

Overdone
They managed to get a whole bunch a A-list actors giving all they got. But it feels overacted, over dramatized and forced down your throat. The clips during the end scroll demonstrate how veterans ACTUALLY talk. A noble cause for sure, but unnecessarily heavy-handed. Boring, even.The Matrix 4: Resurrections
Neo, living in the matrix again as a guy who made a matrix game, goes back into the matrix to save Trinity, who is in the matrix.

Wittenberg
28-02-2022

This time, the mindbender is the movie itself
I am not sure how a 4th sequel could have worked or what I wanted from it, but surely it wasn't this. I hate the lazy self aware 'meta' approach and the revisiting of classic moments. Nothing really works anymore, I cringed multiple times. An odd misfire, which makes you wonder how this came to be.Reminiscence
When the future is bleak, people instead relive past memories with a machine. The operator running that facility gets involved when a femme fatale shows up

Wittenberg
06-12-2021

half decent idea failed
The opportunity to do something cunning with the central idea gets lost in dull, pseudo film-noir kitsch, and the plot twist comes way too late to redeem it. But the real problems are inexcusably crincy Hollywood dialogue, audience pampering, poorly choreographed fights, among others.jung_e
A team tries to create the ultimate warrior by recycling a brain into new cyborg bodies, but can't figure out why she keeps underperforming

Wittenberg
27-01-2023

Nothing much to make it work
A bit of a Korean take on Ghost in the Shell, this should interesting. But is is not. The action is utterly unconvincing, and I hated some of the characters who either over-acted or were just cringey and one-dimensional. The story attempts some quasi deep theme's but it all falls flat immediately.The Soul (2022)
Prosecutor dying of cancer takes on a murder case that reveals dark secrets and transplants of more than just cells

Wittenberg
29-05-2022

Probably a brillant story but failed in presentation
I can appreciate the deep, well thought out story that stacks several layers of twists on each other, providing a real thinker of a crime story with perhaps a dash of horror. But it is presented so slowly en depressingly that I struggled to notice or care - and to stay awake too.USS Indianapolis: Men of Courage
This ship went on a secret mission to deliver the atomatic bomb, but was sunk on the way back, leaving the few survivors in hellish waters

Wittenberg
26-02-2017

Overreached
This movie's overblown ambitions of doing war, drama, survival, courtroom and romance contrast sharply with bad fx, uninspired screenplay, half-baked actors and dodgy editing. I was bored watching those men get eaten by sharks, which can't be right!Sex Ed
Mathteacher can't find a suitable job, so he settles for giving sex education to teens

Wittenberg
06-01-2015

Sex ought to be funnier than this
It had a lot going for it. A funny idea, a mellow Cuban vibe and potential. Unfortunately, the jokes won't ignite and many scenes just fall flat. Also contains a painfully misguided good-will-hunting-ish speech scene that isn't even trying to be funny.Hungerford
Some roomies/friends try to survice, after space visitors turn everyone into zombies. Good thing one of them was just doing a film project.

Wittenberg
13-11-2020

A minimal found-footage flick with annoying protagonist
I should sympathize with what they managed to create using very little resources, but it really was pretty basic zombie stuff. Some acted pretty good, some were ok, but the main character was a really annoying dude, and I started to despise his constant heavy breathing and drama.A walk among the tombstones
Private detective searching for a bunch of sickos mutilating and killing the loved ones of drug dealers

RockmeNow
24-07-2015

Another movie with Liam Neeson, definitely not one of his best
I am still wondering what the writers were thinking, as well as Liam Neeson reading the script. Watching a goldfish in a fish tank for 114 minutes must be more exciting than this...The 5th Wave
Girl tries to rescue her little brother amidst an alien invasion in 5 waves

Wittenberg
21-08-2016

Derailed
After a reasonable start, it derails in cheesy teenage love stories, unexciting screenplay, annoying army-squads comprising of teenagers and emo's, and sloppy movie making with aliens that conveniently look just like humans.Echoes
A woman goes back to her hometown when her identical twin sister is missing, and then a lot of twin things happen

Wittenberg
23-10-2022

A good idea implemented rather plainly
To have a crime and mystery revolve around twin sisters, making you guessing who is who and who did what, is not a bad idea. But it is done rather unimaginatively, making me indifferent instead of intrigued, and is based on rather soapy themes like family feuds, relationships and horses.Silent Hill Revelation
Girl must save her father, who is trapped in a place full of demons

Wittenberg
08-09-2013

Not as scary as it looks
This contains some very moody scenery and genuinely nightmarish footage. But the girl's plan is basically walking from one demon challenge to the next, and the rest of the story is either boring or incomprehensible.Synchronicity
Small teams get a timemachine to run work, one of them gets caught up in paradoxes

Wittenberg
17-06-2018

The story is there. Execution is not.
There's probably a really clever, if not somewhat difficult to follow, story in here. But the really lackluster execution, dull performances, suspiciously limited locations and depressing dark colors made me struggle to care... no matter how much bladerunner music they throw in!The Cellar
Family buys old house with an evil attic. I mean cellar.

Wittenberg
21-08-2022

A museum of horror cliches
There were some ideas that could potentially make this horror stand on it's own feet, and a handful of moments I liked. But for the vast majority of time this is smothered and glued together by a plethora of horrormovie cliches, as if they were checking them on a mandatory list.Godzilla: King of the Monsters
More huge titan monsters are awoken, and only Godzilla can restore the balance

Wittenberg
09-06-2019

Humans ruined earth AND this movie
Ruined by hollow, cringy and unfunny characters that speak exclusively in kitsch onelines and are monster experts, submarine commanders and anything else that comes their way. The monsters can't save it either, because, while fairly good looking, their fights are hard to follow and uninteresting.Resident Evil: The Final Chapter
With inside help, Alice gets a change to destroy the T-virus once and for all

Wittenberg
18-06-2017

Looks alright, feels numb
Much like the previous parts, this looks good and has some creative, vicious beasts on offer. But it also features the same hollow, boring screenplay and empty characters. It feels like a bunch of monster challenges glued together.Pacific Rim: Uprising
The monsters have been defeated, but not for long

Wittenberg
03-01-2019

Do you like robot fights?
Listen, I just came here for giant robots smashing huge monsters, and got what I wanted. Never mind that every person in this movie is a ridiculous Hollywood abomination and everything they say and do is stupid as can be, making this essentially a horrible Power Rangers movie with no soul.Evil Dead Rise
The book of the dead finds it way to a family living in an appartment

Wittenberg
05-06-2023

Uninspired and not scary enough
While it tried to be open minded about it, I did find a hard to have a true Evil Dead vibe without a cabin in the woods. More importantly though, this thing just wouldn't get scary for me, and even bored me at times. It's all a bit uninspired, and most of the characters I didn't care for much.Dark Cloud
Traumatized girl gets experimental therapy by being secluded in a house run by an artificial intelligence

Wittenberg
31-07-2022

Too tedious and uneventful
The story is familiar, but one that always seems open for a new interpretation, and it's a story that can work just fine with limited budget like this movie. Unfortunate, this one failed. It is mostly tedious, slow and uneventful, and lacks the philosophical or technological wit to make it deep.Sweet Home
A group of very different people in an appartment building is faced with fighting monsters

Wittenberg
23-02-2021

The characters hit a nerve I did not know I had
The groundwork was promising; colorful cartoon-like imagery, pleasantly weird monsters and potentially interesting group dynamics. But none of the people is particularly likable. In fact I started to despise many of them up until the point I could no longer watch it. Never had this before.Flatliners (2019)
Med students have themselves killed and take a peak at the afterlife before they are reanimated. But all is not fun and games.

Wittenberg
24-08-2019

Same problem as the original, executed worse
Like the original, the concept is awesome but I still find the clue rather dull and unsatisfying. Worse, in this version some of characters are quite annoying, some of their lines rather cheesy and the scares copied and uninspired. I was waiting for everyone to just say sorry and get this over with.Battle Royal
A class of students are placed on an island, and the game is that only one survives

Wittenberg
12-05-2022

A bloodfest turned into snoozefest
I was curious because it was listed somewhere as a real shocker, but the gore is not that bad - less so than many splatter horrors around. Furthermore I don't think I will ever get used to Japanese overacting and drama. The scholars are boring, annoying and their contemplations uninteresting.The Phoenix incident
You know those 4 skatedude guys who went missing in Arizona? It was aliens man!

Wittenberg
23-12-2015

Too shaky
Hurah! It's not just found footage; it's loud, noisy and restless shaky footage too. Which makes this mockumentary, shoving a conspiracy down our throat, rather tiresome and lame.Independence Daysaster
Aliens strike from above and below, smalltown folk (and president) scramble into action

Wittenberg
13-04-2014

Bad - but sympathetic and unpretentious
You B-movie you! With your continuous bombastic music blasting over shaky camera shots of people constantly jumping in and out a car! But it's sort of all right, it does what it can. Effects are sufficient. Fair game.The Brothers Grimsby
Lowlife british scumbag finds his long lost brother, and gets involved in his MI6 spy job along the way

Wittenberg
11-12-2016

Unprecentented vulgarities are not enough
Some of the scenes are so unbearably low and vulgar that in itself they could have given this movie some sort of cult status. Unfortunately, the lame action and humorless story surrounding is gets rid of that option.Captain Marvel
A woman with superpowers and generic green aliens and avengers and tessaracts and whfff

Wittenberg
27-09-2020

I felt nothing
A cheerful, colorful, slick looking action superhero movie that went straight through me.Prisoners of the Ghostland
A convict is chartered to rescue a woman from a mysterious group that is held captive by ghosts. If not he explodes.

Wittenberg
16-12-2021

Weird is not always good
Some pretty colors and scenes aside, this is mostly uncomfortably odd and confusing. You could argue that is to be commended for being different and broken free from the mainstream, but not in a way that I found pleasing.Captain America: Civil War
All superhero's turn on each other for some reason

Wittenberg
11-11-2016

More boring and emotionless over the top stuff
In endless talking scenes, which made my son decide to watch something else, all sorts of story-lines from other movies are desperately and uninterestingly brought together. The battles are frantic but boring because noone ever gets hurt. And I still don't care about anyone.Movies found: 959 | max movies per page: 50 | Showing: 86 - 135
Previous Next