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My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell it to

Brother and sister need blood for their brother who has a very special condition

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
29-06-2023
7.5

Different and unpleasant, and definitely worthwhile.

There's something quite unsettling about seeing normal people processing heavy dead bodies, especially when the atmosphere and acting is natural and plain. The special 'patient' even manages to evoke feelings of sympathy.
7.5

Mutant Girl Squad

A girl with a mutated knive hand joins a group of other mutant girls to make a stand to those who oppose them

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-04-2023
6.5

Outrageously extreme yet still slightly boring

I really wanted to like this more, as it is a deliciously bizarre Powerrangers with gore, fountains of blood and insane mutations like a chainsaw tentacle coming from someone's butt. Fantastic anarchy, but I also noticed it is utterly flat and empty, making me forget this movie in mere days.
6.5

Murder Mystery 2

Murder solving couple takes a much needed break on a distant island, but soon enough they're at it again

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
08-04-2023
5.5

Formulaic slapstick with too little good jokes

I can see what they are going for, and objectively all the ingredients are here for a shot of uncomplicated amusement. I just thought the jokes were not all that, and everything is so safe, formulaic and predictable it feels like you have already seen it - and will forget about it tomorrow.
5.5

Mummy, The

Modernday thief digs up a mummy that wasn't supposed to be found, for good reason

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-12-2017
4.5

Underperforms in many fields

A surprisingly boring flick that feels like it was made ten years too late and does a lot of things wrong. I was especially annoyed by the humorless role of the female interest, it never got scary or tense and it severely lacked some good music.
4.5

Mulholland Drive

Woman on her way to make it in Hollywood, finds a mysterious woman in her bathroom (probably not the best summary).

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-11-2021
6.5

Should have triggered me, but didn't

The Lynch-weirdness comes in late and it quite small doses, so mostly it actually felt like a movie of girlfriends going on an adventure. I love being puzzled by surrealism, but in here it didn't seem to trigger me, or the subjects and themes were just too plain.
6.5

Movie 43

Teenagers scout the internet for a movie that doesn't exist, taking them through various bizarre movies as they go

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-01-2014
4.5

fascinatingly unfunny

In itself I can see potential in the jokes on offer. But I just gazed at these clumsy, grime and bizarre sketches without laughing once, becoming almost fascinated in the process. It's one of those 'You need the right drug first' movies, but if you find which one, it could be hysterical.
4.5

Mountain Between Us, The

Man and woman survice a crashlanding in the snowy mountains, and now face survival as well as a developing forbidden love between them

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-09-2020
6.5

Yeh sort of works

Throughout the film there's alternating scenes of them taking a few more steps, and then a much longer scene of them resting and developing feelings for each other amidst all misery. Both are fine, but none of them felt very profound.
6.5

Mountain

A documentary that explores our relationship with mountains

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-03-2023
7.5

A poetic analysis

Instead of a dry analytic approach, it chooses a more poetic blend of music, philosophic narration and plenty of spectacular images. Very beautiful, but I remained on my couch nonetheless. And while the sport scenes are probably rightfully part of the story, they felt a bit dissonant to me.
7.5

Mother!

In an isolated house, a woman struggles with her husband's increasing tendency to have strangers stay over, up until extreme and paranormal levels (this description probably sucks, you tell me!)

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-09-2017
8

A different kind of horror

A reminder that horror and unrest can come in many shapes, not just ghouls and ghosts. A disturbing but very engrossing experience which I thought was fresh, well acted and intense. It felt great to see a movie again that sticks with you and leaves a goddamn impression.
8

Mother of No Destination, A

First, people that discover the immenent end of the world are hunted down, then the remaining people on a space ark are terrorized

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-08-2021
2

Let's call it art

Listen, I really tried to look at this as a completely homemade, completely amateur movie, but even then I did not find any redeeming qualities. Maybe it's deliberately trying to be as bad as can be, so that it becomes art or intoxicating. I must admit I felt weird after watching it.
2

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