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Bone Tomahawk

Cowboys go on a mission to rescue fellow-cowboys who were kidnapped by brutal Indians

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-05-2023
7

Served straight up, which is both good and bad

I was lured into this reading somewhere that it was a cross between western and horror. Wrongly so, because it really is a western with perhaps some gore at the end. It was okay; very linear, straightforward story with no window dressing. This made it pure and natural, but not really exciting.
7

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace

In a mission to save a planet from a hostile takover, two jedi stumble across a boy with great promise.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-09-2013
7

Majestic saga lost in space

It had everything you could possibly wish for: spaceships, droids, lightsabers, jedi's, aliens and saga. It has a phenomenal pod race. But because of multiple factors, it is a somewhat dull experience.
7

Shadow in the Cloud

A young women with a top secret cargo rides a long an all-male bomber mission - that is being attack by strange things...

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-07-2021
7

The individual parts are not all that, but as a whole it works

It's quite easy to point out several flaws in it, especially the first half with the endless intercom chatter. But the atmosphere is unique, and pointing out the unrealistic scenes somehow seems irrelevant, as these seem like metaphors for the struggle for womanhood in a male world.
7

No One Will Save You

A girl versus aliens invading her home

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-03-2024
7

Mostly a decent home invasion movie

I liked the idea of a single, cute girl in a dress facing such dreadful odds, and it certainly has some strong scenes and moments. After a while though, I thought it became a bit directionless, and the surreal dreamy ending felt slapped on without really knowing what it was supposed to mean.
7

Kill List

Ex military (?) but now homebound man accepts a hitjob, but it drags him into an occult nigtmare

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-03-2022
7

A mood different than others, but lacks involvement

There's a plain, non-sensationalist vibe in the atmosphere and acting, which I liked and which sets the movie apart. The builtup and climax are also shocking enough. But making the main character is such a nasty, hollow, emotionless man works against the movie and the impact it could have had.
7

UFO

Talented math student gets obsessed with a brief UFO sighting. Not only to find out about their intentions, but also the coverup surrounding it.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-02-2019
7

Intriguing little UFO tale

I was sort of waiting for a movie like this. Make the UFO secondary, and focus on what it does to people. This one sort of does that, and I was quite amused by it and liked the central role of mathematics. It can feel a bit low budget at times, but overall: yeh, a smart and nice surprise.
7

Triple 9

Corrupt agents doing one more gig get caught up in a swamp of distrust

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-12-2016
7

Gloomy and effective but not very involving

It's good to see some dark, well-acted, sweaty, and straight up bad cop action again, with effective action/violence because it doesn't want to over dramatize or orchestrate anything. It would have helped though, if we knew a little bit more about these guys so we can sympathize a little better.
7

Beavis and Butt-Head Do the Universe

They get mistaken for drilling talents and are sent into space, causing havoc across space and it's dimensions

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
01-08-2022
7

If you needed more of it, then this delivers

I for one missed these guys, and this movie simply delivers a generous portion of everything you love and hate about them, wrapped in a story that's reasonably fresh without ever drifting away from the essence.
7

Inside

Art burgar gets trapped inside a house for a long time, and needs to find ways to survive (and possibly escape)

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
17-04-2023
7

Quite a unique survival movie

Indoor survival, what an idea! It's all executed perfectly fine, and Dafoe manages to not overdo the gradually increasing frustration and insanity. Nothing mind-blowing here, but it's a worthwhile and refreshingly different movie for sure.
7

Cure

Detective investigates murders that appear to have come through hypnosis

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
29-12-2023
7

Moody but a bit too emtpy

With it's moody, grainy colors and images, and continuous dread of the unexplained, this had the potential for being quite an intense, under-your-skin thriller/horror. But unfortunately, the slowish plot and an overall empty feeling ment some of the scares were lost.
7

Campaign, The

Cocky congressman suddenly faces competition from an unlikely candidate in the elections

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-03-2014
7

Nice, but could have used a smarter story

Funny and witty spoof of contemporary politics, that's probably not far from the truth either. Slightly let down by a simplistic and predictable story.
7

Them That Follow

A woman of a secluded religious community, that does snake handling to prove their faith, has a secret

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-12-2021
7

Slow, but something is growing

The movie has a very serene atmosphere in which the slow daily life in the woods is portrayed very well, so much so that in fact halfway I almost started to long for some action. But there's a constant under the skin buzz that keeps it mysterious and kept me watching, with memorable performances.
7

Insidious

Family moves into a home, soonafter which paranormal things happen and the boy falls into a chronic sleep (but it's not a coma!)

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-06-2016
7

Half great, half ok

Starts of terrifying indeed. But then the inevitable ghost expert team moves in and sort of break the tension with misguided humor, along with the cliched medium and a tacky explanation for it all, and it sort of drifts into a slightly messy Poltergeist clone.
7

Love and Monsters

A monster apocalypse forces people to live underground. One not so brave dude decides to travel over te surface to reunite with the love

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
21-05-2021
7

Layed-back but amusing monster film

I found it to be a bit slow-ish and perhaps lacking some real suspense, but overall there is a nice, friendly atmosphere, a good sense of adventure and some well done monster brawls. Suitable for a younger audience without being childish.
7

Snowpiercer

Survivors of a frozen world found shelter on a selfsupporting train, driving endlessly circles. But a war of classes rages.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-08-2014
7

Interesting

At first I was put off by the cliched revolt of lowerclass people in dirty clothes and low lighting conditions. But as they fight their way to the higher class front of the train, color comes in literally and figuratively, bringing to live this interesting metaphor of real live society.
7

We Are the Flesh

In an apocalyptic ruin, siblings mingle with a man offering them perks, but also descending them into nightmarish sexual depravity

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-02-2022
7

A trip for some of us

Perhaps it is not fair to rate this without having had subtitles, but I doubt it would have made more sense with them. Being uncomfortable, strange and vile, it's hard to rate movies like this. But in the end,I think I appreciate the vision, the boldness and the tripyness about it.
7

Last Days on Mars, The

Mars mission is about to wrap up, when they find something in the rocks....

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
23-11-2013
7

So close to being great

This would have been a bomb if it had a more original, imaginative story. Now it's just a good, quite scary and beautiful looking movie.
7

Earth to Echo

Distortions on telephones lead a group of friends to an extraordinary discovery, keeping them busy all night

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-12-2014
7

The kids deliver

Not sure it needed those shaky camera shots, on top of an already restless story that is literally allover the place. Mostly though, this is a highly sympathetic, nicely done scifi adventure which radiates the same positive energy as E.T. and Super 8.
7

Ju-on: White Ghost

When a family moves into a haunted house, the man is cursed to do the unthinkable onto his family and then himself

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
19-06-2022
7

Simple but effective

It is told in a somewhat plain and unimaginative way, and for the most part feels like a collage of mini story's leading to a jump-scare. But the pieces do come together, and the movie did work. It has a uncanny atmosphere without being hysteric about it, and the scares came through alright.
7

Killers of the Flower Moon

A tribe of Indians, wealthy because of the oil on their land, is overcome by of a plague of murders

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
29-11-2023
7

Oscar material and it knows it

A slew of triple A actors are seemingly competing for who has the most acting prowess, almost up to the point of overacting. The story is one of those 'little known story that needs to be told' affairs. Undoubtedly a good movie - but there is something very self conscious and Oscar hungry about it.
7

Exodus Gods and Kings

The story of Moses, who sets out to free his people from egyptian oppression, with a little help from divine intervention

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
19-04-2015
7

Good yet linear and flat

Well made, acted and tightly shot, it is let by a very slow middle section, a failure to evoke deeper emotions and a rather uninspired depiction of the plagues, as if they are checking them out on a list; Yeh ok so that's the frogs, what's next? How many more?
7

Isn't it Romantic

no-life woman bumbs her head and wakes up in a Romatic Comedy

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
08-04-2019
7

I just wish it was nastier

It's a great idea that will yield a few laughs. But ironically, it's not really funnier than the movies it is making fun of, and even comes up with the very moral lesson I thought it was revolting against.
7

Osmosis

Futuristic clinic develops an implant that will help people find their soulmate. But there are plenty of problems as the grand opening comes closer.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-03-2023
7

An original but sterile scifi drama

These series score with originality, a gloomy atmosphere and a couple of interesting storylines. However, the scenery, characters and atmosphere are so ice-cold and sterile that it is hard to empathize any with it - nor did I find everything very logical.
7

Sightseers

A rather daft couple goes on a dopey UK trip, which gradually turns into a Bonnie and Clyde rampage through the countryside

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
06-12-2015
7

Unique, uncomfortably funny

An oddball movie with a strange but ultimately successful combination of comedy, violence and utterly boring vacation trips.
7

Dante's Inferno

Animation about Dante who ventures into hell to get back his wife

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-10-2020
7

Nice hell

The movie delivers quite chilling and imaginative visions of hell, and the biblical and historical references give it intelligence and depth. However [SPOILER], the fact the Dante just hacks his way through any and all kinds of demons without ever getting into real trouble means it lacked tension.
7

Ruins, The

A group of beautiful people goes to a secluded mayan ruin, where doom awaits

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-10-2023
7

A pretty good and pretty original horror

This movie manages to overcome my allergy of horror movies with those witty, young, beautiful perfect people, and delivers a pretty solid and entertaining watch, with some gore, mystery and reasonably fresh ideas. I loved the mimicry concept in here.
7

LEGO Batman Movie, The

Batman must not only face the usual enemies (all at once), but also his inner self

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
19-02-2017
7

Too fast and furious

A colorful blast of action and endless jokes. Maybe I am getting old, but I found everything too fast and insanely frantic, making it impossible to follow and keep up. The few moments of silence (mostly also intended as a joke) felt like I could breathe again.
7

Glorious

Broken man takes a stop during a car trip, but gets locked in the restroom with a god occupying one of the stalls

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-08-2022
7

Refreshingly mad

While it may have some trouble keeping the simple setup engaging the whole time, I did find that this is a wonderfully crazy and refreshing flick. It has a nice dash of horror and scifi elements, but is mostly suitable for those seeking something absurd and trippy.
7

Crimson Peak

Woman marries a man who brings her to his spooky mansion, where she finds out what a ghost in her childhood tried to warn her for

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-04-2016
7

The good bits are mostly a side dish

With almost every scene a piece of art, this is quiet a looker. The ghost scenes were great too. But the story holding it together is mostly a costume drama of love, crime and passion, which I found quite slow and pale by comparison. I really liked Jessica Chastain's performance, though
7

Avengers, The

Team of superhero's must save earth from an evil god with evil plans

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-09-2013
7

Too super

A good-looking fun ride which radiates positive energy. But gees, with so many superpowers combined, a truly exciting confrontation with evil is out of the equation. It's also too plain silly to be really exciting.
7

De Slag om de Schelde

On how the allies regained control of the Dutch Schelde during world war 2, a crucial supply route to Antwerpen harbour

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
01-07-2021
7

Decent for sure, but somehow didn't really land

I quite like how it is built around more personal and intimate stories of several people involved, and was impressed by the glider footage. However, it suffers a bit from the "we have just a few sets and locations" sensation of smallness, and somehow it didn't really pack a punch emotionally.
7

Das Signal

An astronaut dissappears mysteriously after returning to earth. Her husband slowly learns what she discovered in space.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-03-2024
7

A pleasant scif mystery

An amusing scifi thriller with a pleasant mellow atmosphere and enough question marks too keep you attached. Through it's fanatic attempts to deliver unexpected twist, it did become rather far fetched and illogical at times.
7

Vanishing Waves

Science team tries to save a comatose patient by connecting her brain with that of a a healthy subject.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-09-2014
7

Kills it's darlings

Much to my regret, this movie kills most it's wonderful, imaginative and tasteful scenes, by endlessly dwelling in them. The unprofessional and unlikely science guy and his motivations are also a dissonant I wished they had left out. Too bad, as this had potential for becoming a mesmerizing gem.
7

John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum

Because he broke some rules, John is now declared outlaw and the entire underworld seems to be after him.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
16-08-2020
7

The core of the franchise

The story serves as a carrier to deliver oodles of John Wick-style fights and not much else. It can be a bit too much and absurd at times, but I must say there is also something mesmerizing and satisfying about these endless, beautifully choreographed, flowing violent dances of death.
7

Lego Movie 2: The Second Part, The

Our lego friends venture into strange new worlds so there can be peace between two lego realms

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
07-08-2019
7

More of the same

I could see all the things I loved about the original, yet I felt a bit indifferent about it without knowing exactly why. I guess it really is more of the same, which - even if that means more of a good thing - means the initial excitement is not here. But hey: it's still a dazzling lego movie!
7

Blue Jasmine

Woman becomes emotionally unstable after her wealthy, cheating and fraudulent husband goes to prison, but tries to get on with her life anyway

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
17-03-2014
7

Typical Woody Allen movie?

I heard rumours that some Woody Allen movies are actually not that bad. This certainly is a movie aimed at character building and slow story telling, but nevertheless kept me interested till the last scene. Eventually, I even felt sorry for the main character, played by Cate Blanchett.
7

Mitchells vs. the Machines, The

Chaotic family faces a robot invasion as well as the struggles with each other

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-05-2021
7

Frantic fun

A bubbly and perky move that is good for a few laughs. It is really up to date with internet fun, memes and mobile phone lifestyle (So it will be obsolete a few years from now). Like other Sony movies, such as Hotel Transylvania, it is very fast and hysteric, sometimes tiring me down.
7

Spawn

Killed assassin makes a deal with the devil to lead his army with new superpowers, and in return he may see his wife again

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-10-2017
7

Not brilliant, but has plenty of tricks to make it work

People weren't to keen on this comic adaptation, but I am quite ok with it. There's a special kind overacting that seems just right for a movie like this, I liked the dark theme and some of the fx, the clown is just awesome and the movie simply entertains.
7

Afflicted

While documenting a Eurotrip, two friends also document one of them turning into a vampire

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
18-08-2015
7

More interesting than scary

A combination of natural acting and convincing effects create some effective WTF moments. Well done, but it wasn't really scary - mostly because they seem sort of ok with the transformation.
7

Ghost in the Shell: SAC_2045


Wittenberg
Wittenberg
19-07-2020
7

More clean and comprehensible, but at the cost of atmosphere

I enjoyed another round of the adventures of this fabulous team. There is plenty of cool stuff in there, and I could actually follow the story this time. The graphics however, while crisp and clear, are also a bit lifeless, and the major somehow lost her mojo for me - even if she is an android.
7

Grotesque (2009)

A young couple is taken hostage and submitted to grotesque torture. Yeh, that's pretty much the story.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-08-2023
7

Ultrapainful and hard to watch, with no payoff or clue to any of it

I was never drawn to torture movies, and by God I hope this is the most painful one in existence. I am giving this 7 points for it is not necessarily badly made, it managed to rattle me inside, made me look away and almost made me give up entirely. But that does not mean I recommend viewing it.
7

Crimes of the Future

In a painless future, a couple performs live operations as an artform and are asked to operate a very special case. He also has strange new organs growing inside of him, by the way.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
15-06-2022
7

Appealing forbidden fruit, but did not fill me up

I dig this strange word, including the body horror and filth, simply as break from the mainstream. But I did not find it really engaging. Perhaps because we are simply thrown into the weirdness without a narrative, but more importantly the characters themselves seemed apathetic about it too.
7

Seeking a friend for the end of the world

With a few days remaining before a world apocalypse, two people go on a roadtrip to pursue their last wishes.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-02-2013
7

The end of the world should have been nicer

Good to see people preparing for the end of the world in a reasonably calm and peaceful fashion for once. Starts of great, but then sort of loses it's pace and is neither witty or dramatic enough to really keep interest. I couldn't really attach to either of the main characters or their supposed relationship.
7

Paranormal Activity 2

(mostly) securitycamera footage of a family being haunted

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-01-2016
7

Novel en successful idea approach to a horror flick

Probably a rehash of part 1, but since I have not yet seen that, I will honor this one for the brave, effective and chilling way of telling a horror story. The actual events and pacing are a bit under powered for it to become truly terrifying, though.
7

Veronica

Ouija board. Trouble.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-08-2018
7

Familair but with it's own sauce

Story wise it is familiar material, but the scares are quite subtle and less hysteric than usual. I liked the Spanish vibe on this and especially the three kids were great. But why it's hailed as one of the scariest movies ever made, I have no idea. The music sounds outdated and isn't helping.
7

Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022)

Folks buy an old town to turn it into something hip, but one house still contains the freaky villain from the seventies

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-05-2023
7

Succesful slasher

While I suspect fans of the original have plenty to complain about, in itself I found this to be a fairly solid slasher movie. It has some good gore, and the tension in some scenes is well done and certainly above average.
7

Pacific Rim

To combat giant monsters from the sea, mankind built equally giant robots. Really GIANT.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-08-2013
7

Also a ferocious battle between great CGI and a great movie

Even a spectacle of this caliber, with such magnificent visuals, still would need a better story and characters to leave a lasting impression and score higher. But the dumb 'n fun factor sort of works here.
7

Fountain, The

While trying to find a cure for his terminally ill wive, a man gets entangled in her manuscript for a story. Also, he is flying through space in a bubble with a tree.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-06-2016
7

Over aware of it's uniqueness

A courageous and unique movie that dares to be different and strange. Beautiful and meaningful on the one hand, but hardly subtle as the symbolism is sort of rammed damned your throat and feels slightly too pleased with itself.
7

Wonder, The

In the begining of the 19th century, a nurse is tasked with observing a girl who appearantly is able to live without eating

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
23-12-2022
7

A sober and intriguing tale

This movie is at times very good looking - some of the indoor shots look like paintings - which help to set the mysterious mood. The story is intriguing enough. Part of me likes the fact that they kept it simple, fitting with the lives portrayed, another part wishes it had an extra layer or twist.
7

Last Stand, The

Sherrif spents his last working days in a quite bordertown near Mexico, until an escaped criminal plans his escape route straight to it.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-10-2013
7

Solid

A somewhat uncomfortable mix of blood spills and goofy humor degrade this otherwise solid and gun fun action movie.
7

X-Men: Days of Future Past

Sentinels threaten the existence of the mutants, so they sent Wolverine back in time to prevent them from ever being built. Sort of like that one movie.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-10-2014
7

Freaks!

Smooth, sparkling and good looking entertainment. But these mutants and their adventures are stereotypes by definition, that won't lock in emotionally. I also thought Wolverine was out of place as the sensible mediator trying to get people to change their ways.
7

G.I. Joe: Retaliation

When almost all GI Joe's are taken out, it's up to the remaining 3 Joe's to save he world and restore the team.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-01-2014
7

Succesfull action silliness for adults

Sure it's over the top silly. But there's something right about this movie. It doesn't claim to be more than it is, some of the action is just plain cool, and it has the right amount of violence and gloominess to prevent you from feeling like you're watching PowerRangers.
7

Non Stop

Air marshall tries to deal with a terrorist threatening to kill the passages on his flight, getting himself framed in the process
average 7.0

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
17-09-2015
7

Over the top in a nice way

I don't buy many aspects of the story, but I enjoyed it anyway!
7

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
24-02-2015
7

Good old fashioned suspense

An reasonably intense thriller with a constantly high adrenaline level, and a pleasant 'old fashioned' simplicity of execution. Near the end they go a little overboard with the whodunnit game, and the far fetched motives and plans of the terrorist are yeh-right.
7

Terminator 3 Rise of the Machines

Again, a terminator comes back in time to secure the future. Again, he is hunted down by an advanced terminator model

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
11-05-2014
7

A lesser but stilll adequate episode

Not as epic and overwhelming as the preceding parts, in part because of the rather dull main characters. Still, there's plenty of Terminator goodness in here to have a good time. Average actionmovies back then still were more fun than the soulless fx bonanzas we get nowadays.
7

November Man, The

Retired CIA top wonderboy is asked for one more gig. He steps in because someone close to him is involved...

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-05-2015
7

Fine espionage

A decent, classic espionage action flick. It is a bit low on standout moments though, and the cockiness and skills of the main character can be too much at times.
7

Banquet, A

A mother tries to handle a daugther who, after a visit to the woods, no longer eats and feels she now has a higher purpose

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
21-03-2022
7

A modest horror with it's own style, but a bit thin on substance

This is a nice, modest mystery with a dash of horror but nothing hysteric. The atmosphere is moody and the central theme of eating and food is lain out well. However, it is dangerously close to being rather uneventful, and can feel kind of improvised as it tries to reach the end.
7

Cobweb

Boy with shit parents and no friends hears a voice coming from the walls, reaching out to him...

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-09-2023
7

Something borrowed, something new

Although it uses some familiar ideas and scares, it also manages to have a story and atmosphere of it's own. Nothing spectaculair perhaps, but certainly a well rounded package and decent horror at that.
7

Aquaman

The story of sea-based superhero aquaman, and his quest to stop an all-out war with the dry people

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
06-08-2019
7

Sympathetic, fun and over the top

Like many superhero movies, it gets a bit too much and over the top as it moves towards the end (drum playing octopus did it for me) But I must say this has a heart at the right place, Aquaman and others were very likable, and overall it's an unpretentious fun adventure I enjoyed.
7

Endless, The

Two brothers go back to a 'ufo death cult' they broke free from in the past. Strangeness awaits.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-04-2023
7

Decent, but left a slighly unfinished feeling

Without overreaching within a limited budget, this manages to setup quiet a modest but enticing story and mood to make you curious. It can be a bit sluggish though and, while I find the open ended nature fitting, it did feel like it was a a bit insecure about it's own plot and meaning.
7

I Spit on Your Grave

Girl survives a brutal redneck gang rape and comes back to torture them to death

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-02-2016
7

A heavy, deeply uncomfortable, depressing affair.

If you manage to finally make it through the rape scenes, the next endurance test is full frontal torture, slightly more bearable because of the payback. I thought the complicated torture setups deployed seemed overly elaborate, prone to errors. But how can we rate movies like this? A 7 perhaps?
7

Marebito

A lonesome filmaker descents into the catacombs of the city and finds an alienated girl whom he tries to care for

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-12-2023
7

Strong beginning, medium remainders

I liked the beginning the best, as it is quite creepy and unnerving. After that, it looses this and switches to mystery/drama that I found less compelling but quite interesting nonetheless. I read about all sorts of double meanings you could attribute to this movie, but for me it is what it is.
7

Discovery, The

When an afterlife is scientifically proven, suicide becomes rampant because people try to get there

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-06-2017
7

Not all I hoped, bit I still liked it

Part of me wished it was more about the discovery itself, part of me wished it was deeper en creepier, but the rest of me was quite pleased with the sober, depressing and character based-approach that still manages to intrigue and serve a satisfying climax.
7

Unwelcome

After a home invasion, a young couple moves to the countryside. But new dangers await there, too.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-02-2024
7

A unique but tasty cocktail

A remarkable mix of (hard-hitting) home invasion, fairytale folklore horror and perhaps even contemplations about manhood. Even the tone varies from scene to scene. But all in all, it sort of worked. Not a masterpiece, but highly amusing and quite intense at times.
7

Ninjago

The green ninja is having daddy issues, so he and his team venture into the jungle to find the ultimate ultimate weapon to defeat him

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
11-10-2017
7

Unbalanced

These LEGO movies will deliver the frantic action and fun, but I found it an unbalanced with a restless first half and then too much over-emotional scenes in the second one. But who am I? My son rated it 9.5.
7

Rosemary's Baby

Rosemary and her husband move into a luxury appartment where she gets pregnant. The friendly but nosy neighbours hold dark secrets

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-08-2023
7

Good, but may have lost the effect it once had

I'd be happy to acknowledge the impact that this slowly unfolding and psychological horror must have had back in the days, and I quite enjoyed it as well. But in the now, I found the bigger part of it very chatty and the climax barely making up for it.
7

Hallow, The

A couple movies to a secluded house in Ireland for forest research, but awaken the stuff from local folklore lurking in the woods

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-06-2022
7

A fine horror that manages to set itself apart

Although it does not offer anything radically new - but which horror does - the intimate atmosphere, the genuine characters and a tendency towards true tension over cheap jump scares (of which there are some), make it a worthwhile little horror. But geez, go easy on the cute baby sounds.
7

Tokyo Gore Police

A special police officer is on an assigment to take care evil modified humans, which involves a lot of bloodshed

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
23-03-2023
7

Entertaining blood fountains

For the most part I was very entertained by the bizarre atmosphere and blood fountains. It's a nice doze of insanity that is so over the top you can enjoy without remorse. After a while though, it did get a bit pointless and clueless.
7

Polar

A hitman's pension doesn't go as planned

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-11-2020
7

Original, funky and violent

A mixture of some pretty grim action and violence with 'hip' characters, music and wacky titles. For a moment I was afraid the latter was a mask to hide mediocrity, but I have the say Mikkelsen's oodles of charisma, as well as a decent plot twist at the end, make it rise above the norm.
7

12 years a slave

Another movie on slavery

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
29-01-2014
7

An African American living in New york is kidnapped and sold as slave

Based on a true story addressing the gruesome consequences of slavery in the southern states of mid 19th century America. Although I can appreciate this movie and the message it portrays, there are other movies on this topic that I find more memorable.
7

Extermination

Family tries to survive an invasion from outer space and learn something about themselves along the way

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
02-08-2018
7

Very decent scifi with a nice twist

All in all this was quite classy and stylistic most of the time, and it has a satisfactory twist as well. It does, however, dwell in certain scenes, and features some horrible cliches like a little girl risking everyone's lives to get her teddybear. Ugh.
7

Typewriter

Family movies into a new home with a cursed, but sought after, typewriter in it

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
24-11-2019
7

mixed

It mixes a lot of themes with varying levels of success. There's horror, but also humor, mystery and sometimes it's almost a children's movie. Likewise it is mixed in quality. Sometimes creative and intense, but quite slow and a bit dorky at others. But it does have a unique vibe that sets it apart.
7

Side effects

After prescribing one betablocker too many, things go bad for both the psyhiatrist and the patient.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-08-2013
7

Far-fetched plots also have side effects

Good, but as the story becomes more and more unbelievable, your involvement in this movie wears off.
7

What We Do in the Shadows

Mockumentary about group of vampires trying to get by in daily life

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-07-2015
7

Funny and unique

A sassy movie with a nice sense of humor a great atmosphere. Could have used some killer jokes though.
7

Red Turtle, The

Adult animation about a man stranded on an island, and his attempts to escape appearantly being blocked by a large turtle.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-04-2020
7

Beautiful and intriguing animation

Drawn in a beautiful minimalist but expressive style, tastefully flavored with some supernatural elements and manages to make you curious even if nothing is being said. That's quite something, even if the open ended nature felt a little easy to me.
7

Greenland

With comets heading for earth, a family tries to make their way to a shelter

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-07-2021
7

Decent, restrained disaster

While it doesn't set out new frontiers in disaster movies, I thought it was a pretty good one. It kept us hooked, it doesn't have overly complicated stunts and escapes, and it conveys a message that is such situations, the comets are hardly the biggest problem.
7

Pi

A man obsessed with numbers looses his mind where he tries to find patterns in both the stock exchange and the Tora

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
08-04-2024
7

A pleasant fix of gloomy weirdness

I wonder if it's just because of the black and white that it reminded me of Eraserhead? Or was it also the sweaty claustrophobic cinematography, the insanity and otherworldlyness of it all? Who knows. It's a cult niche thing, but a worthy one for sure.
7

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword

One man can claim the magic sword and challenge the evil king

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-01-2018
7

Watch out for splinters

At times a majestic and grandiose movie that definitely has it's moments, but also has some distracting dissonants like the weird fast paced conversations and inconsistent character of Arthur himself. Sometimes he was sincere, sometimes a goofball. It failed to latch on, already I am forgetting it.
7

Hunter Killer

American submarine is sent to rescue the Russian president... without starting a world war

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-03-2019
7

Decent macho stuff

It tries a little too hard to be macho and has everyone talking in super tough guy one liners... all at the expense of realism and true tension. But what's left is still an entertaining, action-packed submarine movie for us to jerk off to the glorious American military.
7

Into the Heart of the Sea

The 'true' story of Moby Dick, of whale hunters becoming hunted by a whale

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-04-2016
7

Well made but not engaging enough

It has a nice look and feel to it, and it was clearly made with much love and dedication. But these grumpy and dirty men harpooning whales were hardly sympathetic, so their misfortune was hardly engaging. The thick arty layers of unnatural colors take away a sense or realism too.
7

Brain Dead / Dead Alive

An exotic rat bite turn the dead into zombies. An dorky man and his girlfriend fight them with all their might.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-08-2017
7

A classic, but has lost some impact over the years

It reached new levels of splatter-gore when it came out, and it still is quite a bloodbath today. The humorous tone helps to make the somewhat campy effects acceptable, but prevents it from becoming really scary or gross.
7

Malignant

After the brutal death of her husband, a woman starts to experience equally brutal murders in other people's homes

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
02-01-2022
7

Uninspired horror saved by a pretty cool twist

For the first half I was just sad, fearing that James Wan has nothing more to offer than formulaic cliches and boring movie characters. And while this IS a big problem of this movie, I have to say the reveal/plot twist was great, put things on it's head and managed to redeem some of the movie.
7

Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities

A bunch of horror stories

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
29-01-2023
7

Fun, not terrifying, dark tales for adults

While some of these stories can get quite gruesome - there's a lot of full frontal decaying corpses - the overall atmosphere is more akin towards mystery and dark fairy tales for adults, in terms of style and music. Two I found rather weak, but rest of them quite enjoyable.
7

Gun Woman

A crippled man turns a meth woman into an assassin to avenge his past. Now - where to hide to gun?

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-09-2015
7

A bizarre and painfull plan. But will it work?

A rather sad movie with a lot of blood, suffering and necrophilia that provides an uncomfortable watch. The gun woman, however, does manage to drag you into the story, and make you anxious to see whether it all works out as planned.
7

Dive, The

Two sister go on a dive at a remote site. One of them gets stuck.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
17-09-2023
7

Pretty and suspenseful

For a while I was skeptical whether I would care enough about these girls, or seeing them struggle around the single plotpoint for an entire movie. Turns out I did. It looks great and becomes quite a nail biter indeed. It's also quite savvy about diving equipment and procedures, adding to realism.
7

Nekromantik

Couple has a fascination for collecting bodyparts, but when he brings an entire corps to have sex with, it puts their relationship to the test

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
29-07-2022
7

Unpleasant but enticing curiosity

It is made poorly and looks amateuristic, but the sight of someone licking the eye-socket of a decayed corpse still makes this have an impact way bigger than it's budget would have you believe. Vile and uncomfortable, but also unique, brave and an interesting niche product to have experienced. Once.
7

Lifeforce

Space mission takes samples from inside a mysterious space derelict, but brings home terror doing so. Space vampires, no less!

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
06-08-2019
7

Entertaining mix of nonsense

Back from when actors were ugly and sweaty, and people were interrogated by slapping them in the face, comes this remarkable mix of scifi, horror, zombie-outbreak and soft erotica. And it's remarkably entertaining at that.
7

Alien: Covenant

A colonial spaceship decides to do an unscheduled stop at an unknown, potentially habitable, planet when they pick up broadcast from it

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-06-2017
7

Another great alien movie that is also a huge disappointment

It still manages to shock and awe with intense alien encounters en space tech porn. But the more it wants to elaborate on the story and origins of the creature, the more it destroys. I wish I had never seen a live engineer - the single dead one was 100x more intriguing.
7

Contracted

After a onenightstand, a woman's body starts decaying rapidly

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
06-11-2022
7

A decent little shocker

Overall, the woman's decay is shocking enough and wasn't overdone. Her struggle with it, and the oddly apathetic reaction of the people around her, adds to feeling of isolation and helplessness. The story is a little straightforward though, hardly going anywhere.
7

Anon

In a future where everyone's vision is recorded, interpreted and exchangable, a detective tries to solve a murder by a hacker

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
21-08-2021
7

Decent but cold future crime story

With some interesting tech and sober atmosphere, it has a decent film noire crime-story atmosphere going on. But everything and everyone is so lifeless and emotionless that it left me slightly cold as well. Everyone constantly checking their readouts makes it quite static and sluggish, too.
7

Overlord

A ww2 squad lands into German-occupied France to blow up a tower, but encounter dark occult nazi experiments on their way

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-05-2019
7

Meaty mix

A mixture of war, action and horror, delivering a meaty and enjoyable watch. It is, however, not super exciting nor super scary, and it is let down by some cliches and annoying characters, especially that damn kid.
7

Terminator, The

In the future, killer robotmachines rule, and send a terminator cyborg back to the presents prevent prevent the human rebellion leader from ever being born.
average 7.0

robocop
robocop
13-02-2013
5

Not bad for such a wuzz

It lacks soul like i have. In the end, it is human decision making that settles things.
5

Catwoman88
Catwoman88
01-02-2013
7

Could have been better meow

This movie needed more latex I could have privided, as well as more meow. Anywway this review is a bit on the long side for testing purposes.
7

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Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-01-2013
9

The definition of cyborg

This movie not only is still the final word in cyborgs, it also demonstrated how such a movie could be genuinly exciting and intellegent.
9

Marionette

Psychiatrist moves to Schotland after a trauma, but her new patient appears to be predicting the future with drawings

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-11-2020
7

slightly dull but ultimately satisfying

It's starts a bit pale in terms of colors, performances and pace, but certainly interesting enough to keep you aboard. Then it goes quite deep in terms of layers and plottwist, yielding a rewarding and fulfilling experience for sure.
7

Farm, The

Couple on a roadtrip ends up at a farm where they are treated like animals

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-11-2023
7

Unpleasantly piercing you conscience, but as a horroflick a bit thin

Seeing humans being treated like animals is quite a clever move, because it is shocking and vile, yet you can't fully condemn it because we treat animals this way too. It gives an unpleasant feeling. Too bad the move has little more to offer. Still, I suggest part II - the abattoir could be huge.
7

Chosen

Girl in a sleepy Danish town meets people who investigate the truth behind a comet that landed ther a long time ago

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
24-05-2023
7

A sweet mystery

You tend to get this Goonie's adventure vibe when youngsters go on a secret mission, and here we get Danish serenity on top of it. It's a sweet mystery, even if things can get quite unlikely at times, and the main character is not very likable. That space costume looked 70 years too late.
7

Stowaway

When a mars mission equiped for a crew of three has a crew of four

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-05-2021
7

Interesting and focussed, but a bit mellow

It brings down the story to the essence, features fine design and actors, and certainly had us entertained. But the big finale seems a bit cumbersome and unlikely, and part of me thought the impossible ethical decisions could have been more heart wrenching, and tension more nail-biting.
7

Guardians of the Galaxy

Bound by circumstance, a group of creatures sets out to prevent danger in the universe.
average 7.2

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
15-01-2016
7

Over the top science fiction action movie (in a good way)

A bit too much of everything, but somehow just right because of that!
7

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
22-08-2015
7.5

Take some time to let it sink in, and start enjoying

Not familiar with this comic, I feared I'd never get into this unexplained stream of weirdness. But the humor, vivid space combat action and sympathetic characters grew on me and left me quite entertained indeed.
7.5

Lone survivor, The

A mission in Afghanistan by American navy seals goes awfully wrong
average 7.2

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-02-2014
8

Okay these guys are tough

As these men are battered & bruised, smashed against rocks, cornered and shot, the increasing dread of death and hopelessness comes across very well. Intense movie that stuck for a while.
8

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
05-02-2014
6.5

Shoot 'em up between navy seals and taliban

Main part of the movie consists of Americans and Taliban chasing, shooting, injuring and killing eachother. Apparently a navy seal can sustain more injury than Iron Man ("is there a bullet in my head?"). Overall an okay movie for those of us not easily scared by bloody scenes.
6.5

Barbarian

When a girl arrives at her BnB, it is allready occupied. But that is just a prelude to the horror the house contains.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
18-12-2022
7.5

A tasty, fresh and creepy horror

A horror with a steady focus, that expertly cashes in on our native fear of dark hallways and is proud do things slightly different. I also like how they keep it fresh with introducing new characters and perspectives a couple of times throughout the movie.
7.5

Jacob's Ladder

War veteran starts seeing demons and jumps between alternate realities... what is going on?

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-07-2023
7.5

Dark and interesting

Not as horrific as I remembered it, but nevertheless a well done, interesting and gloomy thriller/drama about war trauma with satisfying depth.
7.5

3 Body Problem

When science appears to be broken, a group of scientists discover an amazing upcoming event causing it

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-04-2024
7.5

Not perfect, but loaded with plenty of scifi perks

There were quite a few elements that I found a bit of-putting - mainly that this world cataclysmic event only seemed to occupy a small group of befriended people - but this did not take away from the fact that it is a highly enjoyable specific epic, loaded with strange stuff and enticing mystery.
7.5

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