BoiledDown.netIf everyone's a critic, then so are we! |
Polar
A hitman's pension doesn't go as planned
Wittenberg
27-11-2020
Original, funky and violent
A mixture of some pretty grim action and violence with 'hip' characters, music and wacky titles. For a moment I was afraid the latter was a mask to hide mediocrity, but I have the say Mikkelsen's oodles of charisma, as well as a decent plot twist at the end, make it rise above the norm.Pleasure
A young woman in pursuit of a career in the adult movie industry
Wittenberg
19-03-2023
An intense and probably revealing inside look full of contrasts
I found it especially good at creating contrasts: how the atmosphere changes before, during and after a shoot, and how she continues to pursue her ambitions despite the demeaning and sometimes brutal treatment. The clean, observant, non-dramatic style makes it feel like a documentary.Play Dead
A girl fakes death to get into a morgue, where she needs to retrieve evidence against her brother. But there is unsuspected danger inside.
Wittenberg
11-11-2023
Maybe too long and too unlikely, but still a thrilling ride
The premise and story are far-fetched, and I thought the acting lacked finesse. But this still manages to roll out quite an exciting, pretty tense thriller/horror for the most part. Unfortunately it drags on for too long, becomes tiring and even more implausible. Still, enjoyable stuff.Planes
Planes flying around in the world of Cars (1)
Wittenberg
20-04-2014
What it needs to be
Not much in the way of originality, but adept at telling an effective, colorful and easy to follow story for the target audience.RockmeNow
29-11-2013
Planes flying around, that's about it
Ok, so it looks like the world of Cars (1), but with planes in it, which could be entertaining. But actually it is not, since they forgot to write a decent story. Too bad...Plagues of Breslau, The
Female detective on a case of horrific murders, each copying an execution method of the 18th century
Wittenberg
27-05-2020
A fair Se7en clone
The story, of course, is somewhat similar to Se7en, but the atmosphere is different and not as dark en depressing. I thought it was okay, but it can be illogical at times, the detectives' flat, emotionless personality wasn't helping and the version I saw was let down by subpar english voiceovers.Piranha 3D
Prehistoric piranhas attack horny party teens on boats and beaches
Wittenberg
22-05-2016
Quite good for what it is
Overall, this mixture of bad movie making, bloody horror, crap fx and boobs (and other genitalia) make for some for remarkably satisfying brainless popcorn entertainment.Pioneer
After a dive accident during the construction of an underwater oil pipeline, one survivor sets off to investigate the truth about what went wrong
Wittenberg
22-11-2014
Genuine and exciting, but full of wankers
I liked the authentic feel throughout, as well as the restrained acting and good underwater scenes. Something was not quite right with the characters though, as everyone was sort of a zombie ignorant ass about everything that was going on.Phoenix Project, The
Four scientists in a garage try to revive dead animals
Wittenberg
08-03-2015
Experiment failed
This could and should have been a geeky mind bending gem like Primer. But it is achingly slow at times, the science is underpowered and the scientists behave unnatural. Especially that Carter guy, who single-handedly wrecks this movie with really painful, unwatchable and ridiculous overacting.Phoenix incident, The
You know those 4 skatedude guys who went missing in Arizona? It was aliens man!
Wittenberg
23-12-2015
Too shaky
Hurah! It's not just found footage; it's loud, noisy and restless shaky footage too. Which makes this mockumentary, shoving a conspiracy down our throat, rather tiresome and lame.Philomena
A journalist and an elderly lady are on a quest to find her son who she had to give up for adoption fifty years ago
RockmeNow
09-02-2014
Light hearted drama that is actually worth a watch
Sympathetic movie with a touching story based on true events (including the dubious role of the catholic church in child adoptions in Ireland), and very convincing acting by Judi Dench. Ideal movie for men who want to show their partner they actually have a sensitive side as well....Phantom
Russian sub must carry a mysterious crew and device along on a mission
Wittenberg
16-03-2014
Good intentions drowned in mistakes
Some fine actors and submarine drills can't compensate for a miscasted Duchovny and slow and insecure script. Most exciting scenes are destroyed when, in the heat of a moment, Duchovny asks "what are you doing now", and the captain actually pauses his command and starts to explain!!!!Pet Semetary (2019)
A family man discovers a semetary that brings back dead pets. What else could it work on?
Wittenberg
25-06-2023
not scary enough, too little to standout
While it has some good moments, like the backstory of his wife that is actually more scary than the main plot, overall I found it a bit plain and predictable. The scares don't go deep.Perfection, The
Rivalry between two cello players leads to extremes
Wittenberg
22-09-2019
competent
A competent mix of horror, thriller and drama that's different and refreshing, and has several satisfying plot twists on offer. The 'rewinding' sounds and sights seemed below the class of this movie, but that's about it.Perfect Blue
Pop idol band girl switches to acting, which quickly turns dark and strange
Wittenberg
02-06-2019
Great change of tone
With it's minimal animation, stiff voiceovers and Japanese girlpop power vibe, it took me some effort to get into this. But this beautifully contrasts with the dark and vile direction it takes on later, and then, when it starts to mess with time and your head as well, the effort had been worth it!Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters
Demigod kids confront Kronos because their precious summercamp is in jeopardy. No really.
Wittenberg
20-08-2014
I doubt even teenagers will really fall for it
It just - BAM- puts you in this fantasyworld with gods and magic without ever introducing us to anything, without building tension of mystery. There's some charm in the fantasy elements, but mostly it is a childish bunch of whining teenagers. There's also a lack of sea monsters.Peppermint
When her husband and daughter are buraly murderedand the villains walk free, she seeks revenge on ther own
Wittenberg
03-03-2019
Exchanging the sexes isn't enough
This really is the Punisher but with a female lead and lacking a dark costume. While this may give us an entertaining action revenge flick, it was too familiar, I was annoyed by the army of stereotype badguys and lead character's deep hatred inside (I assume there was) didn't quite come out.Pearl
A farm girl wants to make it big in dancing. By any means necessary.
Wittenberg
29-01-2023
Good combi of drama and horror
An atmospheric flick that is in no rush to reach the horror, but instead gives ample space to lead actress Mia, who caries this movie wonderfully from the beginning until the end.Passengers
On a hightech spaceship carrying 5000 cryosleeping persons to a new earth, one of them wakes up 90 years too early
Wittenberg
22-04-2017
A flawed love story
If found the idea more interesting than execution, which suffers from rather flat, over-directed characters trying to deliver what is eventually a love story in space. The tech/thrills near the end felt rushed and lazy.Passage to Mars
A documentary about an journey across the Arctic with a prototype vehicle (strangely a Humvee?) as a preparation for a journey to mars
Wittenberg
03-09-2017
Good but relies on tricks
I have mixed feelings about the constant voice over. There are only so many ways to depict a driving car, so they desperately needed to alternate with the shots of Mars, which, while atmospheric, felt a bit like cheating. It managed to keep me interested though.Particle Fever
Documentary about of the events that led up to the confirmation of the Higgs bosson in the Large Hadron Collider
Wittenberg
05-09-2015
Interesting look at an incredible machine
There is a slight overload of scientific superlatives on how important and revolutionary it all is. But with a device like that, and theories like that, and findings like that, I suppose they are right! Quite fascinating.Parasite
A poor family finds ways to infiltrate in the household of a rich family
Wittenberg
13-09-2023
Varied, interesting and entertaining
A well-rounded and well made movie that has a little bit of everything, and remains fresh by taking multiple new directions. I liked it, but do not fully feel the 'masterpiece' status it has. People applaud it's 'social commentary' - but if they mean rich and poor - then well duh.Paranorman
Not only does this kid see ghost, he is now trying to get rid of zombies and a witchcurse too.
Wittenberg
28-05-2013
Horror for kids, made with love and style
Unique stylish claylooks, a wonderful atmosphere, great effects and big heart.Paranormal Whacktivity
Sexually frustrated couple is haunted by ghost (also sexually frustrated)
Wittenberg
28-10-2013
A terrible movie that almost made it to being just bad
Amateuristic, improvised, messy and - worst of all - unfunny throughout. But: I think they had fun on the set, and the actors could have, in theory, pulled this off. Something actually funny was lurking in the shadows.Paranormal Activity: Ghost Dimension
It's about ghostly activity all caught on camera
Wittenberg
18-03-2018
Fresh in the wrong place
They invoke some more obvious, frequent and in your face material, which I can understand was necessary to breath some live into the formula. But the slow, nail biting chance of maybe catching a glimpse kind of was the point. So now it starts to er towards a regular horror glued by jumpscares.Paranormal Activity 2
(mostly) securitycamera footage of a family being haunted
Wittenberg
10-01-2016
Novel en successful idea approach to a horror flick
Probably a rehash of part 1, but since I have not yet seen that, I will honor this one for the brave, effective and chilling way of telling a horror story. The actual events and pacing are a bit under powered for it to become truly terrifying, though.Parallels
A mysterious phonecall from a missing father leads people into a strange building that opens up to alternate earths
Wittenberg
12-02-2017
Nice idea poorly executed
Love the basic idea, but it's executed poorly with rather annoying young adults delivering really bad lines and making everything seem hopelessly amateuristic.Padington 2
The bear is saving for a perfect gift for his aunt, but he is not the only interested in it
Wittenberg
30-08-2020
Warm and cozy
It's hard to fault this family-friendly, cozy, good looking and amusing comedy, as they balanced of of these things just about right for the target audience. Personally, I'd like some more edge, but this is probably the wrong movie to ask.Pacific Rim: Uprising
The monsters have been defeated, but not for long
Wittenberg
03-01-2019
Do you like robot fights?
Listen, I just came here for giant robots smashing huge monsters, and got what I wanted. Never mind that every person in this movie is a ridiculous Hollywood abomination and everything they say and do is stupid as can be, making this essentially a horrible Power Rangers movie with no soul.Pacific Rim
To combat giant monsters from the sea, mankind built equally giant robots. Really GIANT.
Wittenberg
04-08-2013
Also a ferocious battle between great CGI and a great movie
Even a spectacle of this caliber, with such magnificent visuals, still would need a better story and characters to leave a lasting impression and score higher. But the dumb 'n fun factor sort of works here.Oxygene
Woman awakes in a pod with only limited time to find out why... before oxygen runs out
Wittenberg
28-05-2021
A bold idea done pretty well
A bold and interesting idea, but will looking at the same confined woman for an entire movie be interesting enough? During the first half I wasn't sure, but then it comes up with enough twists and some impressive shots to make it work. Not by a huge margin, but certainly enough.Overlord
A ww2 squad lands into German-occupied France to blow up a tower, but encounter dark occult nazi experiments on their way
Wittenberg
31-05-2019
Meaty mix
A mixture of war, action and horror, delivering a meaty and enjoyable watch. It is, however, not super exciting nor super scary, and it is let down by some cliches and annoying characters, especially that damn kid.Outwaters, The
Found footage of 4 friends who went into the desert and encountered various hardships
Wittenberg
30-12-2023
found random nonsense
First there's the usual get to know the annoying characters, then for a moment it's slightly interesting, only to then plummet into a mess of unclear, pointless, loud, endless and absolutely RANDOM events thrown at you because noone knew what this was about.Outside the Wire
After neglecting an order, a drone pilot is send to join a mysterious supersoldier on a dangerous quest
Wittenberg
23-01-2021
Tries to be something it's not
With military action and gun-toting robots, this ought to has been my thing. But I was quiet disappointed. Mostly because they talk tough and say deep things, but it all falls completely flat. It's just trying too hard to be cool and relevant without following up on it.Outpost, The
Surrounded by high ground, US soldiers in Afganistan try to survive in this highly untactical basecamp
Wittenberg
30-08-2020
Generic characters having an intense firefight
This is being applauded for it's realism, but unfortunately that meant for me that I remained somewhat indifferent during the long intense finale, because up until that point all they were were cursing, chit-chatting, anonymous soldiers. Armadillo WAS realism and had relatable, likable people in it.Ouija: Origin of Evil
Family cons people with staged sceances for a living, but are forced to do the real thing when they are running out of money
Wittenberg
28-10-2018
A little mainstream but not bad
It doesn't break any new grounds and is fairly reminiscent of mainstream horror these days. But it does manage to hold it's own with some decent moments, the 60's entourage and fine actresses.Other Side of the Door, The
Devastated by the tragic loss of her son, the woman resorts to an indian supernatural ritual to speak to him one last time - and exectutes it wrongly
Wittenberg
10-07-2016
Fair horror
I loved the Indian setting and the story had potential, but ultimately it keeps relying on familiar tricks and I thought everyone was overacting a bit.Other Life
Scientist invents memory injections, but when it is used against her the line between real and artificial memory starts to blur
Wittenberg
27-12-2017
Lifeless
Nothing wrong with the idea, but it is let down by the miscasted lead playing the cocky, cold emo-scientist. The story is also annoyingly vague, and not in the intriguing, mind-bending way I was hoping for. A few days after watching this, my wife asked how it ended and I had no idea what to say.Other Lamb, The
A small cult with a single male leader herding only females lives in seclusion in the woods. Revolt looms.
Wittenberg
28-11-2021
Minimalistic but not
The cinematography is as sober and plain as the cult members live their lives. It's almost a collage of images and unspoken emotions instead of a traditional story, but you still can feel the revolution building up beneath the skin. Good.Osmosis
Futuristic clinic develops an implant that will help people find their soulmate. But there are plenty of problems as the grand opening comes closer.
Wittenberg
05-03-2023
An original but sterile scifi drama
These series score with originality, a gloomy atmosphere and a couple of interesting storylines. However, the scenery, characters and atmosphere are so ice-cold and sterile that it is hard to empathize any with it - nor did I find everything very logical.Osiris Child, The
Pilot must save his daughter from a planet overrun by vicious beasts
Wittenberg
08-04-2019
Bits and pieces
At times this has some pretty graphics, some decent acting and some passable action scenes. But if also features some annoying characters to ruin things, and as a whole felt a bit directionless, and empty.Orphan: First Kill
The woman who looks like a child infiltrates the first home to go for the kill
Wittenberg
28-12-2022
Pointless and boring prequel
Many people were impressed bu apparent plot twist, but I was very bored with this empty shell, and found the acting was quite problematic. Adults acting like children is always so over the top, like they act like a caricature of a generic child. Weird and cringy.Orphan
After a miscarriage a family takes in an orphan, but they take in a lot more than they bargained for
Wittenberg
20-02-2022
Adult enough to avoid horror pitfalls, but doesn't add much either
For the most part it stays away from cheap scares, and has enough confidence to slowly but surely built up the tension and story, and reach a fairly creative reveal. But it fails to get under your skin as it remains slightly tame and suffers from some implausibility.Orbita 9
Woman on a long solo space mission gets a visit from a mechanic, after which she learns the true nature of her mission
Wittenberg
08-08-2021
Nice scifi with a twist. One twist - early on.
With a plotline that it's impossible to describe accurately without ruining it, this is a pleasant scifi done just fine. It's just that, after the big twist it's, sort of de-energizes a few notches. When the big reveal is almost at the beginning, it's harder to keep us hooked.Oppenheimer
A biography of the father of the atomic bomb
Wittenberg
11-08-2023
A fascinating drama disguised as an adrenline action ride
A very intense and splendidly shot, acted and directed movie. But part of me thought Nolan was cheating, by presenting what is essentially a drama as an pumping action movie, using all of his film-making prowess. There was a dissonance beween what was actually happening and how it was presented.Open Water 2: Adrift
People on a yacht trip jump in the water to go for a swim, but forgot to put down the ladder first
Wittenberg
15-11-2015
It will pull you in, too
I didn't want to go see this movie, but the terrifying story and suspense did keep me glued to the screen. The confusing ending with mixed memories from a past wasn't really necessary.Open Water
Scuba diving couple emerges to find the boat not there
Wittenberg
06-08-2023
A nailbiter that kept reeling me in
I wanted to do something else but I could not resist this movie. My complements for making the simple plot and scenery not a limitation but a strength. The natural, almost amateuristic camerawork and non-sensationalist footage of sharks is also a masterstroke making everything up close and personal.Only God Forgives
Drug dealer in Thailand gets caught up a bloody circle of revenge when his brother is killed
Wittenberg
27-10-2013
Bloodred
Dark, bloody and mesmerizing movie that views like a comicbook, the way it slowly serves it's mostly static scenes one by one.Ones Below, The
Happy and pregant couple has dito neighbours living below them, but things get vaul when those neighbours loose their baby
Wittenberg
07-01-2018
Good
A very decent, well acted and engrossing thriller with a good built-up.Olympus has Fallen
Terrorists take over whitehouse, fallen security agent comes to the rescue
Wittenberg
02-01-2014
The same old mistakes
A dark atmosphere and some hefty gung-ho warfare could have made this intense, were it not for the inevitable patriotism and flag waving, annoying Hollywood plot conveniences and stereotype terrorists (oh come on - nuclear launch codes, again?).Older Gods
A man retreats into a house to study the mysterious legacy of his friend, involving something larger than us, even larger than God
Wittenberg
12-10-2023
A decent cosmic horror, lacking some weight
These low budget movies have no choice but being a slow burner, but that need not be a problem if the story supports it. And well, I was quite interested to see where this was going and appreciated the ideas. Ultimately though, it was a little too thin and minimalistic to really leave a mark.Oldboy
A man is held captive for 15 years for unknown reasons, and is out for revenge when he finally gets out.
Wittenberg
12-03-2023
curious revenge tale
A curious revenge tale that benefits from some surrealistic and disorienting elements. Highly original and quite brutal at times. But I must admit that none of it really stuck - i am having a hard time remembering it.Old
People trapped on a secluded beach get old very quickly
Wittenberg
28-08-2021
Attractive mystery let down by words and characters
I love Shyamalan's enticing and mysterious stories, as well as the way he floats the camera through them. So I will probably watch all of them, but unfortunately this one was let down by rather clunky dialogue, delivered unnaturally by odd characters. It felt like watching a play.Offering (aka Abyzou), The
Man secretely wanting to sell his fathers funeral home, has to deal with cleansing it from evil first
Wittenberg
01-07-2023
Waisted
Despite one of the scariest locations I know (morgues), tastefully lit scenery and a promise of creepy Orthodox Jewish reli-horror, this movie was unable to craft it into something scary or interesting. Instead, it has only really, really tiresome loud-noise jumpscares to offer.Oculus
Brother and sister try to get even with a mysticial mirror that causes supernatural drama and terror in their childhood
Wittenberg
21-09-2014
Some scares, a lot of annoyances
They sure know how to do good scares, and there's some nice ideas for the story framework as well. But the present-past alternations gets tiresome quickly, and I was totally put off by the analytical, cold and utterly unconvincing attitude and going-about of the (present day) sister.Occupation Rainfall
On an alien invaded earth, humans and some alied aliens set out find a mysterious rainfall that can save humanity
Wittenberg
03-07-2022
Tiresome scifi bonanza
There's actually some okay stuff here and there: some effects, some scenes, some concepts, some designs. But it's just so bloated and hysteric, like they wanted to include everything they could think of and barf it onto you in an endless stream. Very tiresome.Occhi Chiusi
A woman is living isolated in the mountains with her daughter, and things get weird. Or something.
Wittenberg
13-02-2024
Not only hard to see, also hard to grasp
With dark and often very closed-up imagery, and depressing and slow flow, it certainly has a ominous and unsettling vibe to it. But I found the story too unclear and vague to make much of it. I am not sure what it was about, and that's not always a good thing.Oblivion
Engineer is looking after droids doing their last business on earthbefore mankind heads for titan. But is it like that?
Wittenberg
19-05-2013
pretty sci-fi mindmangler
Extremely beautiful and a pleasant SF mindbender. Some ideas we have seen before, and it maybe a bit sterile, but it blends very well.Obi-Wan Kenobi
Obi-Wan is forced to come into action when young princess Leia is abducted by the Empire
Wittenberg
12-08-2022
A rather tired bulge of more Starwars
It's always nice to have another fix of Starwars, but frankly it is getting increasingly harder to get high from it. This series was low-energy and somehow has no impact on the saga. There are also some poorly choreographed action scenes that may have worked in the 70's, but look ridiculous today.OA, The
A missing blind girl one day returns with sight, and an amazing story about the afterlife she entrusts to a small group of people
Wittenberg
25-12-2023
Problematic, but the premise may pull you through
Another Netflix endeavor with a mysterious story that is only just able to make you watch the whole thing, but requires you to sit through excruciatingly slow passages and episodes, flat one-trick characters, many dubious plot-points and even some crinche here and there. The twist felt uninspired.Nymphomaniac II
The nymph carries on to tell her live story to her new analytic friend
Wittenberg
10-08-2015
Dark and unpleasant but somehow very relevant too
Darker than the previous one, (even) more difficult to digest too. But something about it feels relevant and it is quite an intense experience that keeps you gazing in awe.Nymphomaniac I
Man brings home a woman he found lying on the street, who then shares with him her life as a nymph.
Wittenberg
27-01-2015
A succesfull approach for a subject like this
I needed some time to make up my mind. Never quite sure whether it is erotic or just plain nasty, whether it is pretentious or unique and brave. Overall, not a pleasant experience, but one with impact and substance, and some images that keep on haunting me.Nun II, The
It's the Nun II
Wittenberg
22-12-2023
Good looking borefest with no story
Much like it's predecessor, there is no shortage of very moody and nicely lit scenes. Also like it's predecessor, there is a serious lack of a story to drive it along, instead it features just people moving extremely slowly from one jumpscare to the next. Remarkably boring.Nun, The
A horrorstory based around the creepy nun from The Conjuring 2
Wittenberg
10-12-2018
Relies on scary nuns in alleys, not on a good story
While the dark abbey and nun figure do look terrifying, it soon becomes evident that this simply a stack of people slowly walking through creepy corridors and slowly turning their heads towards the next jumpscare. The story or built-up is seriously lacking and it started to bore me.Nude Nuns with Big Guns
After being sold an abused as a sex slave, a nun sets out to take revenge.
Wittenberg
10-04-2016
Nice and campy
Much like Tarantino movies, it shamelessly celebrates campy, violent, badly acted, poorly edited movies taking please in sweaty Mexican style landscapes. It does so quite well, but it also doesn't do much more than that. And the guns weren't that big either.November Man, The
Retired CIA top wonderboy is asked for one more gig. He steps in because someone close to him is involved...
Wittenberg
31-05-2015
Fine espionage
A decent, classic espionage action flick. It is a bit low on standout moments though, and the cockiness and skills of the main character can be too much at times.Nova
On a spaceship to mars, an android is struggling with acceptance by the human captain, other androids and her own developing emotions
Wittenberg
29-01-2023
Looks and feels like a school project
Rather than pointing out the numerous problems in this (homemade?) movie, a more important question would be if the fundamental philosophical issues raised somehow make the them irrelevant, merely an accessory tool for conveying a thought provoking message? No.Northman, The
When his father is killed, a young viking grows up with nothing but revenge on his mind
Wittenberg
17-04-2022
Great as a spectacle, but average in involvement
A big, brutal, sweaty and intense historic epic, that I was spectating and enjoying rather than feeling. Perhaps because all characters continuously speak in this these articulated, poetic, over-dramatic phrases, which kind of dehumanizes them. It worked in Lighthouse, here it alienates.Nope
When a horse ranch family finds a otherworldy presence is lurking in the skies above them, they set out to capture it on film and get rich
Wittenberg
21-08-2022
somewhat odd and different but very tasty
The main thing going through my mind was how slightly odd and different this is. The characters, the story, the humor, the flow, it's all a bit odd, but in a refreshingly blunt way. It provides plenty to ponder on, and contains some of the most interesting and well done UFO scenes I know.Non Stop
Air marshall tries to deal with a terrorist threatening to kill the passages on his flight, getting himself framed in the process
RockmeNow
17-09-2015
Over the top in a nice way
I don't buy many aspects of the story, but I enjoyed it anyway!Wittenberg
24-02-2015
Good old fashioned suspense
An reasonably intense thriller with a constantly high adrenaline level, and a pleasant 'old fashioned' simplicity of execution. Near the end they go a little overboard with the whodunnit game, and the far fetched motives and plans of the terrorist are yeh-right.Noise
When a man start looking into his father's life and the factory he worked in, he becomes more insane as more secrets emerge
Wittenberg
22-03-2023
ok but lots of loose ends
Although we liked this movie, with it's relaxed but pleasantly mysterious atmosphere and decent characters, it felt badly insecure about the story it wanted to tell. Was it about the factory? The father? The mother? Was noise really so much of an theme to warrant the title? Hmmm.Nocebo
A woman gets sick after being biten by a tick, so she seeks help from her Filipina household who uses folklore on her
Wittenberg
29-03-2023
Fair enough, but lacks intensity
It's a decent movie with a twist that, even though you can see it coming, gives it some depth. It's just that it never becomes really scary or intense. It remains a bit lightweight.Noah
God asks Noah to built a boat to save all animals from the upcoming global flood
Wittenberg
21-09-2014
Strong but very religious (duh!)
Strong and well made epic. Once they are on the boat, the endless contemplations about God's intentions and whether killing baby's is ok, is quite a lot to take in.No One Will Save You
A girl versus aliens invading her home
Wittenberg
20-03-2024
Mostly a decent home invasion movie
I liked the idea of a single, cute girl in a dress facing such dreadful odds, and it certainly has some strong scenes and moments. After a while though, I thought it became a bit directionless, and the surreal dreamy ending felt slapped on without really knowing what it was supposed to mean.No Hard Feelings
A girl gets a car - if she dates an undatable
Wittenberg
28-01-2024
Another fine romcom with not much else
It's good for a few laughs and some well dosed emotional depth. But that, unfortunately, seems to be the review I end up writing every freaking 'romcom' out there. I wish it would have found away to rise above this.No Country for Old Men
A sherrif, hunter and hitman get involved when a bag of money is left after a deadly showdown in the desert
RockmeNow
30-12-2014
Intense movie
This movie sucks you right in, forces the viewer to smell the desert and all the rotten things that will happen later on. Great acting, intense experience...Wittenberg
21-09-2014
Hot and involving
The Texas desert heat oozes of the screen, as does a firework display of class acting. The slow pacing only contributes to the constant feeling of stress and dredd of things to come.Ninjago
The green ninja is having daddy issues, so he and his team venture into the jungle to find the ultimate ultimate weapon to defeat him
Wittenberg
11-10-2017
Unbalanced
These LEGO movies will deliver the frantic action and fun, but I found it an unbalanced with a restless first half and then too much over-emotional scenes in the second one. But who am I? My son rated it 9.5.Nightingale, The
After unspeakable cruelty was done to a woman and her family, she chases down the perpetrators through the Tasmanian bush, with the aid of a native aboriginal
Wittenberg
12-05-2020
Heavy, but very good
It covers a lot of heavy-handed subjects (racism, revenge, rape, murder, repression) and inevitably features some tough scenes. But it has all been done really well. I liked how during the revenge part she remained fragile and insecure, and didn't have sudden superskills that came out of nowhere.Nightflyers
The crew on a spaceship, on it's way to make contact with alien lifeforms, finds itself in more and more peril as they come closer
Wittenberg
18-03-2019
These poor series still contain enough mystery to make it worthwhile
So for this monumentally important mission, they assembled the most insecure, insubordinate, fashion-conscious and unstable crew they could find and make them improvise the entire mission in an insanely incoherent way. But apparently I love space mystery so much that I still watched it. All of it.Night House, The
After her husband commits suicide, the widow starts to experience strange things in the secluded house he built
Wittenberg
24-01-2022
A subtle but very satisfying horror
Wow, this really worked for me. The horror elements are subtle and tasteful, the evolving mystery is enticing and the element of grief is mixed in well. But mostly, I was quite stunned with the lead actress, who totally nails it and makes everything work beautifully.Next
A guy can see two minutes into the future, which brings him into trouble when he is asked to help prevent a terrorist attack
Wittenberg
20-12-2014
Idea not fully utilized
It's a nice idea that provides some fair entertainment. But a nuclear terrorist attack is not the most inspirational thing they could have done with it. The 'gift' soon becomes gimmicky and the story a little standard.Neon Demon, The
Unbearably beautiful girl tries a career at modelling, but her beauty leads to a dark place
Wittenberg
07-12-2016
Beautiful contrasts
The beauty of the girl amidst the cold neon lights and people, which I guess symbolizes the harsh nature of the modelling world, works out great. It then builts up to an even greater contrast with death and gore, without ever becoming cheap or revolting. Wow.Nekromantik
Couple has a fascination for collecting bodyparts, but when he brings an entire corps to have sex with, it puts their relationship to the test
Wittenberg
29-07-2022
Unpleasant but enticing curiosity
It is made poorly and looks amateuristic, but the sight of someone licking the eye-socket of a decayed corpse still makes this have an impact way bigger than it's budget would have you believe. Vile and uncomfortable, but also unique, brave and an interesting niche product to have experienced. Once.Neighbors
Young couple with a baby has a fraternity move in next door. The war begins
Wittenberg
15-03-2015
Watching people having fun wasn't much fun
The lead actors put in a lot of energy and effort into it, but cannot save this mediocre comedy with a shortage of good jokes. The endless fraternity partying and self-contempted mayhem was rather exhausting to me.Nebraska
A son goes on a trip with his dementing father who thinks he won a million dollar
RockmeNow
10-01-2015
A movie to remember
Touching and impressive movie about unfillfilled dreams, both the complexity and simplicity of growing old, and the love of a son for his fatherNaked Lunch
Cockroach exterminator gets intoxicated by the poisonous gas and a surreal, bizarre story starts. Like typewriters that are mucus producing alien heads.
Wittenberg
05-09-2014
Bizarre, they way some like it
A little slowish perhaps, but pleasantly bizarre, strange and filthy in true Cronenberg style.My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell it to
Brother and sister need blood for their brother who has a very special condition
Wittenberg
29-06-2023
Different and unpleasant, and definitely worthwhile.
There's something quite unsettling about seeing normal people processing heavy dead bodies, especially when the atmosphere and acting is natural and plain. The special 'patient' even manages to evoke feelings of sympathy.Mutant Girl Squad
A girl with a mutated knive hand joins a group of other mutant girls to make a stand to those who oppose them
Wittenberg
28-04-2023
Outrageously extreme yet still slightly boring
I really wanted to like this more, as it is a deliciously bizarre Powerrangers with gore, fountains of blood and insane mutations like a chainsaw tentacle coming from someone's butt. Fantastic anarchy, but I also noticed it is utterly flat and empty, making me forget this movie in mere days.Murder Mystery 2
Murder solving couple takes a much needed break on a distant island, but soon enough they're at it again
Wittenberg
08-04-2023
Formulaic slapstick with too little good jokes
I can see what they are going for, and objectively all the ingredients are here for a shot of uncomplicated amusement. I just thought the jokes were not all that, and everything is so safe, formulaic and predictable it feels like you have already seen it - and will forget about it tomorrow.Mummy, The
Modernday thief digs up a mummy that wasn't supposed to be found, for good reason
Wittenberg
27-12-2017
Underperforms in many fields
A surprisingly boring flick that feels like it was made ten years too late and does a lot of things wrong. I was especially annoyed by the humorless role of the female interest, it never got scary or tense and it severely lacked some good music.Mulholland Drive
Woman on her way to make it in Hollywood, finds a mysterious woman in her bathroom (probably not the best summary).
Wittenberg
25-11-2021
Should have triggered me, but didn't
The Lynch-weirdness comes in late and it quite small doses, so mostly it actually felt like a movie of girlfriends going on an adventure. I love being puzzled by surrealism, but in here it didn't seem to trigger me, or the subjects and themes were just too plain.Movie 43
Teenagers scout the internet for a movie that doesn't exist, taking them through various bizarre movies as they go
Wittenberg
28-01-2014
fascinatingly unfunny
In itself I can see potential in the jokes on offer. But I just gazed at these clumsy, grime and bizarre sketches without laughing once, becoming almost fascinated in the process. It's one of those 'You need the right drug first' movies, but if you find which one, it could be hysterical.Mountain Between Us, The
Man and woman survice a crashlanding in the snowy mountains, and now face survival as well as a developing forbidden love between them
Wittenberg
14-09-2020
Yeh sort of works
Throughout the film there's alternating scenes of them taking a few more steps, and then a much longer scene of them resting and developing feelings for each other amidst all misery. Both are fine, but none of them felt very profound.Mountain
A documentary that explores our relationship with mountains
Wittenberg
04-03-2023
A poetic analysis
Instead of a dry analytic approach, it chooses a more poetic blend of music, philosophic narration and plenty of spectacular images. Very beautiful, but I remained on my couch nonetheless. And while the sport scenes are probably rightfully part of the story, they felt a bit dissonant to me.Mother!
In an isolated house, a woman struggles with her husband's increasing tendency to have strangers stay over, up until extreme and paranormal levels (this description probably sucks, you tell me!)
Wittenberg
28-09-2017
A different kind of horror
A reminder that horror and unrest can come in many shapes, not just ghouls and ghosts. A disturbing but very engrossing experience which I thought was fresh, well acted and intense. It felt great to see a movie again that sticks with you and leaves a goddamn impression.Mother of No Destination, A
First, people that discover the immenent end of the world are hunted down, then the remaining people on a space ark are terrorized
Wittenberg
03-08-2021
Let's call it art
Listen, I really tried to look at this as a completely homemade, completely amateur movie, but even then I did not find any redeeming qualities. Maybe it's deliberately trying to be as bad as can be, so that it becomes art or intoxicating. I must admit I felt weird after watching it.Mother / Android
When all butler androids turn roque against mankind, a pregnant woman and friend embark on a journey to a safe place
Wittenberg
14-01-2022
Good, misses some opportunities
A more than decent survival and motherhood story, but it could have been denser and nerve-wrecking in places. Also, there's a twist near the end that could have been huge, but it's almost like they didn't really follow up on it, and went with a rather swampy emotional ending instead.Mosul
Young police officer joins swat team fighting ISIS
Wittenberg
20-12-2020
A raw, unpolished war story
There is something very loose about the story and directing, giving it a docu like atmosphere as you observe these brave guys like a fly on the wall. It also meant I was not over involved with them either, but it's a good watch nonetheless.Mortal Kombat (2021)
Warriors are gathered to fight other warriors in another realm
Wittenberg
19-06-2021
A step closer to a good videogame movie
With a promising beginning, overall high production standards, appearance of several game characters and even some fatalities (which are oddly more gutting in the game than in the movie) this was close to an actual decent game movie. But the dull, flat characters and story again let it down badly.Moon 44
Pilot/cop goes undercover to a mining planet to oversee the convict pilots fighting of an alien invasion
Wittenberg
13-08-2023
A disappointing story in a cool scifi environment
The scenery, with it's dark and steamy hallways and spaceships, is remarkably like an Aliens, so that's good! The story though, is mostly convicts and and their navigators fighting, while the hero smokes cigarettes and tries to look cool - not really interesting.Moon, The
An ill-fated Korean moon mission turns into a rescue mission
Wittenberg
30-12-2023
Looks okay, afwul kitch movie
Space rescue can be quite exciting, and this one looks snappy for sure. Unfortunately, it's filled with plastic characters, overacting and turns into a sludge of melodramatic kitsch with tears over piano music.Movies found: 1030 | max movies per page: 100 | Showing: 301 - 400
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