BoiledDown.netIf everyone's a critic, then so are we! |
Wounds
Bartender finds distrubing images on a telephone left by a customer, starts seeing bugs and is chosen for a mysterious cult ritual
Wittenberg
06-09-2020
Mixed feelings
When slow burning is done wrong, it is just slow. Near the middle it manages to spark some interest, only to loose it again because the writers couldn't figure out how to tie the story elements together. It's pretty ok though, mainly because the performances and created amtosphere.Obi-Wan Kenobi
Obi-Wan is forced to come into action when young princess Leia is abducted by the Empire
Wittenberg
12-08-2022
A rather tired bulge of more Starwars
It's always nice to have another fix of Starwars, but frankly it is getting increasingly harder to get high from it. This series was low-energy and somehow has no impact on the saga. There are also some poorly choreographed action scenes that may have worked in the 70's, but look ridiculous today.House of 1000 Corpses
Two couples on a roadtrip take detour to find the infamous Dr. Satan, but wind up in a house where a terrible fate awaits
Wittenberg
06-03-2022
Disturbing in an unpleasant and lazy way
Much of the unease comes from the nasty music and color-inverted imagery. It feels a bit like cheating. The rest still holds plenty of shock value, but somehow it felt like that was the sole purpose instead of telling a story. Like Rob went 'Oh look how shocking this is", "Just look at this scene!"The Last Voyage of the Demeter
A ship transports a doomed cargo from Transalvania to London.
Wittenberg
10-09-2023
Lacks inpsiration or surprises
Everything is there for a genuinely creepy experience: A mysterious monster, a squeaky wooden ship and gloomy dark seas. Yet I wasn't scared by it, perhaps even a little indifferent. There's something too modern about the style, and a lack of surprises or connection with the characters.The Golem
A woman tries to defend a secluded Jewish community by summoning a creature from the soil
Wittenberg
07-07-2019
Great setting, but second half is too directionless
It lays down a really good mood with the sober, deeply religious and ritualized community. But it feels like they forgot to think through what would happen once the Golem is there, so it starts to feel loose and deflates. The music, while good, was too eager and didn't really fit well.The Hangover III
The wolfpack gets involved in crazy mafia adventures yet again, but this time they're sober
Wittenberg
07-02-2016
I felt cheated
The 'what the hell happened last night' joke may have been running out of fuel. But as I watched the half-baked comedy that remained without it, I couldn't help but feel cheated.Deadpool 2
Deadpool looses his wife and wants to protect some kid
Wittenberg
15-10-2019
Lacks substance, just gags
The cynical nature of Deadpool and the kitsch, over-elaborate fighting scenes are the real aces of this movie, but after a while it gets exhausting and overdone, and with only a rather vague and messy story to fall back on I found myself strangely bored for the amount of stuff that goes on.Zathura
Jumanji in space
Wittenberg
18-04-2021
Lacking that extra something
This may appeal to a younger audience, but overall I felt it wasn't quite there. Actors are a bit lifeless, jokes fall flat, scenes drag on for too long. It's fine, but missing the spark, magic, wit or funfactor to make it appeal to a broader audience.Neighbors
Young couple with a baby has a fraternity move in next door. The war begins
Wittenberg
15-03-2015
Watching people having fun wasn't much fun
The lead actors put in a lot of energy and effort into it, but cannot save this mediocre comedy with a shortage of good jokes. The endless fraternity partying and self-contempted mayhem was rather exhausting to me.Errementari
Misunderstood and isolated, a blacksmith is keeping a hellish demon in captivity when a little girl enters his property
Wittenberg
28-10-2018
Too much like a musical
The style and dialogues are very overdone and overacted. This may give the movie a unique, almost musical play vibe to it, but it also means that is a bit dopey at times and not really scary either. I liked the Dante-proof scenes of hell near the end though.Man of Tai Chi
In order to help his master and temple, a Tai Chi expert is forced to use this soft style in a hard way in illegal underground fights
Wittenberg
11-05-2014
Dozing off during bare-handed fights to the death.... weird
Who knows: these could be some of the most complicated and extraordinary fighting scenes ever. But it is all remarkably boring, because of the unoriginal story and lack of any tension. Keanu portays one of the most dull one-trick pony villains ever.Iron Man 3
Iron man takes on a terrorist
Wittenberg
13-10-2013
Iron mess
Mindblowing events and technology, yet noone seems to give a damn. So neither did I. A mess of rushed storytelling, boredom, an unlikable hero, noise and so much Iron man suits that I stopped caring about any of them. Suicide by abundance.47 Ronin
A bunch of samurai revenging their master
Wittenberg
28-09-2014
Classic Samurai tale, but not as exciting as it could be
Loaded with beautiful and colorful Japanese scenery, folklore and tradition. Should satisfy Samurai enthusiasts. I wasn't really sucked in though, perhaps because there's no clear character to focus on.RockmeNow
06-05-2014
Even one hundred samurai could not have saved this movie
Mythical Japanese story presented as cinematic fairytale with overly dramatic and generally unconvincing acting. Every now and then some nice special effects to keep the bored viewer slightly entertained....The Da Vinci Code
Historian gets involved in relic hunt and cat and mouse game involving dark religious groups trying to cover up our past
RockmeNow
30-12-2014
I liked the book slightly more
Shallow movie with un unconvincing chain of events and rather lame acting. Some nice cinematic shots every now and then, but not enough to keep a serious critic like myself happy ;)Wittenberg
30-12-2014
Too far fetched
Some might enjoy this modern puzzle into ancient symbols, but I found it hard to buy into the endless array of plot conveniences and over smart people constantly being at the right time and place to solve the next far fetched piece of the over elaborate puzzle.Home
Colorful aliens take over earth, parking the humans in Australia. But one off them makes friends with a human....
RockmeNow
24-07-2015
Just another animated movie
An occasional smile during this okay movie, which is based on a rather unclear storyline. The 3d version does not seem to add much to the overall experience...Wittenberg
15-04-2015
A warm and and kind movie, but stumbles over itself most of the time
The aliens lack the looks and cuteness to really shine, and the story is incredibly restless and rushed, especially the first half. Halfway through, when we finally get who is who and what's going on, we find a good and creative heart in this movie.Michiel de Ruyter
The life of Michiel de Ruyter, portrayed in 151 minutes
Wittenberg
03-04-2016
Too presumptuous for it's own good
I can appreciate the detailed depiction of this era and it's sea battles, but this movie insists it is a 'real' pro movie with an overload of cliche movie tricks like slow-motion, too much pretentious music and lord knows how many sub-bass boom sounds - sometimes for no reason at all.RockmeNow
24-07-2015
A mixture of overly dramatic cheap cinematic tricks and shallow acting
Highlights of the movie are the battles at sea, which are rather convincing. Perhaps also somewhat interesting in terms of historical information about this legendary dutch admiral, or for people familiar with the locations this movie was filmed ( I recently visited Vlissingen myself).Downsizing
Couple decides to shrink and live in a world or other shrunk people, in pursuit of happiness and for sustainability of earth
Wittenberg
22-12-2019
Disappointing second half
Up until they are shrunk, this is set up really nicely, putting in effort to make this idea work and making me eager to find out what's next. But then the story takes a u-turn with a slightly whiny, society critical theme, a horribly overacting Vietnamese, all making the smallness sort of pointless.Maggie
Father gets to take care at home of his daugther, in her last few days before turning into a zombie
Wittenberg
26-06-2016
Sympathetic but hollow
I liked the idea of focusing on just one case amidst a global zombie mayhem, and Schwarzenegger is probably at his best ever. Ultimately though, I thought there was a lack of substance and depth, and the pretty shots starting feeling as a coverup for a slightly empty shell.Dummie de Mummie en de tombe van Achnetoet
After a Dutch children's book, in which a family takes their fostered mummy-son to Egypt so he can find his roots
Wittenberg
13-11-2017
A save harmless watch for the kids
A mellow, save and relaxed story with some adventure and giggles but nothing too crazy.TrollHunter
Found footage of a filmcrew following a trollhunter in Norway
Wittenberg
11-11-2013
Could have been much better if we believed in any of this
The shaky shots in darks woods are effective, as are the sound effects. But the movie is running out fuel quickly, the trolls are a bit too much to buy into the 'actual footage' thing, and the filmcrew are both scared out of their wits and rather indifferent about their adventures at the same time.Captain Harlock: Space Pirate
In a spacewar for access to earth, a man inflatres a space pirate's ship to bring him down. Gradually, he starts to doubt where the real evil lies
Wittenberg
13-05-2016
Just enjoy the pretty graphics
Some stunning and quite unique 3d designs can't make up for the usual overacted, over dramatic way everyone behaves. And a pirate ship that is literally indestructible isn't really helping to make the otherwise vivid combat scenes exciting.Area 51
Armed with camera's , some teens attempt to sneak in area 51 and catch a glimps of what's in there
Wittenberg
13-08-2015
Great idea doesn't quite deliver
A clever idea that could have yielded some scary footage. Unfortunately, the teens in question are bit bland and unsympathetic, their efforts for this stunt are a bit over the top, and once inside it's a bit too messy and rushed to deliver true scares. Should have been toned down a little.Tides aka The Colony
Space colonists return to see if earth is habitable again, but get caught up in tribes competing with each other
Wittenberg
03-08-2021
Promising beginning, so-so rest
Initially the wet, misty landscape sets an moody atmosphere, and the story manages to pull you in. As it progresses though, the madmax shenanigans are okay but felt a bit anticlimactic, and as a whole it looses some energy and mystery.Rebel Moon – Part Two: The Scargiver
The assembled squad must now defend the farmers against the evil space people
Wittenberg
21-04-2024
A failure with some nice looking stuff here and there
In the end there was some satisfying space warfare porn, and I like how this movie has it's own distinct look. But other than that this is such a strange failure. 100% flat characters, cringy lines, kitschy slowmotion scenes of grain harvesting, and an overall sluggishness woven throughout it all.Sense8
Group of people who can sense each others senses across the world, work together to fight those that oppose them
Wittenberg
17-07-2021
Too long for it's own good
After some getting into, the concept becomes quite amusing, even with the odd mixture of campy humor, LHTBQ erotica and bloody violence. But halfway season two it gets tiresome and drags on, and the way their combined skills get them out of heated situations becomes gimmicky. Did not finish.Megamind
Two rival aliens crashland on earth. Since one of them seems predestined to be the hero, the other one reluctantly sets out te be the evil villain
Wittenberg
01-11-2015
Ok humor space adventure
A reasonable adventure with a few good laughs, but overal it sort of lacked the spark is paced a bit too slow.The Outpost
Surrounded by high ground, US soldiers in Afganistan try to survive in this highly untactical basecamp
Wittenberg
30-08-2020
Generic characters having an intense firefight
This is being applauded for it's realism, but unfortunately that meant for me that I remained somewhat indifferent during the long intense finale, because up until that point all they were were cursing, chit-chatting, anonymous soldiers. Armadillo WAS realism and had relatable, likable people in it.Mutant Girl Squad
A girl with a mutated knive hand joins a group of other mutant girls to make a stand to those who oppose them
Wittenberg
28-04-2023
Outrageously extreme yet still slightly boring
I really wanted to like this more, as it is a deliciously bizarre Powerrangers with gore, fountains of blood and insane mutations like a chainsaw tentacle coming from someone's butt. Fantastic anarchy, but I also noticed it is utterly flat and empty, making me forget this movie in mere days.Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV
Superwarriors defend the good people from the bad people who are after the crystal that empowers the good people
Wittenberg
06-06-2023
A strange but not necessarily tasty mix
Unfamiliar with the Final Fantasy lore, I needed some time to digest the mix of knights driving Audi's in a futuristic world. I liked some of the designs though, and halfway through the story got pretty exciting. But ultimately, the confusing action scenes and hollow characters didn't do it for me.Free Birds
Turkeys travel back in time to wipe their species from thanksgiving menu forever
Wittenberg
22-12-2013
Somehow it didn't really work.
It's a vibrant, original, good looking adventure with plenty of good jokes... yet still it doesn't quite take off. Something flat and distant remains, and maybe relating to turkeys in a time machine is just a bit too much to ask.Coma
Man wakes up in a comatose world, consisting only of chunks of memories... and malicious beings that hunt for him and other like him
Wittenberg
30-05-2021
Boredom in a spectacular world of ideas
One of the coolest and original ideas I've seen in a while, and it looks as cool as the idea itself is. It is therefore all the more frustrating and disappointing that I kept falling asleep. I am guessing it's the boring, over-simplified characters and the vague, pointless missions they set out for.The Days
Series about the Fukushima disaster
Wittenberg
20-02-2024
Surely this was more nerve wrecking?
We followed this series with interest, but it felt like it failed to capture the terrifying race against time this must have been. There's a lot of staring, sitting around, hesitation and discussion. An on-point observation about Japanese culture perhaps, but I wonder if it went this way.Prityazhenie (Attraction)
A spaceship crashlands in Russia
Wittenberg
13-11-2017
part fresh , part meh
I was quite impressed with the fresh sights and sounds at first. But then the story collapsed, the army's plan was apparently to just drive around forever so it was up to some annoying street kids to handle this event. Meh.The Predator
The predators are coming back to earth. The good, the bad and the loony try to deal with it.
Wittenberg
13-01-2019
Too much over the top nonsense stuff, taking away the magic
It was good to hear the predator music again, but not the rather cringe worthy lines delivered by the cliched and over the top characters in this movie. How did the biologist turn into a skilled commando instantly? The spacedogs - I don't know... just too many things not quite right in here.Jellyfish Eyes
Boy and his mother move to a place where the children have little creatures, which they can later use against a great danger
Wittenberg
03-09-2023
A unique but ultimately aimless movie
While the bizarre and colorful little monsters projected on a real world provide an original en wholesome experience, I had trouble getting into this movie. It's too childish for adults, but too lifeless and down for children. Not to keen on some of the acting either.XX
4 short horror stories directed by women (but I wonder if that ought to be noteworthy)
Wittenberg
08-05-2017
ha that's nice okay next one
Seeing some shorter stories was a nice for once, and there was an addictive quality to them to make you do one more. Quality of the stories was somewhat inconsistent and none of them struck me as particularly great, More like: ha that's nice okay next one.Unicorn Wars
Adult animation about colorful bears slaying their sworn enemy: unicorns
Wittenberg
15-01-2024
Irresitable concept but hard to like
The bizarre story and bloody cartoon violence promised a unique experience, but I found the bears too unlikable and too annoying for this, so it was hard to live the moment with them. The finale partially makes up for it, offering something of a more profound experience.The Eye (2008)
After an eye transplant, a woman starts seeing strange and unsettling things
Wittenberg
02-02-2013
Sits a bit too comfortably in contemporary horror
Some okay moments and ideas can't hide the fact that we are getting getting used to this new japanese style horror thing.The Forest
Woman heads off to japan to find her twin sister, who was last seen wandering into suicide forest Aokigahara
Wittenberg
25-09-2016
A missed opportunity
Considering the terrifying setting of the movie, I was quite disappointed that it only had rather mundane, predictable and mostly pointless jump scares to offer. It's not too bad, but hopefully not the final word in movies situated here.Samsara
A collage of scenes from around the world, loosely connected by the theme of the circle of live
Wittenberg
15-02-2018
Easy
It's a marathon of non-stop pretty wallpapers for your desktop. There's no mistaking the outstanding visuals and suitable music, but simply sticking it together also felt like an easy win. Perhaps some more courage or risks would have helped.The Silence
When man-eating bats are released from an ancient cave, only those who can live in silence stand a chance
Wittenberg
05-05-2019
Does what it needs to, but not much more
It sort of does what you expect in a tidy and effective way, to deliver a respectable suspense horror. But so shortly after the superior 'a Quite Place' it came across as a bit tame and second rate.She Will
Older moviestar and her nurse go to a secluded place to recover, but the spirit of witchcraft still lingers there
Wittenberg
12-03-2023
Great atmosphere, lacking story
It laid down a promising groundwork for a modern witchcraft tale, but I felt it ran out of ideas and became a somewhat uneventful movie not really going anywhere, and without a satisfying ending.After Yang
A man tries to get his broken droid and familymember fixed, and finds out a deeper level in it than he realized
Wittenberg
08-11-2023
Atmospheric but ultimately too thin
Saturated with a mellow and melancholic atmosphere that almost gets you in a dreamy state as well. I appreciative how it's more of a wandering, soul-searching sort of poetry than a clear-cut story, but ultimately I found it too thin on substance to make a lasting impression.Blair Witch (2016)
Armed with 7 million camera's, a brother sets of to find his sister who disappeard in the cursed woods
Wittenberg
09-07-2017
The formula is still scary, but you start to look through it
This felt scary but over-familiar, and the realism achieved by the found footage started to feel very unrealistic instead. I mean who the hell carries this many cameras and shoots this much at these insane moment? Kudos though, for some of the actors enacting deep deep fear in the finale.Extracted
A machine provides a man access to the memories of a criminal, but he gets stuck in there too
Wittenberg
28-06-2015
Great idea, somewhat dull
A swell idea that oozes potential. Execution however, is rather slow, simplistic and tame, so it does not quite reach the skies. Too bad. More ideas like this one though, please.Cosmopolis
During his limo ride to get a haircut, a wealthy financial has conversations (?) with people he meets along the way.
Wittenberg
12-01-2014
Mindbending by chit chat
I was mad at this movie, for its pretentious, incomprehensible and endless bull (or poetry, you decide). I think I fell asleep twice. Then, the next day, I couldn't wait to see how it ended. It's a mindfuck alright.Aporia
A widow gets her husband back by using her friend's machine that perhaps failed at time travel, but can kill a person in the past
Wittenberg
01-10-2023
Slowish and sober, but still a worthwhile time puzzler
I am quite a sucker for these sober, intimate, low-budget movies that still deliver a clever story and time travel puzzles. This one did indeed fall into that category, although it was a bit lackadaisical and perhaps too minimalistic.Cruela
How Cruela de Vil, you know the villain from 101 dalmatians, came to be
Wittenberg
03-10-2021
Well made, just not much in here for me personally
This was received well and praised highly, and I can see the well made and well told story in it. Personally, I was hoping for it to be a bit more vile, more shock, more magic and a lot less about fashion. It has a bit of a happy musical vibe that is not my cup of tea.The Equalizer
Highly skilled, ultra meticulate (ex-cia?) must come to action once again when he infuriates Russian mobsters by caring for a hooker
Wittenberg
27-04-2015
Old fashioned (in a bad way)
A movie that is trying too hard to be bad-ass, yet it is too long, delivers quite mediocre cat and mouse action and a dull take-them-out-one-by-one-in-a-warehouse finale reminiscent of 80's action movies.Rim of the World
Stereotype kids on a summercamp become friends as the try to stop an alien invasion
Wittenberg
07-12-2019
Not without problems, but ultimately entertaining enough
People rightfully pointed out the tired stereotype kids and cliche events. I'd add the unnatural jumps in the editing and uncomfortable adult jokes that make it unclear who this movie is for. But despite all this, it still did amuse me and my kids as the children adventure it mostly sets out to be.Movies found: 1043 | max movies per page: 50 | Showing: 261 - 310
Previous Next