BoiledDown.netIf everyone's a critic, then so are we! |
USS Indianapolis: Men of Courage
This ship went on a secret mission to deliver the atomatic bomb, but was sunk on the way back, leaving the few survivors in hellish waters
Wittenberg
26-02-2017
Overreached
This movie's overblown ambitions of doing war, drama, survival, courtroom and romance contrast sharply with bad fx, uninspired screenplay, half-baked actors and dodgy editing. I was bored watching those men get eaten by sharks, which can't be right!Independence Daysaster
Aliens strike from above and below, smalltown folk (and president) scramble into action
Wittenberg
13-04-2014
Bad - but sympathetic and unpretentious
You B-movie you! With your continuous bombastic music blasting over shaky camera shots of people constantly jumping in and out a car! But it's sort of all right, it does what it can. Effects are sufficient. Fair game.Captain America: Civil War
All superhero's turn on each other for some reason
Wittenberg
11-11-2016
More boring and emotionless over the top stuff
In endless talking scenes, which made my son decide to watch something else, all sorts of story-lines from other movies are desperately and uninterestingly brought together. The battles are frantic but boring because noone ever gets hurt. And I still don't care about anyone.Monster Hunter
Army ranger accidently winds up in another dimension where she must fight monsters
Wittenberg
21-03-2021
Awesomeness that left me cold
Such a potential premise, such a big budget, yet still so uninteresting and shallow. I thought only the finale back on earth was somewhat badass. The movie seems to look a lot like the game it was based upon, so perhaps fans will get more out of it.Nightflyers
The crew on a spaceship, on it's way to make contact with alien lifeforms, finds itself in more and more peril as they come closer
Wittenberg
18-03-2019
These poor series still contain enough mystery to make it worthwhile
So for this monumentally important mission, they assembled the most insecure, insubordinate, fashion-conscious and unstable crew they could find and make them improvise the entire mission in an insanely incoherent way. But apparently I love space mystery so much that I still watched it. All of it.Last Full Measure, The
Pentagon hotshot reluctantly investigates a request for a posthumous medal of honor, and gets more and more involved as he talks to the veterans
Wittenberg
07-09-2020
Overdone
They managed to get a whole bunch a A-list actors giving all they got. But it feels overacted, over dramatized and forced down your throat. The clips during the end scroll demonstrate how veterans ACTUALLY talk. A noble cause for sure, but unnecessarily heavy-handed. Boring, even.Immanence
Scientists go on a boat to sea to investigate possible extraterrestial phenomena.. or is it divine phenomena?
Wittenberg
06-03-2022
The story was there, the rest was not
I usually dig science babble, but coming out of the mouths of these guys it sounded ridiculous. And while the story had potential, I am afraid the execution fell short in many other fields as well. Confusing and weird, in a bad way. Clearly not filmed on sea, disguised by pitch black surroundings.Moon 44
Pilot/cop goes undercover to a mining planet to oversee the convict pilots fighting of an alien invasion
Wittenberg
13-08-2023
A disappointing story in a cool scifi environment
The scenery, with it's dark and steamy hallways and spaceships, is remarkably like an Aliens, so that's good! The story though, is mostly convicts and and their navigators fighting, while the hero smokes cigarettes and tries to look cool - not really interesting.Forbidden World
Astronout lands on a base where an alien experiment get out of hand
Wittenberg
17-10-2021
Didn't turn out to be a classic
I watched this old nugget for some nostalgic quirks and perhaps hidden gems, but I am not sure I found them. Sure it has some remarkable nonsense and campy effects, but it's mostly just a bit crappy.Halo 4: forward unto dawn
Cadets getting trained for combat in the halo universe
Wittenberg
11-08-2013
Mission failed: please try again
What happened? They got great looking props, effects, a spot-on color palette, an exciting Halo playground, and even the warthog. Yet all they came up with are close-ups of whining and insubordinate teenagers, and a minimal story that's still going nowhere.Synchronicity
Small teams get a timemachine to run work, one of them gets caught up in paradoxes
Wittenberg
17-06-2018
The story is there. Execution is not.
There's probably a really clever, if not somewhat difficult to follow, story in here. But the really lackluster execution, dull performances, suspiciously limited locations and depressing dark colors made me struggle to care... no matter how much bladerunner music they throw in!jung_e
A team tries to create the ultimate warrior by recycling a brain into new cyborg bodies, but can't figure out why she keeps underperforming
Wittenberg
27-01-2023
Nothing much to make it work
A bit of a Korean take on Ghost in the Shell, this should interesting. But is is not. The action is utterly unconvincing, and I hated some of the characters who either over-acted or were just cringey and one-dimensional. The story attempts some quasi deep theme's but it all falls flat immediately.Hungerford
Some roomies/friends try to survice, after space visitors turn everyone into zombies. Good thing one of them was just doing a film project.
Wittenberg
13-11-2020
A minimal found-footage flick with annoying protagonist
I should sympathize with what they managed to create using very little resources, but it really was pretty basic zombie stuff. Some acted pretty good, some were ok, but the main character was a really annoying dude, and I started to despise his constant heavy breathing and drama.Fantastic Mr. Fox
Fox and friends engage in a war with local farmers when they steal chickens
Wittenberg
13-11-2021
Did not push my buttons
It looks and feels artistically sound and could please Roald Dahl fans. Personally, I found the puppets not very pleasant to look at and I don't like the storytelling much. It's not outstandingly funny, exciting or clever, I did not know how to process it and even got a bit strangely agitated.Resident Evil: The Final Chapter
With inside help, Alice gets a change to destroy the T-virus once and for all
Wittenberg
18-06-2017
Looks alright, feels numb
Much like the previous parts, this looks good and has some creative, vicious beasts on offer. But it also features the same hollow, boring screenplay and empty characters. It feels like a bunch of monster challenges glued together.Finest Hours, The
Against all odds, courageous men on a small coastguard boat sail into a storm to help the crew of a wrecked oiltanker
Wittenberg
17-07-2016
Sunk
Not withstanding the good looks and production values, I thought this was a mess. The 50's atmosphere felt cliched, all characters are either obnoxious, one-dimensional or off, the love story was getting on my nerves and I was sort of glad it was over.Firestarter (2022)
Girl tries to control and live with her ability to set things on fire, but evil people make her loose her cool
Wittenberg
05-06-2022
Left me cold (that punchline is probably taken)
One of those movies that, on the face of it, looks quite solid and adept, and makes you wonder why you're not enjoying it more. I think her parent's additional paranormal abilities get in the way of an already uninspired and even boring story that fails to ignite. (That's probably also taken.)Pacific Rim: Uprising
The monsters have been defeated, but not for long
Wittenberg
03-01-2019
Do you like robot fights?
Listen, I just came here for giant robots smashing huge monsters, and got what I wanted. Never mind that every person in this movie is a ridiculous Hollywood abomination and everything they say and do is stupid as can be, making this essentially a horrible Power Rangers movie with no soul.Reminiscence
When the future is bleak, people instead relive past memories with a machine. The operator running that facility gets involved when a femme fatale shows up
Wittenberg
06-12-2021
half decent idea failed
The opportunity to do something cunning with the central idea gets lost in dull, pseudo film-noir kitsch, and the plot twist comes way too late to redeem it. But the real problems are inexcusably crincy Hollywood dialogue, audience pampering, poorly choreographed fights, among others.Matrix 4: Resurrections, The
Neo, living in the matrix again as a guy who made a matrix game, goes back into the matrix to save Trinity, who is in the matrix.
Wittenberg
28-02-2022
This time, the mindbender is the movie itself
I am not sure how a 4th sequel could have worked or what I wanted from it, but surely it wasn't this. I hate the lazy self aware 'meta' approach and the revisiting of classic moments. Nothing really works anymore, I cringed multiple times. An odd misfire, which makes you wonder how this came to be.Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum
Found footage from a Korean ghost hunting documentaryteam, who get what they are looking for
Wittenberg
21-01-2024
Scares drowned in annoying team
There is a handful of chilling scenes near the end, but by that time I was too worn-down by the, once again, obnoxious team of selfcontent vloggers. I was getting really tired of the fullscreen close-ups of their sobbing faces, amidst a minimalistic and random story.Soul (2022), The
Prosecutor dying of cancer takes on a murder case that reveals dark secrets and transplants of more than just cells
Wittenberg
29-05-2022
Probably a brillant story but failed in presentation
I can appreciate the deep, well thought out story that stacks several layers of twists on each other, providing a real thinker of a crime story with perhaps a dash of horror. But it is presented so slowly en depressingly that I struggled to notice or care - and to stay awake too.Monuments Men, The
In WWII, a specialized group sets out to save artworks from destruction or being stolen by the nazis
Wittenberg
07-09-2014
A very boring movie
A moviesubject in danger of being boring. And despite the A-list of actors and undoubtedly good intentions, I am sorry to say that it is.Sex Ed
Mathteacher can't find a suitable job, so he settles for giving sex education to teens
Wittenberg
06-01-2015
Sex ought to be funnier than this
It had a lot going for it. A funny idea, a mellow Cuban vibe and potential. Unfortunately, the jokes won't ignite and many scenes just fall flat. Also contains a painfully misguided good-will-hunting-ish speech scene that isn't even trying to be funny.Godzilla: King of the Monsters
More huge titan monsters are awoken, and only Godzilla can restore the balance
Wittenberg
09-06-2019
Humans ruined earth AND this movie
Ruined by hollow, cringy and unfunny characters that speak exclusively in kitsch onelines and are monster experts, submarine commanders and anything else that comes their way. The monsters can't save it either, because, while fairly good looking, their fights are hard to follow and uninteresting.Echoes
A woman goes back to her hometown when her identical twin sister is missing, and then a lot of twin things happen
Wittenberg
23-10-2022
A good idea implemented rather plainly
To have a crime and mystery revolve around twin sisters, making you guessing who is who and who did what, is not a bad idea. But it is done rather unimaginatively, making me indifferent instead of intrigued, and is based on rather soapy themes like family feuds, relationships and horses.Evil Dead Rise
The book of the dead finds it way to a family living in an appartment
Wittenberg
05-06-2023
Uninspired and not scary enough
While it tried to be open minded about it, I did find a hard to have a true Evil Dead vibe without a cabin in the woods. More importantly though, this thing just wouldn't get scary for me, and even bored me at times. It's all a bit uninspired, and most of the characters I didn't care for much.walk among the tombstones, A
Private detective searching for a bunch of sickos mutilating and killing the loved ones of drug dealers
RockmeNow
24-07-2015
Another movie with Liam Neeson, definitely not one of his best
I am still wondering what the writers were thinking, as well as Liam Neeson reading the script. Watching a goldfish in a fish tank for 114 minutes must be more exciting than this...5th Wave, The
Girl tries to rescue her little brother amidst an alien invasion in 5 waves
Wittenberg
21-08-2016
Derailed
After a reasonable start, it derails in cheesy teenage love stories, unexciting screenplay, annoying army-squads comprising of teenagers and emo's, and sloppy movie making with aliens that conveniently look just like humans.Cellar, The
Family buys old house with an evil attic. I mean cellar.
Wittenberg
21-08-2022
A museum of horror cliches
There were some ideas that could potentially make this horror stand on it's own feet, and a handful of moments I liked. But for the vast majority of time this is smothered and glued together by a plethora of horrormovie cliches, as if they were checking them on a mandatory list.Brothers Grimsby, The
Lowlife british scumbag finds his long lost brother, and gets involved in his MI6 spy job along the way
Wittenberg
11-12-2016
Unprecentented vulgarities are not enough
Some of the scenes are so unbearably low and vulgar that in itself they could have given this movie some sort of cult status. Unfortunately, the lame action and humorless story surrounding is gets rid of that option.Silent Hill Revelation
Girl must save her father, who is trapped in a place full of demons
Wittenberg
08-09-2013
Not as scary as it looks
This contains some very moody scenery and genuinely nightmarish footage. But the girl's plan is basically walking from one demon challenge to the next, and the rest of the story is either boring or incomprehensible.Sweet Home
A group of very different people in an appartment building is faced with fighting monsters
Wittenberg
23-02-2021
The characters hit a nerve I did not know I had
The groundwork was promising; colorful cartoon-like imagery, pleasantly weird monsters and potentially interesting group dynamics. But none of the people is particularly likable. In fact I started to despise many of them up until the point I could no longer watch it. Never had this before.Dark Cloud
Traumatized girl gets experimental therapy by being secluded in a house run by an artificial intelligence
Wittenberg
31-07-2022
Too tedious and uneventful
The story is familiar, but one that always seems open for a new interpretation, and it's a story that can work just fine with limited budget like this movie. Unfortunate, this one failed. It is mostly tedious, slow and uneventful, and lacks the philosophical or technological wit to make it deep.OA, The
A missing blind girl one day returns with sight, and an amazing story about the afterlife she entrusts to a small group of people
Wittenberg
25-12-2023
Problematic, but the premise may pull you through
Another Netflix endeavor with a mysterious story that is only just able to make you watch the whole thing, but requires you to sit through excruciatingly slow passages and episodes, flat one-trick characters, many dubious plot-points and even some crinche here and there. The twist felt uninspired.Flatliners (2019)
Med students have themselves killed and take a peak at the afterlife before they are reanimated. But all is not fun and games.
Wittenberg
24-08-2019
Same problem as the original, executed worse
Like the original, the concept is awesome but I still find the clue rather dull and unsatisfying. Worse, in this version some of characters are quite annoying, some of their lines rather cheesy and the scares copied and uninspired. I was waiting for everyone to just say sorry and get this over with.Captain Marvel
A woman with superpowers and generic green aliens and avengers and tessaracts and whfff
Wittenberg
27-09-2020
I felt nothing
A cheerful, colorful, slick looking action superhero movie that went straight through me.Battle Royal
A class of students are placed on an island, and the game is that only one survives
Wittenberg
12-05-2022
A bloodfest turned into snoozefest
I was curious because it was listed somewhere as a real shocker, but the gore is not that bad - less so than many splatter horrors around. Furthermore I don't think I will ever get used to Japanese overacting and drama. The scholars are boring, annoying and their contemplations uninteresting.Phoenix incident, The
You know those 4 skatedude guys who went missing in Arizona? It was aliens man!
Wittenberg
23-12-2015
Too shaky
Hurah! It's not just found footage; it's loud, noisy and restless shaky footage too. Which makes this mockumentary, shoving a conspiracy down our throat, rather tiresome and lame.Ghost in the Shell: The New Movie
I think it's about cyborg major leading a team to resolve the assassination of the prime minister
Wittenberg
12-03-2017
Too complicated, not enough magic
It kept some of the magic of the original, but what it kept mostly is endless incomprehensible techno/politics that I could not stay focused on. It's not bad looking, but most of the art of the first movie is no longer here.Rape Zombie: Lust of the Dead
A few girls try to survive when all men turn into those
Wittenberg
14-08-2023
Not the killer pulp I hoped for
A film with a good chance of being so outrageously bad and incorrect that it becomes secretly enjoyable, but alas it had too little good ideas or energy for that. It's all quite lifeless. All the zombies walking around with their pants on their ankles earned it a bonus point though.Incantation
A woman is cursed of doing some ritual wrong. And she also adopts this daugther - I am not sure how it was related
Wittenberg
09-07-2022
Too messy
There are a couple of intense images, and the underlying vibe of strange and spooky rituals has potential. But the mockumentary approach was far-fetched and not doing it any favors, and the story and timeline are very confusing and jumpy. And honestly, I was kind of bored with it.Terminator Dark Fate
More or less the original story but with more females
Wittenberg
25-04-2020
No
Some action scenes successfully revisit the hard-hitting robot fights and good old car chases. But my god, Sarah Connor is a hideous, disastrous character now and the other ones have to deliver some pretty painful dialogue as well. The forever recovering evil cyborg got boring, too.Windtalkers
Marines are reluctantly tasked with protecting native american soldiers and their ability to transfer indecipherable messages
Wittenberg
10-05-2022
Did not age well
I think it made an impression as a war movie in the day, but I fear it has aged poorly. The acting and dialogues can be quite corny, the emotional scenes induce cringe, and the action is almost laugable with the hero shooting from the hip and all bad guys instantly drop dead.Expiry
A couple fails to have children before the expiry date of their relationship, then a bracelet makes physical contact impossible
Wittenberg
25-04-2021
Too thin
This almost sort of worked, as a minimalistic, futuristic story of a forbidden relationship. But after a while it starts to loose momentum, the therapy sessions (?) with some sort of HAL computer seem endless and pointless and the final escape scene brings it to amateuristic levels.Murder Mystery 2
Murder solving couple takes a much needed break on a distant island, but soon enough they're at it again
Wittenberg
08-04-2023
Formulaic slapstick with too little good jokes
I can see what they are going for, and objectively all the ingredients are here for a shot of uncomplicated amusement. I just thought the jokes were not all that, and everything is so safe, formulaic and predictable it feels like you have already seen it - and will forget about it tomorrow.House of Wax
Group of friends winds up in a desolate town where the wax museum holds a horrible secret
Wittenberg
18-06-2023
original subject can't generic horror formula
The wax subject is quite original and caters for some reasonable horror moments. The subject feels slightly underused though, but that's not the main problem. That would be the same old cast of pretty young adults behaving generically, unrealistically and rather tiresomely.Nun, The
A horrorstory based around the creepy nun from The Conjuring 2
Wittenberg
10-12-2018
Relies on scary nuns in alleys, not on a good story
While the dark abbey and nun figure do look terrifying, it soon becomes evident that this simply a stack of people slowly walking through creepy corridors and slowly turning their heads towards the next jumpscare. The story or built-up is seriously lacking and it started to bore me.Kill Command
Future space marines go train against robots in the woods, but then the robots start to become agressive beyond the program.
Wittenberg
11-09-2016
Nice robots though
Some guys were quite adept at making some good scifi designs and robotics, but not at making a movie around it. The combat lacks tension, performances are underwhelming, there's a lot or repetition and I fell asleep twice.Temple, The
Three people travel to a mysterious desolate temple in Japan where strange events have been reported
Wittenberg
30-09-2018
They forgot to write it
I quite liked the beginning with moody Japanese scenery and mystery. But as they approach the temple, it looks like they had no more ideas so they just threw in some random, incoherent bland scary stuff and were done with it. Very unsatisfying.Carnage
Single location film about parents meeting up try to resolve a physical clash between their sons. All start polite and aim to resolve the matter....
Wittenberg
10-01-2015
Great idea didn't work
A brave and fascinating idea that, given the actors, should have been firework. If fails however, as their quarrels are too scripted, their behavior, flip-flop mood swings and intoxication feel unnatural and phoney. And then there's the bizarre overacting of a constantly trembling Jodie Foster.Carrie (2013)
Girl with telekenetic powers and a hideous religous freakmother is being bullied one time too many
Wittenberg
25-07-2014
Identical yet inferior to the original
Who ordered this? A really pointless remake that does everything exactly the same, except for in the eerie atmosphere and masterful cinematography of the original. The only thing new is that the kids now have mobile phones with YouTube. Breathtaking. Moretz is overacting badly too.Hercules
Hercules and his companions help out a king against an evil army, but has he been fighting on the right side? And is he really a demigod?
RockmeNow
30-12-2014
Superficial B movie, somebody wake me up afterwards please
I will not spend many words discussing this movie. So I leave it with this...Wittenberg
07-12-2014
A bit boring
The large fights and mythical creatures should cater for some entertainment, but Hercules is a bit of a a B-movie dork, it never reaches anything deep, and frankly I was actually quite bored most of the time. They way they tease about Hercules' skills and origins was a nice find though.Huntsman: Winter's War, The
An alternative, side-story story situated around the area and events of the snow white fairy tale
Wittenberg
28-01-2017
Nothing to stand out or excite
I think the good intentions are there, but I found it rather flat and uninvolving, appearing rather insignificant next to giants like The Lord of the Ring.Good Day to Die Hard, A
McClane helps out his son, who appearantly is involved in some CIA operation in Russia
Wittenberg
15-09-2013
Boring high-octane action. Huh?
Contains some decent old-skool car chases and explosions, but none of it really becomes exciting. The story starts of clumsy and distant, then becomes bland and uninteresting. Definitely misses the Die Hard vibe.Great Raid, The
In WW2 soldiers undertake a daring missing to rescue prisonors from the Japanese Abanatuan camp
Wittenberg
15-01-2017
Felt like a movie, not a war rescue mission
I don't mean to sound disrespectful about this amazing operation, but I wasn't to keen on this movie. I constantly felt I was watching actors playing soldiers and prisoners, with unrealistic over rehearsed lines ruining the mood. The cliched and disconnected 'war movie music' didn't help either.Grudge, The
Woman takes home a curse from Japan, spelling doom for everyone that enters her house. A police officer investigates.
Wittenberg
22-12-2020
A well-made but boring jumpscare horror with zero new ideas
On the face of it, this looks and feels like a decent quality horror with fine actors too. Unfortunately, it has absolutely nothing else to offer but consecutive tired jump-scares with loud noises that you see coming from a mile away - and which get boring pretty quickly.Risen
Meteors crash on earth causing death among the nearby inhabitants. An xeno-astro-expert is called in to help.
Wittenberg
13-09-2021
Good setup undone by some unfortunate desicions
The setup is similar to "The Arrival", which is a good thing. The first half is also decent enough. But to make the expert such a depressed, lifeless character doesn't do any favors to the already slow-ish movie, and the plot twist is smothered in overblown flashbacks. Some poor CGI at places, too.Resident Evil: damnation
A seperate side story of the franchice? I don't know what it is. Hero vs monster things
Wittenberg
08-05-2021
Somewhat cool, mostly hollow and pointless
It probably looked awesome when it was released. Today it looks okay, and has some reasonably intense Resident Evil abominations running around. But I couldn't care less about the lifeless hero dork, or the vague story that came from nowhere and went nowhere. Not even sure what this is?Unholy, The
Fallen journalist accidently stumbles across a woman performing holy miracles in a small town, but how benevolent is she?
Wittenberg
06-02-2022
Fair story just not exectuted well
The story used as a framework is decent enough, but unfortunately didn't quite take off. Everything is a bit uninspired and doesn't seem to connect well (man dies under a burning cross, everyone just goes to the next scene). So we're left with some lackluster scare jumps and unscary horror.Color Out of Space
Things get weird and nasty when a meteor-like object and a mysterious color land in the garden of family living isolated in the woods.
Wittenberg
07-06-2020
A bit vague and improvised
It's somewhat ok, but I felt the horrors and scares were random and incoherent collection of things borrowed from other movies. As if every idea dropped was incorporated into this, no matter if it made sense. Consequently, it never gets really scary or intense and I was sort of glad when it was overPlanes
Planes flying around in the world of Cars (1)
Wittenberg
20-04-2014
What it needs to be
Not much in the way of originality, but adept at telling an effective, colorful and easy to follow story for the target audience.RockmeNow
29-11-2013
Planes flying around, that's about it
Ok, so it looks like the world of Cars (1), but with planes in it, which could be entertaining. But actually it is not, since they forgot to write a decent story. Too bad...Titan, The
On a diminishing earth, some humans are experimentally transformed so they can live on the moon Titan
Wittenberg
12-08-2018
Experiment failed
It started okay-ish with a potentially interesting story and decent actors, but it is let down by a slow pace causing my attention to wander off several times, and then the story falls apart as it becomes incomprehensible and weird.Captive State
An underground network of rebels fight back against alien occupation
Wittenberg
01-08-2019
Average
Apart from a few tasty scenes, the scifi level is very low and they might as well have been fighting human oppressors. I found it hard to follow what everyone was doing and what the plan was, and the red dust from the poster is not in this movie AT ALL. Quite average.Pet Semetary (2019)
A family man discovers a semetary that brings back dead pets. What else could it work on?
Wittenberg
25-06-2023
not scary enough, too little to standout
While it has some good moments, like the backstory of his wife that is actually more scary than the main plot, overall I found it a bit plain and predictable. The scares don't go deep.Harbinger Down
Crab fishing boat picks up a space derelict from the ice, after which something otherwordly preys upon the crew
Wittenberg
21-10-2019
Bearable for sci-fi horror enthusiasts
Acting is mostly bad. Dialogue strange and clunky. Monster makes inappropriate animal growls. And plenty of bad stuff besides. But still, the concept of something mysterious happening on a dark, desolate ship in the arctic is still enough to make this worthwhile, and some of it is quite okay.Control
Woman repeatedly wakes up in a closed room, where a voice gives her assignments to test her telekinetic abilities
Wittenberg
22-05-2023
Lacks excitement or ideas
While single-location movies may same ideal for low budget, it must be compensated for by the story and acting for it to work. This movie has neither. It kind of meanders with the concept, runs out of juice and then has a somewhat dissonant finale. Hmmm.Hitman: Agent 47
Evil coorporation plans to revive a program for superhuman killers, but they have to deal with an earlier 'model' of superagent trying to stop them.
Wittenberg
02-08-2016
Some cool action served in a tired Hollywood sauce
I sort of get the cool and stylish action scenes in here, but it is hard to enjoy them given the the over the top coincidental story and one-dimensional people speaking Hollywood gibberish, like "Sometimes when I can't sleep, I like to take things apart"Make My Day
A space soldier and his friends try to escape from planet when it is overrun with monsters coming out of it's mine
Wittenberg
19-03-2023
Poor characters and story
While there some stuff to like - like the general looks of it, the music, the creatures, and some cool scifi action - I could not get over the awful main character, who is constantly sobbing and making those awful Manga gasps. Many other characters, as well as the story, can be quite painful too.Ready Player One
In a near future, where people spend most of their time living their fantasies in VR, a group of friends aims to solve a grand puzzle in this virtual world
Wittenberg
09-02-2019
Childish and patronizing fan service
I am a movie, game and VR aficionado so this ought to have been perfect for me. But I found it hard to get into this childish and strange mixture, and it struck me like it was made by someone who doesn't really play games and was constantly going: see what i did here. You kids like this yes?Glass
A researcher investigates the credibility and actual superpowers of the superhero's from Unbreakable and Split
Wittenberg
17-08-2019
Ultimately a failed attempt to prolong this
The story provides a potentially clever reason to bring these people together and add a twist to the story, but mostly it feels like everybody was dragged in front of the camera again, the "research" was laughable and I still hate MPD - it is so embarrassing to look at, not scary at all.Outside the Wire
After neglecting an order, a drone pilot is send to join a mysterious supersoldier on a dangerous quest
Wittenberg
23-01-2021
Tries to be something it's not
With military action and gun-toting robots, this ought to has been my thing. But I was quiet disappointed. Mostly because they talk tough and say deep things, but it all falls completely flat. It's just trying too hard to be cool and relevant without following up on it.Million Ways to Die in the West, A
Out of place cowboy is dumped by his true love, but gets unexpected help to win her back
Wittenberg
01-03-2015
Why the story?
Come on people! Why didn't they just parody the hell out of western movies in true McFarlane style? An ineffective mix of some brutal and bold humor drowned in an uninteresting and righteous love story.Exists
Them kids in a cabin in the woods are terrorized my Bigfoot. All caught with found footage.
Wittenberg
16-04-2016
Average, quite unoriginal stuff
The more we get to see this creature, the less scary it becomes. And for Christs sake, does it always have to be teenage stoners who experience this stuff? And they brought how many camera's? Sit with the other average found footage horror movies please.Witcher season 2, The
The witcher is training the princess he protects, but her powers become more and more concerning
Wittenberg
09-01-2022
It's now soap
I still like the Witcher atmosphere, and sure there are some memorable moments to be found. But mostly I found season 2 remarkably tedious and empty. The main culprit is the oddly soapy style of storytelling, with endless conversations between people doing bizarre strolls through hallways.Revolt
During a robot invasion, a commando suffering from memory loss teams up up with a woman in trying to survive
Wittenberg
07-10-2018
Compotent but underwhelming
I couldn't quite wrap my head around why I was so underwhelmed by this. Action, FX and story seem ok and I like how it was situated in Africa for a change. I fear the bland, slightly uninteresting main characters might have something to do with it.This is the End
Film actors at a party find themselves amidst judgement day... and saviour of the righteous only
Wittenberg
23-06-2015
Mostly self absorbed
The idea of the actors playing more or less themselves in a bizarre situation like this is kind of nice. But for the most part, the look-at-how-funny-we-are is tiresome instead.Blackhat
In order to combat cyber assaults on a powerplant and the stockmarket, the FBI calls in the help of an incarcerated superhacker
Wittenberg
02-08-2016
Nicely shot nonsense
It looks and sounds slick, but it is ruined by a lazy, romanticized and dumped-down Hollywood view of 'hacking' and a miscasted pretty boy as a hacker. Also, the hacker apparently was allowed to engage in FBI activities like shooting, fighting and pursuit. Preposterous.Obi-Wan Kenobi
Obi-Wan is forced to come into action when young princess Leia is abducted by the Empire
Wittenberg
12-08-2022
A rather tired bulge of more Starwars
It's always nice to have another fix of Starwars, but frankly it is getting increasingly harder to get high from it. This series was low-energy and somehow has no impact on the saga. There are also some poorly choreographed action scenes that may have worked in the 70's, but look ridiculous today.Encanto
All members of a family living a magic house receive special magic talent, except one
Wittenberg
31-12-2021
Objectively great, subjectively exhausting
With whopping graphics, a tasty Colombian vibe, sparkling colors and scenery, and wholesome life lessons, objectively it is a marvel. But it is trying too hard - too much hysteric humor, constantly restless and hectic, and too much loud songs. The few simple dialogue scenes form oases of serenity.6 Underground
Group of very cool hitman people aim to set free a country from an evil dictator
Wittenberg
14-04-2020
Failed experiment
I was in for it; could an overload of non-stop Micheal Bay signature crap eventually transform into a trance-like satisfying experience? We'll never know, because even he couldn't keep up the initial pace, and let this slide off to a more generic and only somewhat amusing actionflick.Wounds
Bartender finds distrubing images on a telephone left by a customer, starts seeing bugs and is chosen for a mysterious cult ritual
Wittenberg
06-09-2020
Mixed feelings
When slow burning is done wrong, it is just slow. Near the middle it manages to spark some interest, only to loose it again because the writers couldn't figure out how to tie the story elements together. It's pretty ok though, mainly because the performances and created amtosphere.Golem, The
A woman tries to defend a secluded Jewish community by summoning a creature from the soil
Wittenberg
07-07-2019
Great setting, but second half is too directionless
It lays down a really good mood with the sober, deeply religious and ritualized community. But it feels like they forgot to think through what would happen once the Golem is there, so it starts to feel loose and deflates. The music, while good, was too eager and didn't really fit well.House of 1000 Corpses
Two couples on a roadtrip take detour to find the infamous Dr. Satan, but wind up in a house where a terrible fate awaits
Wittenberg
06-03-2022
Disturbing in an unpleasant and lazy way
Much of the unease comes from the nasty music and color-inverted imagery. It feels a bit like cheating. The rest still holds plenty of shock value, but somehow it felt like that was the sole purpose instead of telling a story. Like Rob went 'Oh look how shocking this is", "Just look at this scene!"Man of Tai Chi
In order to help his master and temple, a Tai Chi expert is forced to use this soft style in a hard way in illegal underground fights
Wittenberg
11-05-2014
Dozing off during bare-handed fights to the death.... weird
Who knows: these could be some of the most complicated and extraordinary fighting scenes ever. But it is all remarkably boring, because of the unoriginal story and lack of any tension. Keanu portays one of the most dull one-trick pony villains ever.Last Voyage of the Demeter, The
A ship transports a doomed cargo from Transalvania to London.
Wittenberg
10-09-2023
Lacks inpsiration or surprises
Everything is there for a genuinely creepy experience: A mysterious monster, a squeaky wooden ship and gloomy dark seas. Yet I wasn't scared by it, perhaps even a little indifferent. There's something too modern about the style, and a lack of surprises or connection with the characters.Iron Man 3
Iron man takes on a terrorist
Wittenberg
13-10-2013
Iron mess
Mindblowing events and technology, yet noone seems to give a damn. So neither did I. A mess of rushed storytelling, boredom, an unlikable hero, noise and so much Iron man suits that I stopped caring about any of them. Suicide by abundance.Zoolander 2
Derek has retreated and gone out of fashion, but must come back into action to save his son
Wittenberg
26-12-2016
Not up to their potential
I dig the whacky Zoolander world and humor, but unfortunately this story was too formulaic and good jokes too scarce.Deadpool 2
Deadpool looses his wife and wants to protect some kid
Wittenberg
15-10-2019
Lacks substance, just gags
The cynical nature of Deadpool and the kitsch, over-elaborate fighting scenes are the real aces of this movie, but after a while it gets exhausting and overdone, and with only a rather vague and messy story to fall back on I found myself strangely bored for the amount of stuff that goes on.Zathura
Jumanji in space
Wittenberg
18-04-2021
Lacking that extra something
This may appeal to a younger audience, but overall I felt it wasn't quite there. Actors are a bit lifeless, jokes fall flat, scenes drag on for too long. It's fine, but missing the spark, magic, wit or funfactor to make it appeal to a broader audience.Star Trek Beyond
A brute force enemy causes the Enterprise to crashland. The survivors must find away to release the hostages and prevent further mayhem
Wittenberg
24-04-2017
Awkward and off
The scenes of destruction are mighty, but overall this really felt off. They totally overdid the constant humor which started to feel like slapstick. The story and events also felt awkward and cheesy like the original series, with embarrassing scenes like driving around a motorbike to divert aliensGame Over, Man
Three stoned failure teenagers work as housekeepers in a hotel when it gets sieged. Will they save the day
Wittenberg
16-01-2021
Mostly a bad taste teenager flick
For some reason I thought this would rise above standard teenage, bad-taste material through better jokes, better humor and plenty of gore to spice things up. But it hardly does so, it really is mostly bad taste teenager flick with perhaps a handful of laugh out moments.Space Sweepers
Space scavengers find a girl that is also bomb, which marks the beginning of a wild ride
Wittenberg
18-04-2021
Could have been fresh, but gave a headache instead
While I like the designs, FX and fresh vibe, I found it hard to get into the restless and erratic style of the movie, and didn't attach to any of the cartoonish, one-dimensional characters.Silent Sea, The
In a water-deprived future, a team flies to the moon to retrieve a mysterious sample from an abondened base that may hold the key to a sollution
Wittenberg
24-01-2022
Some baseline enterntainment but full of problems
As a scifi fan I could get some enjoyment out of this, but it wasn't easy. We have another unlikely crew handling everything rather unprofessionally, the dialogue has oodles of 'naaaah' moments, the story felt broken and actress Doona sucks the life out of it with her apathetic and depressing style.Phantom
Russian sub must carry a mysterious crew and device along on a mission
Wittenberg
16-03-2014
Good intentions drowned in mistakes
Some fine actors and submarine drills can't compensate for a miscasted Duchovny and slow and insecure script. Most exciting scenes are destroyed when, in the heat of a moment, Duchovny asks "what are you doing now", and the captain actually pauses his command and starts to explain!!!!Wandering Earth, The
Earth is equiped with huge thrusters to fly it to a new habitable galaxy, but the journey knows many dangers
Wittenberg
05-05-2019
The Chinese are starting to copy the wrong things
I can appreciate huge production values as well as the story, but the execution is chaotic, at times incomprehensible and sadly felt like the Chinese are now emulating the wrong Hollywood kitsch and cliches. It felt like a Chinese Armageddon clone.Replicas
When a memory transfer scientist looses his entire family in a car crash, he attempts to get them back by cloning them, including their mind
Wittenberg
11-08-2019
Mostly a missed opportunity
It's a good idea but never really takes off. Everyone seems disconnected and indifferent about what's going on, it lacks the eerie or fascinating ambience I would expect with a story like this, and it has got one of those annoying air computer interfaces, operated by ridiculous hand movements.Accountant, The
Autistic man has a special talent for accounting, and appearantly for some darker activities as well
Wittenberg
02-01-2019
Too far-fetched
This didn't really connect with me. The story is way too far-fetched, made-up and over the top to be taken seriously, and it dwells in the tiresome notion that autistic people must have superpowers.Khanzab
A girl tries to solve the mystery of her father's violent death, and black magic curse surrounding her family
Wittenberg
01-10-2023
Good scares for some scenes, but not an entire movie
I was looking forward to experiencing the Indonesian take on horror. There are some moods and scenes that are quite intense, but they repeated until they loose their effectiveness. The story gets quite messy and the spirits pop in like puppets a haunted house at the fair.Hippopotamus
With no memory, a girl awakens in a room with a man telling her she can't leave until she loves him
Wittenberg
10-12-2023
A fair puzzler missing class
Nothing wrong with these low budget movies in a single location, where you'll grow eager to find out how it all came to be. The story is also reasonably well thought out and offers some layers near the end. But I found both the actors and direction missing intensity and depth.Movies found: 1043 | max movies per page: 100 | Showing: 121 - 220
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