BoiledDown.netIf everyone's a critic, then so are we! |
Open Water
Scuba diving couple emerges to find the boat not there
Wittenberg
06-08-2023
A nailbiter that kept reeling me in
I wanted to do something else but I could not resist this movie. My complements for making the simple plot and scenery not a limitation but a strength. The natural, almost amateuristic camerawork and non-sensationalist footage of sharks is also a masterstroke making everything up close and personal.Only God Forgives
Drug dealer in Thailand gets caught up a bloody circle of revenge when his brother is killed
Wittenberg
27-10-2013
Bloodred
Dark, bloody and mesmerizing movie that views like a comicbook, the way it slowly serves it's mostly static scenes one by one.Ones Below, The
Happy and pregant couple has dito neighbours living below them, but things get vaul when those neighbours loose their baby
Wittenberg
07-01-2018
Good
A very decent, well acted and engrossing thriller with a good built-up.Olympus has Fallen
Terrorists take over whitehouse, fallen security agent comes to the rescue
Wittenberg
02-01-2014
The same old mistakes
A dark atmosphere and some hefty gung-ho warfare could have made this intense, were it not for the inevitable patriotism and flag waving, annoying Hollywood plot conveniences and stereotype terrorists (oh come on - nuclear launch codes, again?).Older Gods
A man retreats into a house to study the mysterious legacy of his friend, involving something larger than us, even larger than God
Wittenberg
12-10-2023
A decent cosmic horror, lacking some weight
These low budget movies have no choice but being a slow burner, but that need not be a problem if the story supports it. And well, I was quite interested to see where this was going and appreciated the ideas. Ultimately though, it was a little too thin and minimalistic to really leave a mark.Oldboy
A man is held captive for 15 years for unknown reasons, and is out for revenge when he finally gets out.
Wittenberg
12-03-2023
curious revenge tale
A curious revenge tale that benefits from some surrealistic and disorienting elements. Highly original and quite brutal at times. But I must admit that none of it really stuck - i am having a hard time remembering it.Old
People trapped on a secluded beach get old very quickly
Wittenberg
28-08-2021
Attractive mystery let down by words and characters
I love Shyamalan's enticing and mysterious stories, as well as the way he floats the camera through them. So I will probably watch all of them, but unfortunately this one was let down by rather clunky dialogue, delivered unnaturally by odd characters. It felt like watching a play.Offering (aka Abyzou), The
Man secretely wanting to sell his fathers funeral home, has to deal with cleansing it from evil first
Wittenberg
01-07-2023
Waisted
Despite one of the scariest locations I know (morgues), tastefully lit scenery and a promise of creepy Orthodox Jewish reli-horror, this movie was unable to craft it into something scary or interesting. Instead, it has only really, really tiresome loud-noise jumpscares to offer.Oculus
Brother and sister try to get even with a mysticial mirror that causes supernatural drama and terror in their childhood
Wittenberg
21-09-2014
Some scares, a lot of annoyances
They sure know how to do good scares, and there's some nice ideas for the story framework as well. But the present-past alternations gets tiresome quickly, and I was totally put off by the analytical, cold and utterly unconvincing attitude and going-about of the (present day) sister.Occupation Rainfall
On an alien invaded earth, humans and some alied aliens set out find a mysterious rainfall that can save humanity
Wittenberg
03-07-2022
Tiresome scifi bonanza
There's actually some okay stuff here and there: some effects, some scenes, some concepts, some designs. But it's just so bloated and hysteric, like they wanted to include everything they could think of and barf it onto you in an endless stream. Very tiresome.Occhi Chiusi
A woman is living isolated in the mountains with her daughter, and things get weird. Or something.
Wittenberg
13-02-2024
Not only hard to see, also hard to grasp
With dark and often very closed-up imagery, and depressing and slow flow, it certainly has a ominous and unsettling vibe to it. But I found the story too unclear and vague to make much of it. I am not sure what it was about, and that's not always a good thing.Oblivion
Engineer is looking after droids doing their last business on earthbefore mankind heads for titan. But is it like that?
Wittenberg
19-05-2013
pretty sci-fi mindmangler
Extremely beautiful and a pleasant SF mindbender. Some ideas we have seen before, and it maybe a bit sterile, but it blends very well.Obi-Wan Kenobi
Obi-Wan is forced to come into action when young princess Leia is abducted by the Empire
Wittenberg
12-08-2022
A rather tired bulge of more Starwars
It's always nice to have another fix of Starwars, but frankly it is getting increasingly harder to get high from it. This series was low-energy and somehow has no impact on the saga. There are also some poorly choreographed action scenes that may have worked in the 70's, but look ridiculous today.OA, The
A missing blind girl one day returns with sight, and an amazing story about the afterlife she entrusts to a small group of people
Wittenberg
25-12-2023
Problematic, but the premise may pull you through
Another Netflix endeavor with a mysterious story that is only just able to make you watch the whole thing, but requires you to sit through excruciatingly slow passages and episodes, flat one-trick characters, many dubious plot-points and even some crinche here and there. The twist felt uninspired.Nymphomaniac II
The nymph carries on to tell her live story to her new analytic friend
Wittenberg
10-08-2015
Dark and unpleasant but somehow very relevant too
Darker than the previous one, (even) more difficult to digest too. But something about it feels relevant and it is quite an intense experience that keeps you gazing in awe.Nymphomaniac I
Man brings home a woman he found lying on the street, who then shares with him her life as a nymph.
Wittenberg
27-01-2015
A succesfull approach for a subject like this
I needed some time to make up my mind. Never quite sure whether it is erotic or just plain nasty, whether it is pretentious or unique and brave. Overall, not a pleasant experience, but one with impact and substance, and some images that keep on haunting me.Nun II, The
It's the Nun II
Wittenberg
22-12-2023
Good looking borefest with no story
Much like it's predecessor, there is no shortage of very moody and nicely lit scenes. Also like it's predecessor, there is a serious lack of a story to drive it along, instead it features just people moving extremely slowly from one jumpscare to the next. Remarkably boring.Nun, The
A horrorstory based around the creepy nun from The Conjuring 2
Wittenberg
10-12-2018
Relies on scary nuns in alleys, not on a good story
While the dark abbey and nun figure do look terrifying, it soon becomes evident that this simply a stack of people slowly walking through creepy corridors and slowly turning their heads towards the next jumpscare. The story or built-up is seriously lacking and it started to bore me.Nude Nuns with Big Guns
After being sold an abused as a sex slave, a nun sets out to take revenge.
Wittenberg
10-04-2016
Nice and campy
Much like Tarantino movies, it shamelessly celebrates campy, violent, badly acted, poorly edited movies taking please in sweaty Mexican style landscapes. It does so quite well, but it also doesn't do much more than that. And the guns weren't that big either.November Man, The
Retired CIA top wonderboy is asked for one more gig. He steps in because someone close to him is involved...
Wittenberg
31-05-2015
Fine espionage
A decent, classic espionage action flick. It is a bit low on standout moments though, and the cockiness and skills of the main character can be too much at times.Nova
On a spaceship to mars, an android is struggling with acceptance by the human captain, other androids and her own developing emotions
Wittenberg
29-01-2023
Looks and feels like a school project
Rather than pointing out the numerous problems in this (homemade?) movie, a more important question would be if the fundamental philosophical issues raised somehow make the them irrelevant, merely an accessory tool for conveying a thought provoking message? No.Northman, The
When his father is killed, a young viking grows up with nothing but revenge on his mind
Wittenberg
17-04-2022
Great as a spectacle, but average in involvement
A big, brutal, sweaty and intense historic epic, that I was spectating and enjoying rather than feeling. Perhaps because all characters continuously speak in this these articulated, poetic, over-dramatic phrases, which kind of dehumanizes them. It worked in Lighthouse, here it alienates.Nope
When a horse ranch family finds a otherworldy presence is lurking in the skies above them, they set out to capture it on film and get rich
Wittenberg
21-08-2022
somewhat odd and different but very tasty
The main thing going through my mind was how slightly odd and different this is. The characters, the story, the humor, the flow, it's all a bit odd, but in a refreshingly blunt way. It provides plenty to ponder on, and contains some of the most interesting and well done UFO scenes I know.Non Stop
Air marshall tries to deal with a terrorist threatening to kill the passages on his flight, getting himself framed in the process
RockmeNow
17-09-2015
Over the top in a nice way
I don't buy many aspects of the story, but I enjoyed it anyway!Wittenberg
24-02-2015
Good old fashioned suspense
An reasonably intense thriller with a constantly high adrenaline level, and a pleasant 'old fashioned' simplicity of execution. Near the end they go a little overboard with the whodunnit game, and the far fetched motives and plans of the terrorist are yeh-right.Noise
When a man start looking into his father's life and the factory he worked in, he becomes more insane as more secrets emerge
Wittenberg
22-03-2023
ok but lots of loose ends
Although we liked this movie, with it's relaxed but pleasantly mysterious atmosphere and decent characters, it felt badly insecure about the story it wanted to tell. Was it about the factory? The father? The mother? Was noise really so much of an theme to warrant the title? Hmmm.Nocebo
A woman gets sick after being biten by a tick, so she seeks help from her Filipina household who uses folklore on her
Wittenberg
29-03-2023
Fair enough, but lacks intensity
It's a decent movie with a twist that, even though you can see it coming, gives it some depth. It's just that it never becomes really scary or intense. It remains a bit lightweight.Noah
God asks Noah to built a boat to save all animals from the upcoming global flood
Wittenberg
21-09-2014
Strong but very religious (duh!)
Strong and well made epic. Once they are on the boat, the endless contemplations about God's intentions and whether killing baby's is ok, is quite a lot to take in.No One Will Save You
A girl versus aliens invading her home
Wittenberg
20-03-2024
Mostly a decent home invasion movie
I liked the idea of a single, cute girl in a dress facing such dreadful odds, and it certainly has some strong scenes and moments. After a while though, I thought it became a bit directionless, and the surreal dreamy ending felt slapped on without really knowing what it was supposed to mean.No Hard Feelings
A girl gets a car - if she dates an undatable
Wittenberg
28-01-2024
Another fine romcom with not much else
It's good for a few laughs and some well dosed emotional depth. But that, unfortunately, seems to be the review I end up writing every freaking 'romcom' out there. I wish it would have found away to rise above this.No Country for Old Men
A sherrif, hunter and hitman get involved when a bag of money is left after a deadly showdown in the desert
RockmeNow
30-12-2014
Intense movie
This movie sucks you right in, forces the viewer to smell the desert and all the rotten things that will happen later on. Great acting, intense experience...Wittenberg
21-09-2014
Hot and involving
The Texas desert heat oozes of the screen, as does a firework display of class acting. The slow pacing only contributes to the constant feeling of stress and dredd of things to come.Ninjago
The green ninja is having daddy issues, so he and his team venture into the jungle to find the ultimate ultimate weapon to defeat him
Wittenberg
11-10-2017
Unbalanced
These LEGO movies will deliver the frantic action and fun, but I found it an unbalanced with a restless first half and then too much over-emotional scenes in the second one. But who am I? My son rated it 9.5.Nightingale, The
After unspeakable cruelty was done to a woman and her family, she chases down the perpetrators through the Tasmanian bush, with the aid of a native aboriginal
Wittenberg
12-05-2020
Heavy, but very good
It covers a lot of heavy-handed subjects (racism, revenge, rape, murder, repression) and inevitably features some tough scenes. But it has all been done really well. I liked how during the revenge part she remained fragile and insecure, and didn't have sudden superskills that came out of nowhere.Nightflyers
The crew on a spaceship, on it's way to make contact with alien lifeforms, finds itself in more and more peril as they come closer
Wittenberg
18-03-2019
These poor series still contain enough mystery to make it worthwhile
So for this monumentally important mission, they assembled the most insecure, insubordinate, fashion-conscious and unstable crew they could find and make them improvise the entire mission in an insanely incoherent way. But apparently I love space mystery so much that I still watched it. All of it.Night House, The
After her husband commits suicide, the widow starts to experience strange things in the secluded house he built
Wittenberg
24-01-2022
A subtle but very satisfying horror
Wow, this really worked for me. The horror elements are subtle and tasteful, the evolving mystery is enticing and the element of grief is mixed in well. But mostly, I was quite stunned with the lead actress, who totally nails it and makes everything work beautifully.Next
A guy can see two minutes into the future, which brings him into trouble when he is asked to help prevent a terrorist attack
Wittenberg
20-12-2014
Idea not fully utilized
It's a nice idea that provides some fair entertainment. But a nuclear terrorist attack is not the most inspirational thing they could have done with it. The 'gift' soon becomes gimmicky and the story a little standard.Neon Demon, The
Unbearably beautiful girl tries a career at modelling, but her beauty leads to a dark place
Wittenberg
07-12-2016
Beautiful contrasts
The beauty of the girl amidst the cold neon lights and people, which I guess symbolizes the harsh nature of the modelling world, works out great. It then builts up to an even greater contrast with death and gore, without ever becoming cheap or revolting. Wow.Nekromantik
Couple has a fascination for collecting bodyparts, but when he brings an entire corps to have sex with, it puts their relationship to the test
Wittenberg
29-07-2022
Unpleasant but enticing curiosity
It is made poorly and looks amateuristic, but the sight of someone licking the eye-socket of a decayed corpse still makes this have an impact way bigger than it's budget would have you believe. Vile and uncomfortable, but also unique, brave and an interesting niche product to have experienced. Once.Neighbors
Young couple with a baby has a fraternity move in next door. The war begins
Wittenberg
15-03-2015
Watching people having fun wasn't much fun
The lead actors put in a lot of energy and effort into it, but cannot save this mediocre comedy with a shortage of good jokes. The endless fraternity partying and self-contempted mayhem was rather exhausting to me.Nebraska
A son goes on a trip with his dementing father who thinks he won a million dollar
RockmeNow
10-01-2015
A movie to remember
Touching and impressive movie about unfillfilled dreams, both the complexity and simplicity of growing old, and the love of a son for his fatherNaked Lunch
Cockroach exterminator gets intoxicated by the poisonous gas and a surreal, bizarre story starts. Like typewriters that are mucus producing alien heads.
Wittenberg
05-09-2014
Bizarre, they way some like it
A little slowish perhaps, but pleasantly bizarre, strange and filthy in true Cronenberg style.My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell it to
Brother and sister need blood for their brother who has a very special condition
Wittenberg
29-06-2023
Different and unpleasant, and definitely worthwhile.
There's something quite unsettling about seeing normal people processing heavy dead bodies, especially when the atmosphere and acting is natural and plain. The special 'patient' even manages to evoke feelings of sympathy.Mutant Girl Squad
A girl with a mutated knive hand joins a group of other mutant girls to make a stand to those who oppose them
Wittenberg
28-04-2023
Outrageously extreme yet still slightly boring
I really wanted to like this more, as it is a deliciously bizarre Powerrangers with gore, fountains of blood and insane mutations like a chainsaw tentacle coming from someone's butt. Fantastic anarchy, but I also noticed it is utterly flat and empty, making me forget this movie in mere days.Murder Mystery 2
Murder solving couple takes a much needed break on a distant island, but soon enough they're at it again
Wittenberg
08-04-2023
Formulaic slapstick with too little good jokes
I can see what they are going for, and objectively all the ingredients are here for a shot of uncomplicated amusement. I just thought the jokes were not all that, and everything is so safe, formulaic and predictable it feels like you have already seen it - and will forget about it tomorrow.Mummy, The
Modernday thief digs up a mummy that wasn't supposed to be found, for good reason
Wittenberg
27-12-2017
Underperforms in many fields
A surprisingly boring flick that feels like it was made ten years too late and does a lot of things wrong. I was especially annoyed by the humorless role of the female interest, it never got scary or tense and it severely lacked some good music.Mulholland Drive
Woman on her way to make it in Hollywood, finds a mysterious woman in her bathroom (probably not the best summary).
Wittenberg
25-11-2021
Should have triggered me, but didn't
The Lynch-weirdness comes in late and it quite small doses, so mostly it actually felt like a movie of girlfriends going on an adventure. I love being puzzled by surrealism, but in here it didn't seem to trigger me, or the subjects and themes were just too plain.Movie 43
Teenagers scout the internet for a movie that doesn't exist, taking them through various bizarre movies as they go
Wittenberg
28-01-2014
fascinatingly unfunny
In itself I can see potential in the jokes on offer. But I just gazed at these clumsy, grime and bizarre sketches without laughing once, becoming almost fascinated in the process. It's one of those 'You need the right drug first' movies, but if you find which one, it could be hysterical.Mountain Between Us, The
Man and woman survice a crashlanding in the snowy mountains, and now face survival as well as a developing forbidden love between them
Wittenberg
14-09-2020
Yeh sort of works
Throughout the film there's alternating scenes of them taking a few more steps, and then a much longer scene of them resting and developing feelings for each other amidst all misery. Both are fine, but none of them felt very profound.Mountain
A documentary that explores our relationship with mountains
Wittenberg
04-03-2023
A poetic analysis
Instead of a dry analytic approach, it chooses a more poetic blend of music, philosophic narration and plenty of spectacular images. Very beautiful, but I remained on my couch nonetheless. And while the sport scenes are probably rightfully part of the story, they felt a bit dissonant to me.Mother!
In an isolated house, a woman struggles with her husband's increasing tendency to have strangers stay over, up until extreme and paranormal levels (this description probably sucks, you tell me!)
Wittenberg
28-09-2017
A different kind of horror
A reminder that horror and unrest can come in many shapes, not just ghouls and ghosts. A disturbing but very engrossing experience which I thought was fresh, well acted and intense. It felt great to see a movie again that sticks with you and leaves a goddamn impression.Mother of No Destination, A
First, people that discover the immenent end of the world are hunted down, then the remaining people on a space ark are terrorized
Wittenberg
03-08-2021
Let's call it art
Listen, I really tried to look at this as a completely homemade, completely amateur movie, but even then I did not find any redeeming qualities. Maybe it's deliberately trying to be as bad as can be, so that it becomes art or intoxicating. I must admit I felt weird after watching it.Movies found: 1043 | max movies per page: 50 | Showing: 351 - 400
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