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Ted

A boy's teddybear comes to live and they become best friends.... which becomes problematic when he is an adult

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-02-2013

Should have been even funnier

The whole idea is so outstandingly funny that I couldn't help feeling somewhat disappointed. But it IS funny.
7.5

Tau

Woman is kidnapped by a dude working on some AI thing, so she tries to gain the trust of the artificial intercom housekeeper in order to escape

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-06-2018

Lovely story but difficult to execute - and it shows

While I loved the idea, it would all depend on convincing dialogue and acting whether it would work out. Unfortunately, both are below par and the movie is too slow or mediocre to keep me interested.
6

T-34

A Russian ace tank commander is captured by the germans, but gets a unique opportunity to escape. With a tank, of course.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
06-12-2020

Tank porn. It exists.

A rather bold action flick showing loads of tanks with super slowmo shell penetrations and sweaty screaming Russians. I feared it was more of a videoclip than a movie, but the story catches up and makes it worthwhile and quite exciting indeed. Perfect for tank aficionados like me.
7.5

Synchronicity

Small teams get a timemachine to run work, one of them gets caught up in paradoxes

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
17-06-2018

The story is there. Execution is not.

There's probably a really clever, if not somewhat difficult to follow, story in here. But the really lackluster execution, dull performances, suspiciously limited locations and depressing dark colors made me struggle to care... no matter how much bladerunner music they throw in!
5

Swiss Army Man

A lost and stranded guy finds a corpse on the beach, who's 'special powers' and friendship help him to make the journey home

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
13-08-2017

Just because it's unique doens't mean I like farts

I guess there's points for originality and it sort of works in it's own special way, but I couldn't shake the feeling of being pranked into watching someone's bizarre fart joke fantasies.
6.5

Sweet Home

A group of very different people in an appartment building is faced with fighting monsters

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
23-02-2021

The characters hit a nerve I did not know I had

The groundwork was promising; colorful cartoon-like imagery, pleasantly weird monsters and potentially interesting group dynamics. But none of the people is particularly likable. In fact I started to despise many of them up until the point I could no longer watch it. Never had this before.
5

Svart Krabba

In a fictive war, soldiers are send into the night on skates, to cross a lake for a world saving mission

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-05-2022

Decent little war movie that does things differently.

Overall it doesn't feel very plausible, and some of the combat feels slightly tame and lacking suspense. But it's different, varied and builts up to a unexpectedly large finale and plot twist. An amusing watch for sure.
7

Suspiria (2018)

Talented ballet dancer is accepted in a mysterious danceschool, were something occult is going on

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-05-2019

Uneasy

While not as deeply disturbing as the of hype would make you believe, it was uneasy for sure. I liked it; photography was beautiful, and the slow tension and mystery keeps you hooked. But at the same time, I was slightly disappointed for not requiring therapy afterwards.
7.5

Superdeep, The

Russian horror about a rescue team entering the deepest researchfacility on earth where strange things have been occuring

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
10-07-2021

Plenty to complain about, but enough going for it

Maybe it didn't quite nail the claustrophobic atmosphere the way it could have, it aches towards a B-movie and most characters are unlikable and simplistic. But I gotta say: the overall concept is creepy and done nicely, and the mold/spore enemy original and impressive. Nice music, too
7

Superbad

Two constantly arguing but inseparable friends on a mission to get booze and laid on the last party of the year

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-08-2018

The Tarantino of highschool movies

The constant and lengthy foul-mouthed dialogues and contemplations create an atmosphere reminiscent of Tarantino movies. It's kind of like an adult version of highschool movies. Cool.
7.5

Sunshine

On a spacemission to reignate the sun, one ordeal leads to another when they decide to make a small change in the missionplan

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
15-06-2013

Beauty and class can outshine anything

This amount of loopholes and illogical elements in the plot would have crippled most movies. But Sunshine is so beautiful, classy and exciting that it outshines them easily. I also love the self aware, scientific-ethical attitude of the crew.
8.5

Sully

On the miracle emergency plane landing on the Hudson where everyone walked away

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-08-2017

Over dramatized

The landing appears faithfully recreated and was thrilling to see, but the events surrounding it felt over dramatized. Also, the research committee seemed strangely angry and eager to discredit the pilot's doings, and almost started crying when they couldn't. What??
6.5

Sucker Punch

Girl is institutionalized, but lives violent fantasies while dancing which help her escape it the end. Or something.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
20-04-2014

Violent video clip, done with much love

Easy to fault, but I was amused by the violent, fabulously stylized, unearthly, anachronistic action, as well as the moody and steamy atmosphere. Absorb it like a videoclip, then you may get it.
7.5

Stowaway

When a mars mission equiped for a crew of three has a crew of four

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-05-2021

Interesting and focussed, but a bit mellow

It brings down the story to the essence, features fine design and actors, and certainly had us entertained. But the big finale seems a bit cumbersome and unlikely, and part of me thought the impossible ethical decisions could have been more heart wrenching, and tension more nail-biting.
7

Still Alice

A woman is diagnosed with Early-onset Alzheimer's Disease and tries to deal with it together with her family

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
02-03-2015

Impressive

An eye-opener for everybody, including myself, who had not been directly confronted before with the devastating consequences of Early-onset Alzheimer's Disease. There are many good reasons why Julianne Moore won an Oscar for her role in this impressive movie.
8

Stepbrothers

Two senile and failed men must coexist in one house when they become stepbrothers

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
01-06-2013

Embarrasingly funny

Part of me thinks it could have been funnier given the two lead actors, but it is sill good fun.
7

Stealth

Three pilots in super modern jets must deal wih a fourth, unmanned sleathy jet.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
07-04-2013

Saved by coolness

Just when I thought I wouldn't be able to make it through the jetfighter-movie cliches and flawed characters and plot, this movie is saved partially by some decent action scenes and cool moments.
6.5

Starving Games, The

A parody of guess which movie

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
21-08-2015

A turkey of the second kind

A rather dumb and unfunny fest of bad jokes, though some might still accidentally trigger a slight smile now and then. Not the worst of bad parodies.
4

Starship Troopers: Traitor of Mars

It's not just bugs that run over Mars, but an evil politician tries to destroy the entire planet - inhabitants included. Troopers to the rescue.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-10-2017

Ruined by the characters

Some of it looks dated, some of it looks quite good, some action scenes I liked. But it's all in vain, because of the ultra cheesy, cringe worthy characters that make it feel like a Powerrangers episode... but not in a good, satirical way like the original managed to pull of.
4

Starship Troopers

Friends sign in to combat terror from space. Both their skills and friendship are put to the test.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-08-2015

A brutal space fight that requires the right mindset

It all depends on whether you can appreciate the deeper meaning of incredibly cheesy barbie people have soap opera relationship quarrels - followed by dismembering fights with aliens.
8

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

No point in describing this any other way than: the finale

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-01-2020

Perfectly unimpressive

What a perfect Starwars movie. It has everything you could possibly want, done in a tasteful and beautiful manner. Yet I walk out the theater feeling indifferent, numb and with no desire to discuss, read up, rethink or relive any of it. I wonder if it's just fatigue, or something more fundamental
7

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

The last of the rebellion is being hunted down, so they need Skywalker to bring them hope. And a lot of other stuff besides.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-01-2018

Too much?

Despite a couple of awesome scenes and a praiseworthy new tone and style, I felt underwhelmed. I am getting tired of some of the star wars ways, the casino sidestory was awful, I didn't like Luke and I was bored during the endless contemplating of the force and good and evil. It's getting too much.
7

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

A map to the location of vanished Luke skywalker causes good and bad to hunt down one another, and a new giant new planet killer device lurks.
average 8.5

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
03-01-2016

And the saga continues!

This incredible movie fully lives up to the expectations. Prepare to be sucked into the star wars universe right from the start. The storyline of the initial 3 star wars movies is partially re-used with the offspring of the initial characters in the lead. Nevertheless, I enjoyed every minute of it!
9

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
30-12-2015

A great, big bad continuation of a great movie

A wonderful blast that looks and feels fantastic, and adds some nice designs and elements to the Star Wars universe. The story though, felt more like an ode to the originals rather adding a lot to it. Building an even bigger deathstar thing was cheap.
8

Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones

Obi finds out about the clone army, and lots of other stuff going on too.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-08-2015

Mixed up

While it contains several outstanding scenes and sound effects (seismic charge!) to make it worthwhile, it is let down big time by an overload of boring politics, cringe worthy attempts at drama and awkward slapstick.
7

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace

In a mission to save a planet from a hostile takover, two jedi stumble across a boy with great promise.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-09-2013

Majestic saga lost in space

It had everything you could possibly wish for: spaceships, droids, lightsabers, jedi's, aliens and saga. It has a phenomenal pod race. But because of multiple factors, it is a somewhat dull experience.
7

Star Trek into Darkness

The pursuit of a terrorist into Klingon space gets the Enterprise into trouble
average 8.5

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
17-09-2015

A great action-packed movie

Lots of action, space ships and great visuals, which just happen to take place in the Star Trek universe (but nevertheless also highly accessible to non-trekkies)
8.5

robocop
robocop
24-09-2013

I am robocop

testing what will happen if a third reviewer loads
9

Show previous reviews Hide previous reviews
Wittenberg
Wittenberg
22-09-2013

Darkness on the light side

A colorful, beautiful and exciting space adventure that is also quite funny at times.
8

Star Trek Beyond

A brute force enemy causes the Enterprise to crashland. The survivors must find away to release the hostages and prevent further mayhem

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
24-04-2017

Awkward and off

The scenes of destruction are mighty, but overall this really felt off. They totally overdid the constant humor which started to feel like slapstick. The story and events also felt awkward and cheesy like the original series, with embarrassing scenes like driving around a motorbike to divert aliens
6

Stalingrad

In WWII the battle for Stalingrad, Russians and Germans fight for a strategically situated building and the few women left in the vicinity

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
05-10-2014

Actors and story can't keep the few impressive scenes afloat

A good looking - if not over processed - movie, with some very intense scenes that will remain stuck with me. But the rest of story is struggling to bind it all together, with slow and clumsy scenes that fail to show the terror that these men must have been in.
6.5

Stairs, The

Boy and grandpa find stairs in the woods an go missing. Years later, a group of other hikers find them, unaged. And the stairs. And some demon.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-09-2021

Uninspired and unsuccesful horror

The opening gets by (barely), but the adult hikers are a rather annoying bunch (the metalguy is almost unwatchable) and so are the rather uninteresting and vague events they encounter. It's allover they place, like they just threw in some random horror things to fill it up.
3

Squid Game

Out of money and out of a future, a small-time hustler accepts an invitation to mysterious game that offers a great price

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-11-2021

Unique, dark and bright

While the viral success and hype it generated may seem a bit much, I would agree that it is a fresh, well made series that make you eager for the next episode. The bright colors contrast nicely with the dark theme, you get to like the protagonists and loathe the bad ones.
7.5

Spy

Condemned to work in a basement supporting agents doing all the action, a CIA agent finally gets a change to do some fieldwork of her own

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
14-08-2016

Dare I say hillarious?

In a time where 'comedies' merely evoke a vague smile at best, I was delighted to find this genuinely funny movie that had me laughing out loud several times. Deliciously nasty and hysterical.
8

Sputnik

Sputnik cosmonauts crash on earth, one of them is carying something unearthly with him. A doctor is asked to investigate.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
26-08-2020

A bit slow

While subjects like this are always a killer, and I liked the Russian take and atmosphere for a change, I found the movie to be rather sluggish. There's a lot of talking and walking through the hallways with too little excitement or tension, nor did I find everything very credible.
6.5

SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water, The

The recipe for krabburgers gets lost, so Spongebob and friends must travel above the surface to find it.
average 7.8

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
17-02-2015

Hilarious fun in the sponge bob universe!

Great movie for both kids and parents, with impressive 3d effects enhancing the overall experience. Do not try to touch the soap bubbles with cannon balls (just to warn you)....
8

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
08-02-2015

Whack!

Of course you have to GET the hysteria and oddity that is Spongebob. But if you do, you're in for a funny and whacky movie bursting with colors and pleasant anarchy. Incidentally, the 3D version features some of the the most effective and sharpest looking 3D yet!
7.5

Split

Three girls are kidnapped by a man with multiple identities

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-05-2017

Multiple Personality Disorder annoys me more than it scares me

Frankly, I was somewhat bored and agitated by the multiple identities, especially the laughable behavior of the supposed 9 year old. Apart from the identities there's wasn't much in there, nor did I find it very particularly scary. It's okay, but underwhelming.
6.5

Spine of the Night, The

Animation about a power struggle involving witchcraft

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
12-11-2021

Plenty to like but not to feel

Overall a satisfactory experience for animation enthusiast like myself, with some imaginative action and storytelling. But with no background story and no real character to know or love, it's doesn't really hit you emotionally.
7

Spectre

Just when the 00 team is cancelled, Bond faces the architect of all his pain

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
16-05-2016

Tight

With a sense of perfection in each scene, the the movie is confident enough to never rush or over-do things, instead rolling along nice and tight. I found Bond himself is a little too 1-dimensional with his grumpiness and fearlessness. The man seems utterly bored with his job.
8

Spectral

Through their special visors, soldiers start to see ghostly figures that start coming after them

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
04-06-2017

Decent ingredients but no cake

This started off ok with decent looks and characters, and initially it served the mysterious premise nice and easy. But as it progresses, there's not much more than chases and shootouts that feel distant and never truly excite. Also, the all-knowing McGuyver scientist was getting on my nerves.
6

Spectacular Now, The

About adolescents and the challenges and choices they have to face during the process of growing up

RockmeNow
RockmeNow
24-01-2014

How to deal with adolescent hardships (in a non-comic way)

No action or comedy flick, but a nice movie when you are in the right mood for an insightful trip into the world of adolescents and the challenges they have to face. Key words: future plans and careers, (badly ending) relationships, and alcohol abuse (to name just a few we all know so well ;) )
7

Spawn

Killed assassin makes a deal with the devil to lead his army with new superpowers, and in return he may see his wife again

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
25-10-2017

Not brilliant, but has plenty of tricks to make it work

People weren't to keen on this comic adaptation, but I am quite ok with it. There's a special kind overacting that seems just right for a movie like this, I liked the dark theme and some of the fx, the clown is just awesome and the movie simply entertains.
7

Space Sweepers

Space scavengers find a girl that is also bomb, which marks the beginning of a wild ride

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
18-04-2021

Could have been fresh, but gave a headache instead

While I like the designs, FX and fresh vibe, I found it hard to get into the restless and erratic style of the movie, and didn't attach to any of the cartoonish, one-dimensional characters.
6

Soul (2022), The

Prosecutor dying of cancer takes on a murder case that reveals dark secrets and transplants of more than just cells

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
29-05-2022

Probably a brillant story but failed in presentation

I can appreciate the deep, well thought out story that stacks several layers of twists on each other, providing a real thinker of a crime story with perhaps a dash of horror. But it is presented so slowly en depressingly that I struggled to notice or care - and to stay awake too.
5

Soul

Just before a breakthrough live performance, a jazz musician has an accident and get assigned a quest somewhere in the afterlife

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
22-01-2021

Beautifully abstract and heartfelt.

Another bold Pixar endeavor that doesn't shy away from emotions, highly abstract concepts and symbolism. Apparently, kids get it instantly, but I needed some time to figure it out. Any which way, it is just lovely, beautiful and wonderful.
8

Somnus

The crew of a spaceship are in danger when the board computer turns rogue

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
28-12-2017

Slow and bad looking

The atmosphere and some of the interior design were promising. But soon it dwells into endless, static conversations, misguided and pointless scenery (what were those jellyfish? What's with the train?) and increasingly worse visuals. With that creature on asteroid-city, they seemed to have given up.
3.5

Solo: A Star Wars Story

Young Han is seperated from his girl, and goes through great lengths and cosmic adventures to get back and save her

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-06-2018

A welcome change

Contains just the right amount of Star Wars icons to make it connect to the universe, but never lazily riding it. By focusing on a small group of people, I felt a much more intimate connection than the main movies. The portayal of the younger Han actually worked for me. Funny and exciting, too.
8

Snowpiercer

Survivors of a frozen world found shelter on a selfsupporting train, driving endlessly circles. But a war of classes rages.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
03-08-2014

Interesting

At first I was put off by the cliched revolt of lowerclass people in dirty clothes and low lighting conditions. But as they fight their way to the higher class front of the train, color comes in literally and figuratively, bringing to live this interesting metaphor of real live society.
7

Snow White and the Huntsman, The

Vicious queen takes over the land in a quest for eternal beauty, and hunts down the princess who has the power to top her

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
08-10-2013

Pleasant surprise

Expecting this to be a loud and dumb 'modern take' on the fairytale, I was pleasantly surprised. The pacing is right, it never goes over the top, it looks great and the actors deliver, especially Theron!
7.5

Snatched

When noone's left to join a womans non-refundable trip to Ecuador, all that's left is her mother.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
01-04-2018

Fine, could have done with more Amy mayhem

I like Amy Schumer, and she lifts this one above the overpopulated 'amusing comedy with a few laugh out loud moments' - but not by much. Almost as though she held back a bit.
6.5

Slenderman

Some kids summon slenderman

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
17-08-2019

Slenderman deserves better

I really like the slenderman figure and wanted to like this, but the lead actresses don't really convince, and everything is just moving very slowly from one scare to the next, filling up time in a story that feels a bit loose and lacking ideas, and ultimately, never gets really scary.
5

Skyscraper

Man is going to save his family from the highest skycraper in the word. On fire. With one leg. With crooks inside.

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
27-01-2019

The fun to be had!

No doubt we could make a long list of things that are dumb or preposterous about this movie. But I thought they nailed that lovely vibe of action-disaster movies of yesteryear, and I honestly can't think of a recent movie that made me enjoy myself and sit on the edge of my seat like this one!
7.5

Skyline

Room full of pretty people must survive an invasion of ugly aliens

Wittenberg
Wittenberg
02-11-2013

Good looking B movie

An unusual cross between a B movie with dull actors having tedious arguments, and very decent effects and designs. Guess what's more important in the end?
6.5

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