BoiledDown.net


If everyone's a critic, then so are we!
critic login

Battle in Space: The Armada Attacks

Several (unrelated?) scifi stories

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
07-01-2024
3

Perhaps if it had decent stories

The stories consist of computer graphics alternated with (amateur?) actors doing stuff, with no real sense of connection. It's all quite hopeless, even if if the clumsiness of it all almost makes it sympathetic. The truly unforgivable sins were the supervague stories and random sensationalist title.
3

Stairs, The

Boy and grandpa find stairs in the woods and go missing. Years later, a group of other hikers find them, unaged. And the stairs. And some demon.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-09-2021
3

Uninspired and unsuccesful horror

The opening gets by (barely), but the adult hikers are a rather annoying bunch (the metalguy is almost unwatchable) and so are the rather uninteresting and vague events they encounter. It's allover they place, like they just threw in some random horror things to fill it up.
3

Exodus

After the rapture (apparently), a guy tries to find his way to a mysterious door to a better place

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-09-2021
3

I am sure they mean well. Zzzzz.

It seems the that hardest thing to get right in these low-budget, low-tier movies is keeping the pace and keeping interest. It probably could have been a mysterious, symbolic, thought provoking journey, but it's just agonizingly slow, empty and emotionless journey.
3

EmbriĆ³n

Attempts to tell a story about (mulitple?) people that went missing or weird after an alien encounter

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-08-2021
3

A hot mess

My god. A messy, incoherent and incomprehensible mixture of found footage and a 'real' movie , it jumps allover the place to new locations and years (almost with each cut!), pacing is weird and feels made-up as they went along, and I did not understand most of it. Poster art is fake.
3

ISRA 88

Two astonauts passing time on their way to the end of the universe

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
07-04-2017
3

Unbearingly boring

Possibly it was trying to say something deep. But this barrage of long, pointless, repetitious scenes, goofy acting and plywood set pieces was just god-awful and made sure I didn't care what it was. A shame, because a journey to the end of the universe sounds so freaking amazing.
3

Fortress (2012)

Replacement co-pilot of a B-17 struggles not only with the war, but also with winning the trust and respect of the crew

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
19-05-2023
3.5

Perhaps with a better story

Not soon after enjoying the initial CGI planes passing by, I noticed the upcoming gloom of this movie: wooden and stiff dialogue and very poor storytelling and direction. It also has that B-movie smallness to it, with no wide angle shots on the ground to disguise the absence of sets.
3.5

Fear Street part one: 1994

Mysterious killer kills youth

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
17-07-2021
3.5

A hot mess

Sometimes you don't like a movie and move on, and sometimes and it really bugs you - like this one. A disjointed, messy movie that has some uninteresting teenagers making their way through tedious cliche horror events. Vague, boring and uninspired. No, I am not watching the other 'parts'.
3.5

Deep Fear

A sailor rescues two shiprecked people, which leads into an ordeal of crime and shark invested waters

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
24-03-2024
3.5

Another crap shark movie

When the lead is a pumped up bimbo with spot-on make-up even after two deepdives, shot in numerous preposterous shots to show her curves, a movie is pretty much lost. Add crappy acting and a poor script and it becomes hopeless. Two shark attack scenes were surprisingly ok compared to the rest of it.
3.5

Halo: Nightfall

A new type of enemy weapon emerges, so brave soldiers must go back to the Halo to resolve it. I think.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
09-11-2015
3.5

Really drab. feel free to reuse the props in a decent story

Some of it looks satisfactory, but I was bored out of my mind with this extremely poorly paced movie with ultra dull characters chatting and fighting in a completely unconvincing mission in deep space that is immediately and only compromised by..... worms. This is not Halo man.
3.5

Shanghai Fortress

Shanghai defends against an alien invasion. With a big canon.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
31-07-2020
3.5

Arrogant empty shell

How the hell did they get such a big budget to make such bland, generic, lifeless movie? It radiates arrogance. The numerous 'emotional' scenes with cheesy minor piano chords fall flat completely because I didn't know or care who these people are!
3.5

Movies found: 1044 | max movies per page: 10 | Showing: 16 - 25

Previous Next