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Mulholland Drive
Woman on her way to make it in Hollywood, finds a mysterious woman in her bathroom (probably not the best summary).
Wittenberg
25-11-2021
Should have triggered me, but didn't
The Lynch-weirdness comes in late and it quite small doses, so mostly it actually felt like a movie of girlfriends going on an adventure. I love being puzzled by surrealism, but in here it didn't seem to trigger me, or the subjects and themes were just too plain.Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Alexandes wishes that for once his family could experience the awful bad luck has usually has during the day
Wittenberg
26-04-2015
A bit too constrained
I expected some more anarchy and mayhem with a title like that. Now it is a funny but rather tame and polite comedy with too few standout jokes and all kinds of morals and lessons to boot.In the Tall Grass
Pursuing cries for help, a brother and sister get lost in a field of tall grass - where weird stuff is going
Wittenberg
29-11-2019
Lacks the quality to make it last
It's an interesting idea, but would require a clever story and/or great actors to make it work for the entire duration of a movie. Unfortunately, it doesn't really have neither, so after a while and starts to loose appeal. Bonus points for trying though.Rain, season 1, The
Girl and her brother try to survive in a world destoyed by deadly rain
Wittenberg
05-06-2023
Mostly ok, but too familiar, too annoying
There was something overly familiar about the concept of these abandoned city's and rivaling factions. On top of that, most characters and their actions annoyed too much to really get into the first few episodes. Halfway through it kind of happened, only to be let down again by a lackluster finale.Adrift
Freshly in love couple sail a boat across the Pacific back to the States. But misery strikes, wrecks the boat and now survival is up to her
Wittenberg
02-06-2019
Ruined by constant flashbacks
For it's entire duration, the movie alternates the present with flashbacks in which we have to endure a sugar coated love romance with cheesy music to boot. This constantly resets the tension and sensation of despair, making this survival movie much less intense than it could and should have been.Nocebo
A woman gets sick after being biten by a tick, so she seeks help from her Filipina household who uses folklore on her
Wittenberg
29-03-2023
Fair enough, but lacks intensity
It's a decent movie with a twist that, even though you can see it coming, gives it some depth. It's just that it never becomes really scary or intense. It remains a bit lightweight.Barbarouse Mexico
Several short and nasty horror stories. In Mexico.
Wittenberg
09-05-2023
Gritty but pointless
The atmosphere is different, and the stories have some fairly gritty and depressing stuff on offer. But all seemed to lack a clue or turn of events to liven things up. It's all "bad stuff happens, the end, next", which left a bit of an unfulfilled sensation.Finch
Survivor of some world apocalyptic event builts a robot to take care of his dog when he dies
Wittenberg
09-01-2022
A nice tale that had slightly more potential
It's a sympathetic tale of human friendship and it works for the most part, growing on me as it went on. However, I think the robot's progress in learning, behavior and humor could have been more subtle, interesting and refined, and making him sound like Borat was part of the problem.Skyline
Room full of pretty people must survive an invasion of ugly aliens
Wittenberg
02-11-2013
Good looking B movie
An unusual cross between a B movie with dull actors having tedious arguments, and very decent effects and designs. Guess what's more important in the end?Cloverfield Paradox, The
A spacestation desperately tries to harvest a new type of energy for a dying earth, but accidently triggers multiverse dimension stuff in doing so
Wittenberg
07-02-2018
Tries to mask a flat execution with random dimensional thingies.
An awesome premise but lackluster execution with slightly dull actors ultimately no good script. The dimension stuff that happens feels arbitrary, like they just threw in 'weird stuff'. I was constantly like Why did they... why would that.... that doesn't even.... And WHAT WAS THE PARADOX?Hotel transylvania 2
Will the halfbreed vampire child have vampire abilites? Turmoil in the monster hotel.
Wittenberg
11-12-2015
Like a an amusementpark ride
A very animated, lively fun movie that is cramped with jokes. So much so I thought it was exhaustive and it felt as though the bombardment of jokes was camouflaging the absence of a strong story or characters to bind with. Fun - but instantly forgettable.Advantageous
Without a job and with a daughter to support, a woman decides to earn money by having herself tranfered into a younger body
Wittenberg
17-06-2018
Different, interesting but very slow
A sober, slowly moving drama that doesn't over-please the viewer, has some decent performances by the cast and is certainly 'interesting'. As a whole though, it really is very slow up to the point of lifelessness, some more spices would have been welcome in places.San Andreas
Dad needs to search and rescue his ex-wife and then his daughter in the aftermath of huge earthquake
Wittenberg
28-02-2016
Too Hollywood
A technically sound, mostly good looking disaster flick, served with the typical cardboard characters, an omnipotent superhero, drenched in a sauce of Hollywood cliches. It ends with them staring across the sunset with an American flag waving nearby. yay!Pompeii
Slave gladiator falls for girl above his league, then has to fight his way to freedom through evil romans and erupting volcanos
Wittenberg
03-05-2014
Fine, but not all it could have been
Sort of a fine and good looking flick. Would have been much more intense if the characters weren't as 1-dimensional, the story a bit more refined, and the whole thing looked a little less clean and fabricated.Like Father
When her groom walks out just before the wedding, the bride ends up drunk and taking her long lost dad on the honeymoon trip
Wittenberg
07-10-2018
Nothing stands out
It's got the actors, humor, story line and locations, but all in very restrained, save and average portions, making this a rather average affair. Not bad, but could have used some more spices for my taste.Sex Tape
Couple makes a sex tape to spice up their sex life, but it ends up on the interclouds! Now, how to get it off?
Wittenberg
14-10-2014
Little more than it's own tagline
Yes, you'll giggle. But you'll also find that the central joke is pretty much all there is.Tombraider
Lara sets of the Japan to look for her long missing father, who was investigating a mysterious tomb on a desolate island
Wittenberg
03-02-2019
Faithful videogame recreations don't automatically mean it's good
It follows the game really closely, and some of the scenes and scenery were really familiar. But, as much as I loved these games, seeing it recreated with real people just falls short and makes everything shallow, predictable and lifeless. I Guess this exemplifies the problem with videogame movies.Cidade InvisÃvel
After the mysterious death of his wife, a Brazilian environmental police officer (with gun?) discovers the truth about local folkore creatures
Wittenberg
30-01-2023
A bit plain
The Brazilian folklore entities are quite refreshing, and it's all brought rather plainly without much much blustering, which gives it a genuine, unpretentious atmosphere. However, it also makes the experience as a whole plain as well. I thought it missed intensity and excitement here and there.Bright
Against his will, a cop gets assigned an Orc as his partner, with whom he will go through a long, dangerous night
Wittenberg
04-08-2018
A not entirely succesfull mixture
It's an interesting idea to, without explanation, simply put orcs and elves among people and base the story on that. But everyone's so chagrined, no one's really likable and the atmosphere is very grim, whereas orcs as basketball gang members and the elves were kind of childish to me.Rampage
Retired military man running a gorilla shelter, must save the city form mutated monster animals.
Wittenberg
24-11-2019
Fine for what it is
Based a a videogame with no story to speak of, this movie came it surprisingly well (as in: this could have been much much worse). It's a mindless but fun action blockbuster like most Dwayne Johnson movies, and it works well enough as long as your expectations are realistic.Casshern
In some future, a man brought back from the dead - now possessing superpowers - is the only hope against other humans risen from the dead
Wittenberg
09-02-2024
A pretty and special movie, but it's hard to be moved by it
With every scene set against artificial backdrops of futuristic steampunk, this is certainly a special looking movie with an mysterious atmosphere to match. It's just that the characters are flat as a pancake, and the story and everything else is so boombastic and unrelatable.Archive 18
Video repairman gets a myserious gig to restore some tapes, and the footage drags him into the supernatural and occult
Wittenberg
12-02-2022
Not quite
It started of well, with a nice blend of horror and mystery, and I liked how the 'found' footage was alternated with 'real' footage. Unfortunately, it was let down by really unrealistic, strangely behaving and talking characters, a onedimensional lead actress and well, it's failure to become scary.Scanner Darkly, A
Cop (sort of) gets involved in drug business by using it himself
Wittenberg
01-09-2014
Less than meets the eye
The painted looks of this movie are just great, but I don't quite get why they needed to be in this fairly plain drug story. The effect serves no clear function to me. (Well perhaps there's the shifting suites - but why don't these folks just put on a mask?)Kong: Skull Island
Expedition team and a heavy military escort travels to a mysterious, previously undiscovered island
Wittenberg
15-03-2018
It's all there but...
Although it feels like the director really wanted to make a Vietnam war movie, the movie objectively seems pretty competent in terms of style, old school adventure and monsters. But it never really grabbed me. I am not sure why, but the rather generic characters might have something to do with it.Taking of Deborah Logan, The
Students want to film a patient with Alzheimers, but end up documenting something much more sinister
Wittenberg
29-11-2023
Some good scares and ideas in a mediocre mockumentary
This movie captures the potential creepiness of elderly people doing strange things in the dark quite well, and certainly has some striking scenes to offer. But some of the other characters, and most of the unconvincing in-between found footage stuff, bored me.Interview, The
Dodgy network channel gets the chance to interview the leader of North Korea, and are asked by the CIA to kill him in the progress
Wittenberg
28-02-2015
Another okay-ish comedy
Given the the actors, plot and possibilties, I expected more of this. Besides a few laughs, there's also very long periods with not much in it, and the movie can be hysteric and a bit embarrassing at times.Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
Did you know that after killing the witch, Hansel and Gretel became witch hunters?
Wittenberg
15-06-2013
Tries everything except being scary or exciting
Oh I don't know. They tried their best and it shows. But the witches are just there from the beginning, there is no tension built-up. These loud, semi-artistic fights for people with MTV brains are getting on my nerves too. Mixes too many styles and atmospheres.Tetsuo: The Iron Man
A bad trip about a man who is slowly turning into metal scrap
Wittenberg
02-01-2022
A good bad trip, but too pointless to be a satisfying movie
What if those creepy black and white 'art student movies' you see in horror films were a full length experience? Maybe it would be something like this. I was quite intrigued at first; it is effectively unsettling. But after while I wondered where it all was going and I lost my curiosity.Kin
Boy finds a strange superweapon in a deserted factory, which he is forced to use to help out his brother caught up in criminal troubles.
Wittenberg
05-12-2018
Too slow and mixed up
Ultimately, I found the unusual mix of science fiction, family drama, crime and a roadmovie uncomfortable, and thought that way up until the finale it was rather slow as well. But I have to give some points for originality,the groovy gun and the finale.Deep Ones, The
Couple rents a place by the sea, but the strange hosts soon drag them into strange rituals involving some sea entity (Cthulhu!)
Wittenberg
28-07-2021
Not scary, but perhaps that wasn't the point. An ode to horror?
Acting and camera work is so clunky that it sometimes feels like you're watching porn. But when I also heard the 50's classic 'whistle' mystery music style I began to suspect they were aiming for a certain atmosphere. It sort of works: it's campy and entertaining. But scary or intense, it is notChoose or Die
Girl gets caught up in a mysterious vintage game that makes people make horrible choices
Wittenberg
21-05-2022
Some entertainment, but not great
For a horror it doesn't really scare much, and overall execution is a little underwhelming. The way the game interacts with the real world seems inconsistent and not very well thought out. But well, there are some new ideas and it does provide some basic amusement value.Osiris Child, The
Pilot must save his daughter from a planet overrun by vicious beasts
Wittenberg
08-04-2019
Bits and pieces
At times this has some pretty graphics, some decent acting and some passable action scenes. But if also features some annoying characters to ruin things, and as a whole felt a bit directionless, and empty.Blue is the Warmest Color (La Vie d'Adèle)
Girl becomes lesbian
Wittenberg
21-02-2016
Beautiful but too long and too slow
You have to admire how the gorgeous lead actrices carry this story with beautifully authentic acting. But everything takes so freaking long in this movie, everything is so spread out that in the end even the intimate love scenes started to bore me.Dark skies
Family is being visited by aliens
Wittenberg
19-05-2013
Greys don't have much to say
Some good scares and performances. But this movie is so loyal to the alien-visitors handbook that is struggling to fill up the time, resulting in loads of pointless scenes and an anticlimax.Thor The Dark World
Evil forces want to bring darkness to the worlds. Thor intervenes
Wittenberg
20-04-2014
Another curious case of stellar looking boredom
I just sat around wondering how I could be so bored with so much beautiful looking stuff going on. Natalie Portman, who is dragged into celestial warfare, doesn't appear to be impressed by any of it either. Points are solely for looks and effort.Evil Dead (2013)
Kids go into the woods to rehab a friend Then they find a book and unwillingly release hell.
Wittenberg
14-06-2015
Slashing that still leaves you indifferent
As a cabin slasher it appeared solid and effective, yet I couldn't really get scared or excited by it. Characters too dull and silly, story too well known.Mortal Kombat (2021)
Warriors are gathered to fight other warriors in another realm
Wittenberg
19-06-2021
A step closer to a good videogame movie
With a promising beginning, overall high production standards, appearance of several game characters and even some fatalities (which are oddly more gutting in the game than in the movie) this was close to an actual decent game movie. But the dull, flat characters and story again let it down badly.Stalingrad
In WWII the battle for Stalingrad, Russians and Germans fight for a strategically situated building and the few women left in the vicinity
Wittenberg
05-10-2014
Actors and story can't keep the few impressive scenes afloat
A good looking - if not over processed - movie, with some very intense scenes that will remain stuck with me. But the rest of story is struggling to bind it all together, with slow and clumsy scenes that fail to show the terror that these men must have been in.Gerald's Game
In an isolated vacation home, a man ties his wife to the bed for sexy times, then dies of a heartattack
Wittenberg
15-08-2020
Not as unbearable as I hoped for
A bold idea, but the lead actress was unable to convey her dread and dismay to the screen, the dialogue with her 'ghosts' seemed a bit childish and like a play, and the twist at the very end seemed unnecessary and farfetched.Darkest Hour, The
Teenagers must make it through an alien invasion in moscow
Wittenberg
27-08-2013
A floating light can only be so scary
The abandoned streets of Moscow looked great. But the jumpy characters, the goofy people they meet along the way, and the unscary lights just don't have what it takes.Approaching the Unknown
A skilled engineer and solo astronaut must handle numerous challenges during his the voyage to Mars
Wittenberg
03-11-2016
Sober scifi with a few letdowns.
It has a lot going for it, like a nice techy (but not necessarily realistic) theme and a pleasant, sober approach that doesn't do cheap thrills. On the downside, the main actor is not really sympathetic, and the single 'capcom' guy plainly sitting behind a desk was just silly and cheap.Bad Biology
Nymphomaniac with multiple clitori crosses path with a guy who's overgrown penis has a mind of it's own. Not porn. I think.
Wittenberg
22-08-2021
Weird filth that does what it wants and I commend them for it
This was sort of rebellious and liberating in a way, but perhaps that's just because I watched too many generic and formulaic Hollywood movies lately. Sure it is bad, trashy and bizarre, but somehow it doesn't care and I sort of enjoyed the audacity of it.Mist, The
A mist containing monstrous creatures traps a group of people inside a supermarket
Wittenberg
28-11-2023
Too much cartoon people to be scary
I think it has that distinctive style of Stephen King, featuring a group of various very talkative and exaggerated characters arguing and contemplating as they face this ordeal. Almost like watching a play. Somehow it drains most of the tension, and left me slightly amused rather than scared.Homunculus
A man agrees to have a hole drilled in his head, after which he can see manifestations people's inner selves
Wittenberg
07-05-2023
Great idea, executed so-so
It focuses more on psychological drama than horror of science fiction, and rightly so. It's an exciting concept that unfortunately doesn't really take off. The characters are not really likeable, and the story is a bit of hit and miss. One of those movies you think could have been much better.Nude Nuns with Big Guns
After being sold an abused as a sex slave, a nun sets out to take revenge.
Wittenberg
10-04-2016
Nice and campy
Much like Tarantino movies, it shamelessly celebrates campy, violent, badly acted, poorly edited movies taking please in sweaty Mexican style landscapes. It does so quite well, but it also doesn't do much more than that. And the guns weren't that big either.Sully
On the miracle emergency plane landing on the Hudson where everyone walked away
Wittenberg
27-08-2017
Over dramatized
The landing appears faithfully recreated and was thrilling to see, but the events surrounding it felt over dramatized. Also, the research committee seemed strangely angry and eager to discredit the pilot's doings, and almost started crying when they couldn't. What??Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
Batman hates Superman for the havoc he inflicted battling Zod, and Lex adds to the misery by creating another supevillain. And also...
Wittenberg
04-09-2016
Tiresome spectacle
A very well made, mostly good looking superhero epic that nevertheless failed to fully make an impression. It was exhaustively messy and cramped, incoherent and sort of depressing. I found Batman totally unlikable and his hatred towards Superman felt forced.Maleficent
The fairytale of sleeping beauty with a few of twists added
Wittenberg
24-11-2015
Beautiful fairytale without impact
At times pleasing to look at, and Jolie is excellent as well. But it combines mystery, children's humor and more darker tones, resulting in a movie that fails to leave a lasting impression in any of these fields.Death Note
Dude finds a book in which he can write down the name of people he wants dead. And it works too.
Wittenberg
14-09-2020
Somewhat refreshing but not quite terrifying
Never seen the manga it was based on, so I can't comment on that. I thought it was a reasonably fresh horror with some new ideas and twists that make it worthwhile, but the atmosphere was not menacing or scary; It was reminiscent of the Gremlins and Critters-style 'fun' horror, suitable for minors.Demonic
Woman is asked to communicate with her comatose mother in a 'simulation', but awakens demonic evil in doing so
Wittenberg
31-10-2021
Fresh, but should have been better
It's a nifty combination of tech, occult and horror and I liked it. It's just unfortunate that it failed to really make an impression or become really scary. Like the story required some more twists and layers, and should have 'aged' more before making the movie.Movies found: 1044 | max movies per page: 50 | Showing: 401 - 450
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